Judge — February 18, 1888 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

10 JUDGH THE DIAMOND EDITION DREADFUL SENDS A VALENTINE. Y ersteamed con ten poraries is the arthor of them emortal words * What fools t people is,” ar thing he's ‘bout right, speshully jest ‘bout this tir of the ye xplane my purfeck Iwill p ua little peace ‘of poicry which I writ night all “lone by my ownself. For fear that folks will take me for funt prodei twelve and don't wear nickerbock ers ner bangs ner play the piane Here's the poi Sum folks its valentines And sum gitg nun: rT cent a norfal thing, This year T don’t send 1. And now Pll tell you why Ldon'tsend no valentines this year. Thad anorful grud, insta woman what never would let me run through after the ball what Skinny Snow'd allers nock over ayed furst base. That woman didn’t have no hus- band mand carrymuls for her, When she went to pickni re and didn’t seem to have nobody hi She wuz allers creatin’ plans for the futur’, so she said stid Satan’d git his dew when Willie Albert w From that time I studied up how'd I git e red-hot coal-stove burdin’ and make married woman ¥ to fill her life with y come T got my vengun It norful valenti dT cent it in ted envelopes. T forge . e, but it Wiman and no man santed id Tt Willi Albert, und come » dun a big stroke of ve st for your skill in subterf ‘ome down to pa’s s He na made me own up, and when he got thro with me I felt so bad ma had to put vassylune on me and put me to bed. That's why T don't send no valentines this year, T've swored off. 4. & xeuien. ABATING A FELINE NUISANCE. ‘The cats on Dr. Slayer’s fence laughed at every kind of missile, and wouldn't budge till He tried the effects of a little electricity, and then they flew. DISTRESS. She left me, and agony reigns in my breast; My heart is too hea to mock or to je left n ember her by— I found it 1: ANOTHER BOB-SLEIGH ACCIDENT. Cnonvs— Down brates, Julius! Dar's a injine in front, an’ sumfin will be" — IT MIGHT MAKE A DISTURBANCE. Customer—* Have you some good cheese, Mr. Butter nut?” Grocer—"* Yes, indeed ; something rather loud 2” Custome: t th Mr. Butternut ; the doctor has ordered absolute quiet in the house on account of the sick baby. DOING AN IMMENSE BUSINESS, Reporter ~** How's business ?” President insurance company—" Immense, We have never in the history of the company had so many applica tions to act upon, Reporter —* Ah, applications for policies ?” President insurance company—" Er—no : paper.” blotting Follow de crowd an’ laikly yo'ull git stepped on ; but you'll know w'at’s up. comicbooks.com