Judge — January 1, 1887 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

SOME DAYS THEREAFTER. Y gracious ! I remember Many Christmases forlorn, The ghastly way in which the bills Came pouring in each morn; They never, never ceased to come, And I recall to-day EY sust how I often wished thenight Would bear my breath away. I remember, I remember The slippers blue and white, Embroidered o'er with roses Most unnaturally bright. Each year my wife presents them, And I thank her with asmile ; While inwardly I wonder If she’s bought them with my “ pile.” I remember, I remember, How my angry passions rose When my last year’s gift to Bridget Was received with tilted nose; My language was not loud but deep— Alas ! on Christmas gay Iam further off from heaven Than on any other day. ELEN THORNE, his pockets, took the last ticket, and was given the first chance with three weatherbeaten dice which O’Rafferty handed over in a pint cup. He threw 33, and after intense excitement, during which the other holders of tickets struggled without avail to beat him, was awarded the Guinea hen and started for the door. “ Hol’ on, dar!” ‘* Wha’ is yo’ gwine, Mistah Jones ¢” and other cries brought Hooter toa halt and the query, ‘‘ W’y—wiat’s de ’stu’- bance, gem'n 7” O'Rafferty, on the announcement of the result, had got behind his bar, and the assemblage had made in its direction. “Did yo’ ebbah win a fowl at a raffie befo’ widout consolin’ de un- lucky, Mistah Jones ?” queried Johnson. “Dat’s hit,” remarked one of the rafflers who had thrown aces. “Yez wud do well, me bucks, to hit the ball,” put in O'Rafferty, with a suspicious movement toward a mallet lying on a cracker barrel. Fo' de Lawd, gem'n, I ain't got a cent in my clo’,” said Hooter. Oi'll resave the hin tull yez pay the shot,” said O'Rafferty, and without more ado he strode out and took the trophy from Hooter, who ELYSIUM. HARD ON THE OLD GIRL. Mrs, Hanpsome (to her young husband)—“ Um ! If you call that young snip of a baker's girl pretty, Iam not very far behind.” Mr. H.—" Wall, Lize, I'm afraid you'd have to run pretty darned hard to catch her, that’s all, relinquished it with a sigh and joined the crowd at the bar. Cider, whisky and gin were nominated to the value of $1.15. Hooter drank the cider and escaped. Snoring Johnson slipped out in his wake. O'Rafferty resumed the grocery business. The others joined Old Choc- olate by the stove. He had been an unprejudiced observer, and re- marked: “*Rafflin’, gem’n, ‘peahs to be a consid’ble frolic fo’ dem as doan’ win. De great trouble wid de mos’ ob us am a too limber 'magination. We wants toe git suffin’ fo’ nuffin’. We allus look fo' boot in a trade lat awtah be eben. Yo" mus'n't’spec’ fo’ toe haavest sweet 'tatahs wha’ plant aatichokes. Deacon Hootah Jones dun laan a lesson dis ebenin’ dat awtah be wuff a hundred cents on de dollah toe him. He wanted fo’ toe git dat Guinea hen fo' a song an’ de Guinea hen got him. I nebbah see a man yit dat didn’ hab toe weah out one pair ob fool's shoes, an’ de mos’ ob us am lucky ef we doan’ git de secon’ pair half soled an’ heeled. Dis yer 1 yah yo dat need refawmin’ shud take hol’ ob yo'selves by de coat collah an’ yank yo'selves up on hiah groun’, | I doan’ see a man befo’ me dat doan’ drink w'enebbah he kin git de likwid er gam’le w'enebbah he er got ten centser been dreemin’, Some ob yo' ull walk half a day twall yo' meet a mooly cow, a red waggin’, an’ a one-eyed dog so dat yo’ kin make up a policy gig, an’ yo’ doan’ strike a dollah in de policy shop no offener dan lightnin’ strikes a hay- stack. Ef yo’ ud spen’ half de time an’ fo’ per cent ob de conjurin’ on a job ob wuck, yo’ might weah patent leathah shoes an’ eat yo! vittles | widout wondahin wha’ yo' kin fin’ anoddah groc'ry dat keeps a slate.” And Old Chocolate left the grocery with a sniff of contempt and the carriage of a fugleman. J. A. WALDRON, 1Ramp—* Jerusalem {how I'd like to be inside for just filteen minutes.” comicbooks.com