Judge — September 11, 1886 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

15 THE FOR “Sulphur Soap” secured by Lettera Patent. HOW TO GET A HEALTHY AND PEARLY SKIN. A lot of develop int cleansing and purifying agent is everywhere recognized, and there is nothing that will equal | GLENN'S SULPHUR SOAP ‘as an external application; used in the bath and the toilet regularly, it | will soon free the skin from all imparities, inducing lithe, firm tlesh, and a skin as clear and smooth as satin. 25¢. a cake; three cakes for | 75 cents, cake. | iHill’s Kills Corns Ask for Ger Beware of imitations, Observe the name C. SulphurSoap GERMAN CORN REMOVE while attempting to shoot a cat one night several years since.—Fstelline Bell. ‘A successful packer has just built a neat house on one of the avenues and moved into it. His wife has had on hand for some time the task of furnishing it in appropriate style. Among other things she purchased a_number of paintings of a down town ¢ Recently she astonished a caller by exhibiting a copy of the “Mater Dolo- rosa,” and saying, ‘This is the ‘Dura Mater,’ you know."Chicago News, A phy sa} and infectious sults from kissing. The worst disease contracted by the young man who devotes several nights a ek to the labial exercise is palpitation of the rt, which frequently terminates in a violent ase of matrimony. That is less dangerous, but more expensive, than either tuberculosis or diph- theria, And it hangs on longer, too.—Norris- town Herald. A little girl, who had been told that when it was thundering it was God talking, was out on the lawn ‘one day not long ago, playing with her dolls. called to little Alice to hurry and come in, She began picking up her playthings, but before she had got them alt it thundered, when she ex- claimed, ‘Oh, Dod, don’t raise such a fuss and scold so. I'm hurrying fas’ as I can.”"—Cinein- nati Inquirer. The Estelline fire company was called out in great haste at about 4o'clock yesterday afternoon by a conflagration raging in Big Sioux river, west of here. The run to the river was made in four: and one-half minutes, and by hard work the fire was extinguished after about six rods of the river had been totally destroyed. No insurance. A man has been hired to draw water down ina bar- rel and repair the break. It is expected that navigation will be resumed ina few days. —Estel- line (D, T.) Bell. that tuberculosis, diphtheria OUR MODERN CHILD. “« Elsa, what are you doing with that book—you are not going to read it?” “Of course not, Clara. I found it in mamma's room and brought it away, as I thought it an im- proper book for her to read.” —Fiiegende Blatter. 3 are all possible or actual re- | Her mother, seeing a storm coming up, | FAMOUS SKIN REMEDY AND BEAUTIFIER. USE IN THE TOILET AND BATH. people (infants and adults) are troubled with humors which 10 unsightly blemishes on the skin, The value of sulpbur as a or sent by mail on receipt of price and 5 cents extra for each N. Crittenton, Sole Proprietor, 115 Fulton St., N. Y. on each packet, without which none tx genuine. Hair and Whisker Dye d Bunions. Beware of the man Corn BLACK AND 1 BROW any poor Immitations. over and take no other. It hasno equal A GENTLE REMINDER. + ymin | | Well, good-bye, Jones—I've had a} | Brow: time in Paris, It all seems to me like | splend ream.’ JoNEs—‘So it would to me, old man, if you were to pay methat twenty dollars you borrowed.” “Has Smith sued Jones?” asked a lawyer of a Dakota justice of the peace whom he met on the street: ‘ Yes, he has commenced suit for |$25—the case will be heard next week.” * Will |he be likely to get it?” ‘Get it? Well, I should say he would. I know all about the matter. Jones has owed that about two years, I entered judgment against him just as soon asSmith came in.” “But you haven't heard the defense yet.” “Defense nothing! Don't want to hear it. “It is time Jones paid it and the costs are on him now.” —Estelline Bell, JUST SO. Iepoe’s picture of Cleveland refusing the sol- dier's widow a pittance from the national bar'l and then dealing out $14,000,000 to river and har- bor jobbers is a peculiarly happy hit.