Judge, 1888-08-18 · page 10 of 18
Judge — August 18, 1888 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* contains several short satirical pieces reflecting turn-of-the-century American social attitudes: **"The New Cupid"** mocks romantic literature's declining appeal among young women, who now prefer athletic men. The satire suggests that modern girls value athletic achievement (Yale vault records, "hundred yards" sprint times) over poetry—a commentary on shifting courtship values and women's growing interest in athleticism. **"Her Name for Them"** is a brief children's joke about a girl confusing "mutton chop" whiskers (a facial hair style) with actual meat. **"An Impossibility"** satirizes the Catholic Church by having a child report that during services "there wasn't nobody there but the curate"—implying the priest's absence of spiritual presence, a jab at clergy. **"Looking Ahead"** humor involves a girl's wedding-day parasol attachment. **"Misery Loves Company"** references Germany's "surplus question"—likely relating to post-WWI German economic problems or arms/military surplus. **"Presence of Mind"** depicts working-class characters making light of danger (coat catching fire), showing period class-based humor stereotypes.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE THE NEW CUPID. The days are gone when some sweet rhyme Sufficed to win a maiden ; We live not in that olden time Which with romance was laden. Poor literature! For all its pearls No least demand arises What catches all the pretty girls Now is athletic prizes! Here's Rertie—she whose tender eyes I've been in verse exalting ; Tom let her choose and keep a prize He won at Vale~for vaulting ! And so she keeps my verses in Some dusty drawer of corner, While at her throat she weary'a pin And Mabel? When she made " her quilt” (O aunts, you've spoilt your nieces!) She kept us fellows all atilt And thus itis, We've no redress; These athlete chaps will edrry Our girls all off. Now, Hove Jess, But Jess— she worships Harry we bards? . Harry's some attraction His record for the“ hundred yards" Ten seconds and a fraction | She begged me to present her, While Jim's" prize badges" were so fine ‘They all went in the center. YRANK KOE #ATCHELDER, HER NAME FOR THEM. Bella's little sister was asked to describe Be the family; she did very well till she came to the whiskers, and then she hesitated : pey’re some kind of lovely meat whiskers, but it #sn's beefsteak, and I can't think.” She had heard Bella say, Algerno lover by a friend of The mutton chop is so becoming to you. HOW RECONCILE THESE THINGS? Small boy flies. Father—* Very true, my son Small boy—" Well, and a little while after he said, ‘time leaves foot- prints.” Now, pa, how can ‘time leave footprints if it flies?” ay, pa! teacher said to-day, ‘study hard, boys, time ‘The lucky man would be happy if he wasn’t always afraid his luck would change. AT THE CLUB. “ Heard about Robin: No; what's the mat- case of grand he got away with a capital joke last night.” “Oh, well, we must forgive a first offenc AN IMPOSSIBILITY. “Well!” asked her mamma of a little girl who had) just returned from church; “did you pray to the good Lord “No, mamma, 1 couldn't; he wasn’t there: there wasn't nobody there but the curate.” down ulcer: M LOOKING AHEAD. Little Angeline had been given a_pink-silk parasol. This she con- sidered as her dearest earthly possession, and would never allow it out of her sight, night or day. On being jested with on the subject she replied: * No, I shall never part with it.” “ But on your wedding day you'll have to.” “Oh, then, I'll give it to my children to keep for me.” POPULAR SONG ILLUSTRATED. Hold the ** Forte.” MISERY LOVES COMPANY. What! Germany has a surplus question to cope with too? well! Shake! Well, PRESENCE OF MIND. Mas. SHERMAN (fo Caldwell, 2 Aas put his pipe in his pocket)— love o' hivin, yure coat-tail’s afire, sor ! Fr th’ CaLpwett—"* Thanks, me good woman ; keep th’ change, donchernaw !" FLERE = comicbooks.com