Judge — June 2, 1888 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE THE KORPUSCLE LECTURES. HE. Veterinary and Polytechnic Institute is beautifully situated on the Erie canal between Syracuse and a point equally distant in an- other direction. Being thus cen- trally located and on the berm bank of the canal, where rural scenery is mingled with maritime pictures, and four hundred miles of bath room passes the door at the expense of akindly and paternal government, the -institute from the word go has clambered along af the head®f'the procession. A kindly but injudi- cious patron of the school had died and left $50,000, the interest of which was to maintain a course of lectures each year for the benefit of the students, These lectures were to be delivered by a leading man of the age, and on scientific subjects. Prof. Korpuscle and myself decided that the lecture fund was a good thing and should be kept in the family. Myself and Korpuscle are the faculty of the school, and we decided that Korpuscle was a leading man of the age. His lecture on the social communist and the common socialist was a gem of its kind, and we unanimously voted that he should deliver the course one ir and capture the appropriation, and I should absorb the dowry the next year. We have been unanimous ever since, with the exception of scattering votes between us about Christmas and New Year's, when too much brandy gets into the mince pie. Korpuscle likes to attack a great big national question with the long THE INDIAN, ared two hundred years ago. His food and his out-door life made him a fine type of man. In fact, a big, broad-faced type, and he almost sprang from a capital fount. We will take an impression of him over the other wo. nize the next figure on the chart. “ Wherever the pretzel with its delicate curves has improved art or the order of sweitzer kase has penetrated or lager has filtered, the German has left his impress on society or whatever he has sat down upon. His beer and his attributes have entered largely into the Amegican charac- ter. The next is a well-known picture “ How largely this figure has entered into the composite man can be discovered at the Register’s office in New: York city. It is away up into the millions. His heart is as light as his own Cork, and his humor has as many twists in it as his own Dublin. Tn governing his native land he has failed often, but in governing American cities Yes; I see you all recog- ONE OF THE PILGRIM FATHERS, he is a shining success. Cheated out of his vote at home, he is here a pertin cious and indefatigable voter. He has been the sweetest poet, the bravest warrior, and the greatest statesman in the world, but always away from home. He is the cuckoo’s egg in the nests of the world, but he always hatches and sings his native note when he comes out of the shell. “You may break, you may shatter his head SEHUDMERS md eet to pay. i you will, But the trace of the Mickey is over us stil When he die policeman’s badge on $ object to heaven if there is any rent ‘Take this fifth impression over the others and you have the an composite man. he will look for a Mak Peter on you protec plant s and ha Favori thousa “Observe! the long legs and of it. box arid sideboards on, His first lecture was on “Composite Man.” “ Young men, these Tectures are to occupy three quarters of an hour and the front room of the museum cach week. Absorb them into your system, permeate great facts, and inflate your soft and gradually expanding heads with ideas, 1 have seen the head of that young man with lop ears from! ‘Tonawanda gradually expand in the last week. The American citizen is a composite man, You have yourself with JOHN BULL. A GERMAN. high cheek-bone have given us the bank cashier, with his supple limbs and infinite cheek, on his way to Montre: he bow, the sword the shillelah have developed the big cane. The Irish imagination have developed the Boston realistic novelist and the drummer for millinery goods. Is the composite American to realize Darwin's perfection of species or revert to the primitive type? Who knows? Let that youth from Utica stop practising with that mustard erman mysticism and drug fact Ma: thetic graph own | seen composite pictures containing every distinctive feature of a dozen per- sons put into one photograph, What do you now behold in this chart ?” box cover in order to hold an eyeglass, and that slim from Buffalo stop ring stays and gaze upon this outcome of science. We Young marr from Yonkers wakes up and says: “ That's one of the six- horse drivers with a wild west show, “You are very nearthe truth, That is an Indian, the aboriginal owner of the soil. He is the type of man this climate produces in a wild state. Only a few specimens are left on the continent. Some sadly roam around the world with wild west shows, looking savage, dancing war-dances, and smelling like a morocco tannery in a cyclone. Fine cut wooden figures of the Indian remain in front of stores where fine-cut is sold. What few descend- ants are left of the noble red man are scalping tickets along the lines of railroad, What do you next behold on the chart? “No, young man, that is not Barrett playing Richard Third. That is an ancestor of Boston. That is a Plymouth-rocker. Not a new kind of easy-chair, though he has been sat down on heavy by the rest of the United States beyond Hyde Park and Brookline. ‘The Puritan was the next impres- sion on the negative after the Indian, and he went after the Indian with a sharp stick. Let your flash- ing orbs rest on this. AN IRISHMAN. “Yes, children, this is an Englishman as he ap- great things, and if we are not careful we shall slip off into the bac Janitor, kick over that bench where those four young men are aslee the whole class carry in wood until supper-time. The physical must not not be sacrificed to the mental if we have to buy a buck-saw for each mem- ber of the class.” THE OLD PROFESSOR, HER VERSION OF IT. It is a difficult matter sometimes for certain peculiarly constituted people to repeat a joke cor- rectly. In the performance of “Adonis” Mr. Dixey says, “Music hath charms to soothe the savage beast. That's why they put a brass band on a dog's neck.” A Rochester woman heard this and enjoyed it heartily, On her return home she tried to tell her husband about it.“ One of the brightest things in the whole performance,” “was this: Dixey came toward the footlights and said, ‘Music hath charms to soothe the savage breast, and that's why they put a collar on a dog!” And yet Mrs. Blank wondered why her husband didn’t laugh. she remarked, If there were no fish there would be mighty little lying. AN AMERICAN DUDL comicbooks.com