Judge — October 20, 1888 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HIS OCCUPATION. ™ Me brudder Jake, he sells banan’s, On der row, acrost fr'm der Hall : An’ Jerry, he runs a junk-coupé, An’ Tim, he's got der call (On chuckin’ ice fer a Mott street man; Rut der beat of “em all is me brudder Dan! ™ Dan's got der job uf a substitoot On der Batt'ry sparry police ; An’ he whacks der Dutch as dey cross der way Frum der Garden, like flocks uv geese, ‘An’ he gits der chance t'—" What do / do?” Wid a fam'ly like dat—s-a-a-y—what would your” VAG A DEVOUT INFERENCE. Jones, who has reading a good de: of locusts in Algeria this summer, was moved the other d make the following sententious remark “I find in the appearance of these insects a fresh proof of the of a God—for man could certainly never have invented recently been ree pan THIS STYLE Isaacson leedle ?” Rowe SHOULD BE PATENTED. “You gomplain because dhose pants haf shrunk a —" A little ? Ssaacson— De tings are like tights, dot was de peauty of my clodhings ; dey vas loose und easy in de summer, but dhey grow closer und comfordable vhen de cold vedder comes on. Ain'd you got any style apoud you anyvay ?” A MOTHER-IN-LAW. Before and After taking. OBEYED THE DOCTOR’S ORDERS. .”" said the tramp, as he appeared at the farm-house door, you kindly lend me a comb Don't you carry one with you?” she asked. “No, ma‘am: I don’t have very much use for it, The doctor ordered me not to comb my hair more than once a week, and if 1 done with me I might be tempted to disobey him! This is Wednesday, is it not? Thank you very much, Good morning, ease as you. JUST THE OTHER WAY. He—"T never met anyone who could talk and play at th T don’t suppose you use your brain at all if Sit-—"* Oh yes, indeed, altogether; but U don't use it in my conversation. time with so much REE RADE ARTY ALLEN, OTALLY ULV A BIT OF FUTURE HISTORY, In the white house reservation known as Washington, D. C., Roamed a very famous scientist, fond of geologee, And one day, as he was chipping through the strata of the rocks ‘That surround the reservation, with a few well-chosen knocks, He detached an unique specimen that bore a fossil face, enses its age he tried to place : ‘Then hied him home and took a book from out his learned store, And traced its characteristics back till he could trace no more. And then within his cabinet his re And on its skull he gummed a slip, “This was in ages so remote its vestiges are few, The very last live leader of a tribe the ancients knew, “ That called themselves ‘The Democrats: their roar was’ Kill protection? But they vanished 1888, in mists of thick This creature's boldest boast was, * Weight of pedigree I've none? But he was loaded down with veto bills so that he couldn't run; “And attempting a {ree trade with them, and all United States, He died of suffocation, as was ordered by the fates, Then at his bier, dissolved in tears, his party was saluted Into a mixture that was mixed till quite too much diluted, * For the man whose genial snufl-box, they supposed, held all together, By the bonds of com left it out in stormy weather, Along with his bandana, and the havoc that was played With his treasures broke his Roman heart, so he was useless made. © "Twas found, after the funeral, that the ground was scattered o'er With fragments quite promiscuous, dyed in each other's go And the cheek of the whole party had soaked through into th (Of the leader that was buried this one fossil (reak to save.”” ARISTINE ANDERCON UNAPPRECIATED KINDNESS. STREET URCHIN—"* Ili dere, Dat load’s afire !" SIGNOR SPAGATATTI—" Diabolo! willa you minda your own bizzinessa ?”