Judge — December 1887 — page 39: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A CHRISTMAS EBUKE, “The best thing about Christmas,” said Meanfellow, ‘‘is that it comes once a year. “And the best thing about you,” replied Goodfel- low, with right- cous indignation, ‘tis the joyous but unreasonable proposition that you cannot come at all.” Niggah can’t githeat'nufflazin’ in de summah sun toe las’ ‘im fru de wintah win’. W'en Pompey am pummelin’ nbo, an’ Sam- boam bitin’ Pom- y, whaddo dey wat de law ys agin’ 'stu’b- in’ de peace? CHRISTMAS JUDGE UNFORTUNATE ALL AROUND. RSAY—'*Since our engagement, Clarence, Rags seems to have developed a violent friendship for you. See him now, sitting at your feet.” probably overheard your mother,—as I did,—make the remark that T was a little too good a catch to be allowed to escape, and Rags always was a good watch-dog, you know.” THE CHRISTMAS MISSIONARY. It is related that when David Kalakaua w ked what he “But,” said his private would prefer for Christmas, he answered lightly A few more “Ah! id David, reflec 37 JUST Now. Those dainty little items begin ning “ nowisthe time of year, have had: their burrs opened since the frosty days have come, but in spite of that, n—w i- t-e t-e of y—r when the grocer builds an ell on his store so as to get the raisin-box as far from the stove De mo’ gam'ler los surer he grows dat he's boun’ toe win bimeby. Nebbah worry abo't wha’ y gwine toe cotch anoddah rabbit wiile yo’ is eatin rabbit pic. ty is home again.” sa very different thing dancing-girls, if you please.” 1 will take instead, a few Christmas bibles and a hymn-book.” ON THE L. Lapy—‘ Will you oblige me by low- ering the blind? Wittiam Nye ith pleasure, Madam ; this is the shady side though.” Lapvy— ‘Tam aware of that, but the sunshine from acro; the car re- flects off your head right into my eyes. Dar is pride inde wiitewash brush fo’ de man w’o does de bes’ job wid hit. De road toe hon- esty am full ob pi fal but de road toe dishonesty a’n't no bettah, A man wid some- un ¢lse’s chicken in his pocket am li'ble toe hab a sneezin spell way down toe de boots. Dedifence tween stealin’ and_ takin’ doan’ belong toe yo’ am an iota; but hit fu’nishes material fo’ many a argument in co’t. THAT SNEAKING ICE-TENNIS. Miss BLAUVELT—‘+ Don't you think it would have been nicer to serve the ball, Mr. Arbecam, instead ‘of coming yourself? A GOOD THING FOR CHRISTMAS Many readers of using Gold Pens, and as im- provements take place from time to time they wish to assure their patrons that every improve- ment is to be found in those sold bearing their name. Writing becomes apleasure when one can depend upon having a_ reliable pen, and at this season when so many articles are presented to choose from, remember that nothing is more acceptable than a Gold Pen. Leroy W._ Fair- child Co., 189 Broad- way,N, ¥., willsend you address of dealer in your local- ity that sells their pens, if you find any difficulty in getting them. Endorsed by Clergymen, Bank- ers, Merchants and the Press throughout the United States. comicbooks.com