Judge — March 5, 1887 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUBLISHED) ONCE: A WEEK. W. J. Ameent, Hanay R. Hart Art Department Beaswanp GrLLaM Editor ~~~ ~ LM. Garoony TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS UNITED STATES AND CANADA. 18 ADVANCE, One copy, one year, or 82 numbers, One copy, six mont! ‘One copy, for 13 weet Single coptes 10 centa each, THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY, POTTER BUILDING, Park Row, President ~ Vice-President LOOK OUT FOR THE SOLDIER OF THE FUTURE. Ir Mr. M ‘G RECOVERS his health there may be a Democratic party yet AS BETWEEN BLAINE AND HILL probably the mugwumps would vote for the impending Belva Lockwood. Mr. PowDERLY HAvtNG tried to prohibit boycotting, the boycotters will immediately begin to boycott him. Boston Corsett Met with such success in capturing Wilkes Booth that he tried it on the Kansas legislature. Tue eprtoR of the Voice pipes like a peacock and spreads his tail as if he thought he were ejecting the thunder of a fog-horn. Sita Weep says Mr. Cleveland will not be willing to run again, Move to amend by striking out the words “be willing to.” No PRONOUNCED EGOTIST need be unhappy. He may get his nose pulled occasionally, but he forgets that at the close of the exercises. POLITICS MAKES STRAN BEDFELLOWS. Ever attend a political rally in a country town and feel the little Democrats bite you between the sheets at the best hotel? Gipson ONCE WROTE in his private diary, ‘I am the greatest historian that ever lived.” In his miserable conceit he forgot to look ahead and anticipate our arri MORE THAN A MILLION COPIES of Mrs. Wood's East Lynne” were sold in this country, and yet people wonder at the prevailing dispositi to jump off the big bridge. THE GRANDMOTHER OF Mrs. Senator Beck of Kentucky was a niece of George Washington. But for that Beck would probably have been a private citizen to this day. Sidpes » on with your squawking, but’ pray get through with it as soon as possible. ‘FIVE WORLDS IN ARMS cannot whip this country, $ ator Vest. It is a habit of very small nations to indulge in this twaddle, senator, Large ones cannot afford it. BIG HEAD, ACCORDING to the Sun, is the president's present affliction. The Sun located the trouble in the neck dui ATT paign, and as it has gone higher it must be dangerous. IN A CaT FIGHT, the New Orleans Picayune reminds us, the under cat has the advantage. But he must not be too far under—he must insist on being between the grass and the antagonist. THE LADIES AND GENTLEMEN of the salvation army say the kisses exchanged by them are of the holy kind, and as this kind comes without matrimony it is certainly convenient and of | the right size. “STRIKE AT THE BUSTLES!” shrieks the mu; wump of the Boston Herald. ‘* Never mind the marquis of Queensberry’s rules.” This har- monizes with the usual mugwump poli never to face the enemy and to attend solel to the fire in the rear. WOMEN KEEP THE GATES at railroad crossings in Prussia, and the declaration is made that accidents never occur there. Perhaps the en- gineers stop to swap compliments with the gate-keepers, but even then the train hands must be very cautious men. ‘G Miss Cleveland’ was a greatstickler for grammar. Once her mother said to her sharply, ‘‘ Rose Elizabeth!” ‘Al- low me to correct you,” said the young lady promptly. ‘*‘ Rise, Elizabeth,’ would be better —with a comms in the middl “THERE says the Butfalo Commercial Advertiser, who live in constant fear lest death find them without that bonnet | on.” It is the ambition of the rude man of the rowdy west to want to die with his boots on, and this would seem to be the extreme opposite of that ruling passion. Mr. Cleveland will’ run again, princiy the candidate of the Standard oil company | and some other great moneyed powers. Well, it takes votes to elect presidents, and there are several votes that are not for sale. great accident. will probably weather we need not expect a rev until the first great accident next winter. THE PRESIDENT HAS VETOED the bill to assist | the drought-ruined Texan farmers by supply. ing them with seed from the go stores. He finds no warrant for co stitution. We could hardly have lelieved that our constitution was such a narrow-souled little instrument as to have forbidden it.— Albany Times. There is nothing in the constitution to war. rant droughts or earthquakes. That is a startling fact that ought to be considered too, HANDLE THEM TENDERLY. It cost the man Unger twenty years in prison to lose the head of the man he killed, the head being the only thing necessiry to prove his story of self-defence; but if the head had been found it might have cost him his life. One can't be too careful in handling the heads of other people. He had better let them alone altogether. In some cases it is more than he can do to take proper care of his own. They have a ‘dress improver” in London, the same being a bustle, and when the wearer of it sits down it plays ‘God save the queen.” Why the queen should be in such imminent danger on these occasions of rest is not ex- plained. Surely the wearer doesn’t propose to THEATRICAL POSTER OF THE DAY- “Jim the Penman.” icbooks.com