—Canajo- harie Courier. a ‘THE BEST IN THE WORLD, W. E. Wass of Medad City, Idaho, writes in renewing his yearly subscription to the JUDGE, “It is the best paper of its kind in the world.” THE MODERN SHAKESPEARE. “Be these not melting moments, sweet my love?” “So saith our ‘weekly laundry bill, my lord.” “It doth my soul array against the solar ray, and I do semblance now thy pa were he equipped with specialties of Job. “Wherefore, sweet boy?” “Tam parboiled !” ‘‘ Out, ‘orrid punster! tho’ in sultry. time insult me not with metaphor like that!” “Then I'll belike me to a vernal chick that sheds its plumage—I am molten, gyerl.” “Ye gods! —Incinerate this gurgling clown that doth in sin orate. Brand himasone that maketh summer more like simmer time. But stay, Hen- rico! let's a truce to t and tell me of this | Mercury—this wretch that doth at will adjust a of Jupe? He was a messenger in 'wayback times whose duty ‘twas to tote demis-ed souls into the roasting realms of Beelzebub. — The functions of this task did'st fit him so that’s he's acquired a patent on the job, and tho’ he cannot there decoy the quick, he doth at times import a little hell and set it up convenient for our use.” ‘A very monster, is he not, my lord? And was he wor- shiped like the other gods?’ “Aye, damosel, he was. In ancient Greece he was held warmly in the nation’s heart.” ‘So, sayst thou? Then Thardly marvel much that there is now so little left of Greece !"—Yonkers Gazette. “Save us, Henrico, but there's jeopardy prowl- ing in every corner o' the land.” “Go to, thou sweet alarmist thou, go to!” “Nay, an’ I ga'ge the times, I give thee truth.” Feed me thereof, good dame, for truth is sweet; as sweet as rare; as rare as” ‘Need of it? Anoint thee, knave ; thy taste is vitiate’ and craving naught of truth thou find’st it not. But stay! T'll feed thee of this jeopardy. "Tis writ the senators have had their joust and now are scattered broadcast o'er the land “E’en so,Andromeda! But wherein jeopardy o” that?” “The jeopardy? Great Cesar! But thou'st taught me day by day, and constant is it uttered in the prints, that these same senators are varlets all—knaves, recreants, leeches, conscienceless— and can this flood of sin o'erwhelm the land and not breed poison i’ its coursing blood 7” “Tush thee, sweet maid! thy wit’s askew. Trade it for logic and ‘twill tell thee this. These bold, bad men—these scurvy senators—that annual din the forum with alarm, are what we'll term the nation's scavengers, the cleansers of our body politic. Like certain globules of the human blood that, taking to themselves the flesh’s ill, do merge them at one suppurating point and leave the body purified thereby, 80 do these hon- orable gentlemen. Theirs is a sacrificial task, fair gyerl—this being infect’ at local bailiwicks ‘with all the crude corruptions of the state and bring- ing all these taintures to a head—and when from focus point they do retreat, our country filtered with their breaking out, we should praise God that we are disinfect’ and ‘think no longer hen of jeopardy. "—Yonkers Gazette. EPPS’S QRATEFUL—COMFORTING. the : COCOA DAVIDSON TAILORS. Gor. Beekman & William Sts., NEw Torx. & GO., GEORGE WEST, GROCERS’ BAGS, BALLSTON SPA, New York. ARKELL & SMITHS, MANUFACTURERS OF FLOUR SACKS, _CANAJOHARIE, N. Y. a eer, av reer. <——JoSEPH P. FELT & Co.——> ELECTROTYPERS, No. 25 Rose Stacey, NEW YorK. METAL PLaTee rom Ewonavens 4 Sprciacry. VICTORIA HOTEL, One of tho largest and most complete hotels tn the city ly renovated and almost entirely refurnisbed. Rooms je. Cuisine unexcelled. Conducted on the ‘American and faropean plan. Practically fireproof. |Hades here?” “What, Mercury? the tickle son H. L. 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