Judge — June 12, 1886 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE. JUDG. PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. President - Vice President Department wero Manager - - Advertsing Manager ~ TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS UNITED STATES AND CANADA. 18 ADVANCE, ‘One copy, one year, or 2 numbers, ‘One copy, alx mo ‘One copy, for 13, THE weATHER being quite warm, perhaps it is true that Ira Davenport will marry after all. Ir WILL BE time enough to pardon James D. Fish after his term has expired—perhaps after the old man has expired hi uch given to airs, confer a degree ly not so bad. but the proposi upon the colleges is rea LET THOSE CANUCKS go on. Presently Unele Sam will cross the border and carry off all the American fugitives, and then they'll lose their best soc’ iety. THE HYPERCYCLOID of the ; ‘Sun says the edi- tor of the Syracuse Standard is a gasteropod. Is it as bad as that? We had looked upon him as nothing more serious than a hard-shell Baptist. Tie PUBLIC will be glad to know that in the fight between David Davis and his carbuncle the latter is going to be whipped. It is a very large carbuncle, but Mr. Davis isa very large man. G. CLEVELAND is not a suspicious man. Probably he t even aware that the I-am-a- Democrat villain still pursues him. He will i y, and he needn't credit his nce with it either. Senator Dorsey says Jeff Davis is * the flickering spark in the smouldering ashes of rebellion and secession.” This has been our opinion all along. We had intended to men- tion it. And by the way Mr. Dorsey 1s the flickering spark in the smouldering ashes of the star-route business. It is qi a coinci- dence. Tue Memphis Avalanche says there is not a sadder spectacle in America than Attorney- general Garland. This is a sweeping state- ment in view of the cyclones and hurricanes and floods that have devastated so much west- ern territory, and only the other day a man was hanged in Alabama and another shot himself in the northern part of this state, while two women recently eloped with as many men from a county in Indiana; and yet we suspect that the Memphis Avalanche can go to work and prove it. A DENVER PAPER says the division between the president and the mugwumps is complete. That between the gentleman and the Demo- cratic party being complete too, we should think, in order to capture a few friends, he ‘vould want to marry two or three times. Somesopy who has seen the Hon. William Maloney says that, contrary to recent reports, he isa steady, temperate man. Mr. Maloney may steal and help others tosteal, but he draws the line at the intoxicating bowl. Behold the truly excellent Mr. Maloney! Let us follow his noble example and we may be happy yet. THe Utica Herald ohs for an hour of Dan- iel Webster in the place now occupied by Mr. Bayard, and another paper ohs for the same amount of Andrew Jackson in place of Mr. Cleveland. But the owing of Canada for the outrage to the American flag is more to the point; there is money in that, and the longer it draws interest the more there will be of it. CUAUNCEY Ml. DEPEW. The work and the works of Chauncey M. Depew are known everywhere, and as JUDGE is not given to biography, especially such date and detail as are already familiar, it contents itself with presenting the features of Mr. De- pew in its gallery of illustrious citizens. An abler or amore versatile man cannot be re- called at this moment. If he wereon the stage he would be everything appertaining thereto, from general utility to heavy villain, and from that to lightning tragedian; and at a pinch he would assume the part of soubrette and look us dainty and sing as sweetly as if he belonged Mr. Depew fails in only a few un- nt respects. He is not a society man, aturally diffident, and he can't make after-dinner speeches, He is a lawyer, but he has been out of general practice for some time owing to his inability to present his cases with strength and elegance on paper and before the courts. It was partly for this reason that he became advisory counsel to the Central rail- road, and eventually the president of the road, He is not a politician and he never, never wanted to go to the United Statessenate. Asa railroad man, a theologian, a philosopher and a poet he is a lamentable failure, and as a good fellow he will probably not be elected, But’he is handsome and wholesome, and not- | withstanding the shortcomings briefly enumer. ated, and perhaps some others which may be presented in-a later edition, he will probably manage to get along. THE RULING PASSION. Every man isawkward in the place with | which he is not familiar, and his awkwardness generally furnishes a suflicient excuse for treating him as a stranger and taking him in. The guileless farmer visits the city to be made the victim of the adventurer of the street, and is not altogether wel in every the home of the city cousin; but his greenness is not greater than that of the city cousin when he goes out into the country, and the contempt visited upon the latter because of his ignorance of egrieul tural bet and Sey is not al action and counter features of the Chri wonls of the genuine article of good soc As to the ruling passion, however—we al- lude, of course, to the passion for making money—there is very little difference between this section and that. ‘Put money in thy purse—honestly if thou canst, but put_ money in thy purse,” is an injunction that has come to us from the patriarchs and will go to our children and children’s children, brightening through the generations like the hard coin worn to thinness by its contact with respectful DEDICATED TO OUR COUNTRY COUSIN. Our artist has a three week's experience with those inquisitive rural, of his fel conceives an invention for the protectic hand-shaking fiends, and low citizens, comicbooks.com