Judge — September 25, 1886 — page 3: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

This is what pictorial advertising knife or the bludgeon of the man who means murder, This Kansas pedler of reformatory cant is perhaps not in the employ of the com- mon enemy, but he serves that purpose to’ the xtent of his sm nd his brief but ged Maine comy use he professes to hi he could gratify hy | malice and his yearn- ing for self Whether good people want this kind of mock profession and genuine treachery is a question that they will answer to suit them- selves: butas a general thing the utterances of the exhorter who devotes much of his tim to the art of the assassin are not to be greatly relicd upon and are far from instructive. THOSE DREADFUL MEXICA) There is talk of further revolution in Meai- co, and the cry of the revolutionists is ** Down with Diaz.” It would be rather pleasant just now to have our southern neighbors enter into: that kind of business. They have played up- on the courage of Uncle Sam until he is del- uged with the ory assurance, and he has not the disposition to resent his humiliation ; and if they would go to work to destroy each other he would at least have the satisfaction of knowing that they might receive the retribu- tion which they deserve and he chooses for ex- tra prudential reasons not to confer There is this good thing about those Mexi- They are idle when they are not at war and they are vicious at all times when they are not asleep ; but they destroy one another with neatness and dispatch when they have the requisite opportunity. In doing that the atone for a great deal of their superfluous v: i the same time that they relieve their neighbors of the great moral duty of teaching cans. THIRTEEN. Somebody rebukes “thirteen” clubs, and the rebuke is deserved. There is nothing to command respect in the superstitions which are of which the reader doubtless has one nd has sense enough as well shamed of them; but the * humor” jokes with death and dares disaster is not so much the mellow eccentricity that brings laughter as the coarse bravado that ripples shallowness and outrages common sense, These *‘ thirteen” men of loud manner and voice do not point their fingers so much at hu- man folly as at the inevitable destiny. They assume to laugh at superstition, but they are really challenging the mysterious approach of 3 unlikely to reach the proportic seribable thing called a boom. Shall you pluck figs from thistles, or feath- ers from turnips, or votes from the hill that is supposed to be sacred to the nourishing potato? Lat us not answer too soon. SOME TEMPERATE TEMPERANCE, beverage is of the same materia as that of the other days of the week, and quite as pronounced in its effects; but it is a sacred beverage, after the manner of the sacred Sunday concert, and you get it by application (through the sacred family entrance. While | you are soothing your soul with it you discover that others are taking their religion in the same way. Presently you may observe that the women of the neighborhood, if it happen to be a not particularly good one, are as devout as you are, They take their devoti home in all sorts of curious pacukges, the same being an ap- parent improvement on the ordinary growler, They come with baskets and cans and cologne- bottles, and ye of them have been known to utilize the receptacle usually employed for the accommodation of bonnets. ‘Their faith and their trust in. the doctrine of redemption are thus disguised to some extent—more so than the bibulous psalm which the worshiper at the lordinary table has partaken of and which sends him out of the sacred ly entrance in aggering conditi Directly it appears that the small boy and girl are worshiping too, or rather they are taking home to the older people the means to devotional exercises. Salvation of this kind is more free on the sacred Sunday than on any of the other days, and they who partake of it are extravagant in their demon- strations of appreciation, There is an anti-saloon movement. os prohibition, for that i | THE POLITICS OF THE PATENT MOWER. fond If a farmer were to go to Albany to instruet | iudorse it in all its le the governor with regard to the Management| Tyee HAS BEEN an earthquake shock in of state affairs we should have a fineexhibition Ohio. It strikes us, come to think of it, that of incongruity. At first glance it scems to be| jokes about carthquakes are ghastly—and we equally curious to see the governor going |<ay this by no means because Ohio is a Re- |through the rural districts to instruct the | juplican state. \farmer with regard to agriculture ; but never- j theless many excellent ideas are advanced by statesmen to the rural world, and on the other hand a great deal of shrewd polities has con from the rural mind for the benefit of politic managers. But the county fair is mostly for exhibi |purposes. The agricultural address me |amusement quite as much as instruction, the best bill draws the largest attendance. | politician talks of the best method of ri jcorn by way of a subtle suggestion as to the best way to produce votes; and when he speaks. of the noble pumpkin, locating it on the vine} that is more naturally devoted to grapes, or of the inviting cucumber, placing it among the peaches that blush in unconscious resistance to such strange company, he means | |no harm and is merely bespeaking for himself! |the popularity that he must have in order to win in a larger and gi field of action. | As between fishing and the agricultural dress wisdom lies wholly on the side of the lat ter. Grover Cleveland comes b: tion'with his face browned and bitten and swol- | len, as if he had been an active participant in Democratic caucus; while our little governor, however the aqueduct business may eventuate, lis lifted to the clouds by the wind of the agricultural address, which may eventually | |approach the majesty of a cyclone and is not! of the unde- in our daily papers has come to. |the visitor who comes like |to come at any: time. afraid of him, but if t jof assumption to that called-for disrespe: jesty of control over eve is vulgari If it is not as bad that it is childishness. It is ‘really not courageous to drink from a miniature skull or to eat from |diminutive coffin. It is repulsive, and t | word covers the entire bill of fare There are times when men in a spirit of despair can hur- rah with a certain grimness of jocularity for ‘the next who dies ;° but the “thirteen” in- |dividuals who roar over the separation of body nd soul and sing over the things which bring tears to other eyes have utterly mistaken the meaning of wit and the purpose of humor. There is no fun there. It is the emptiness of mockery and the vapidity of insincerity. thief and is liable | Probably they are not is so there is no need It is wholly un- r that has the living thing. It It is not impossible, but regula- We should think there could be no ra- vocate of temperance who would not th and breadth, ve ns nd The A new play illustrated, comicbooks.com r