Judge, 1888-11-17 · page 7 of 18
Judge — November 17, 1888 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several short satirical pieces typical of late-19th century American humor: **"At the County Fair"** depicts rural characters (Eben and Elviry) nervously approaching what appears to be livestock, playing on rustic stereotypes. **"The Only Correct Time Piece"** jokes about hotel incompetence—the clerk admits their clock runs ten minutes fast, yet claims it's the only correct one. **"Continually on Duty"** satirizes a struggling writer/editor (Jokem) who apparently conducts business pitching his work at night rather than during daylight hours. **"Not So Talkative"** is a proto-feminist joke: a hotel charges women 50 cents for phone calls versus the male rate, implying women talk excessively. **"A Bad Investment"** features Jewish characters (Solomon Levi, Isaac) using Yiddish dialect—a common Judge stereotype. Isaac trades expensive clothing for a parrot that shouts anti-Catholic slurs during an Irish procession, costing him business. The page reflects period prejudices alongside general comedic observations about human folly and social hypocrisy.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
AT THE COUNTY FAIR. Ensen (to his wife)—" Come along, Elviry! He won't hurt ye.” y Etvirv—‘* Oh, lands, Eben! I don’t like the looks of the nasty little thing.” THE ONLY CORRECT TIME PIECE. Traveler (in hotel)—* How's that clock? Right?” Clerk — Yes, sit; that’s the only clock in the house that’s right, and that’s ten minutes fast.” FLarty (representing the rear section)— Say, Dick! if Nibsy ‘sa goin’ ter smoke them. Pittsburg Victoria cigars, I'm a comin’ out.” Beazep Dick—'* Ladies an’ his spring fits, an’ yer'll file out whi fal mill at McGee's ts, der buff'ler’s got one of der band plays * Dat beauti- Euviry (in the next department)—" Why, you dear ole beauty you !" CONTINUALLY ON DUTY. The editor (kindly)—" V'm afraid, Mr. Jokem, that you are burning the midnight oil too steadily. Don’t you think that work in the day-time might bring better results ? Jokem—* Bless my soul, sir! if 1 did my work in the day-time when could I tramp round to sell it?" NOT SO TALKATIVE. “ Fifty cents, please,” said the hotel clerk to the lady who had been using the telephone. “1 thought the charge was only "she replied. he returned. “But that is the rate for men, you know,” PLEASANT AND LOVELY. They lived a life All free from strife, ‘And when he came to die He said, * My dear, devo Just one request make I. A SUGGESTION TO THE “FINEST. Go on, I hear, Adolphus dear,” ‘The woman said and sighed. “ This quite reminds me of last year When my fourth husband died."* They are neat and unsuspicious looking, and may be carried with impunity. “Tis this,” he said, With drooping head (Voice loving, as before), ™ Please do not wed Till 1 am dead, ‘And cefpe is on the door.” x. G A BAD INVESTMENT. Solomon Levi—* Vot vos der mat- ter, Isaac? You looks down in der mouth,” Tsaac—" | vos the victim of a ter- ribleact of injustice,Solomon. An Irish- man comes into my clodin; trades me a $25 parrot for a suit of clothes. De clothes costs me 9§ cents. Thangs de parrot out by de door and pretty soon along comesan Irish proces- sion. De parrot shouts Shoot the pope!” Ah! dis was a cruel world, Solomon.” solomon Levi—"*Yes, Isaac, it Tsaac—" Shelp me 'f it didn’t cost a. But they are also very, ful and obviate the me a hundred tollars to get anew front gangtr ainayc nnardant On eeehing the cue dene put in mine store.” of saloons, (Patert applied for.) comicbooks.com