Judge — April 3, 1886 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE. Lvertising Manager Furpanice W, Nosrmasp T ZRMS TO SUBSCRIBERS UNITED STATES AND CANADA. Re tes Weents each, | Farser— By jimine ‘THE JUDGE PUBLISHING CO. rmainain! estan, 2.x. - that nature—but if he try to put his poetry in verse, or in prose for that matter, he is very How these yere be T guess.” John A lent an is an novella hen hetaileite orvile Tt ig| much worse, Poetry harnesses itsown horse Abrepandee sevaay ot ‘ides its o ay, and a ec Is of most unfortunate that he has not continued |*®4 Fides its own way, and all the wind: Hheaven put together are not half as sweet or the'opportunity:19 Hndout half as lawless. It is the air, the wind, the 1 Tue Star charges John A. Logan with bad | horse, the rose, the thought, the it r, and then says, ** General Logan has | all things in one ridiculous cc pation— nbination, | gram Sten been charged with forgetting that the|and nothing in anything or in all of them to- Fl] War had ceased twenty years ago.” There are|gether. What is poetry ? On second thought i , i} indications that the Star's mansion in the) We donot know. We are sorry we spoke \ niches ie coma poset pritcipelly of; glams Tue Rev, Sam Jones asked that those of an i e JUDGE has the utmost respect for | audience of 4,500 girls who attended one of his i) Conkling as a gentleman and an ad-|meetings in Chieago who had spoken in an and trusts that he will get so rich| ugly way to their mothers should stand, and hair in his head will be encrusted | not a girl arose. If a girl had arisen she i with priceless jewels; but as a political leader | Would have been a fool. If Mr. Jones doesn't t} f he is unavoidably the man who ought to be| know any better than to ask a young lady to | somebody else. make a spectacle of herself, in such a way or es . any other way, he is very def FEW mon say more good and wise things tain things that it should be his first business tha M. Depew. A little speech oft Jean. Guilt in small things doesn't neces- | his recently made in answer to atheists and | sarily mean humiliation, and the mother of agnosties was as eloquent as anything ever the girlwho. might a tisl Wersall at presented by Colonel Ingersoll; and when he } says, referring to the labor agitation, “The ij only remedy that I can see is arbitration; let | itcome voluntarily if it can—if not by legis- lation,” he so adopts the wisdom as to | leave very little to be de { } . . 1 Sn} Somenopy asks the Herald to furnish him GROVER AND THE GRANDMOTHER. ; aa with a definition of the word poetry, Now| The April-fool joke of Grover C! | poctry, it seems tous, is the thing the young|all the year round. Like death—though it is | man and the young woman think and never, | funny enough—it hath all seasons for its own. | i never say or send to the newspapers. It is|The JupGE doesn’t pretend to say that the : the demand of Sam Jones to the most merci. less of all criticism would ve been excusable if she had taken the foolish creature into the room for private conference and subjected her to the persuasiveness of the switch. land runs | very sweet if thought, but is very flat if| smiling joker of the White house hasn't done i written. Poetry is the indefiniteness of the| all he consistently could for the grandmother j imaginable—or perhaps the barely imaginable | of Demotracy—the records presented by Mr. of the indefinite. The air is necessary to life, | Vilas and Daniel Manning forestall any such but one mustn't try to take it in hand and | foolish falsehood; but the aged woman hath analyze it, this section and that, Poetry is a| avarice in her aged eyes and would fain grasp thing to be let very severely alone, There all that is offered her, and as much more as is nothing prettier than a rose, but the most|she can conveniently or laboriously carry 1 careful fingers kill it when they take it from | Truth to tell, however, she has a right to all ; the stem to which it belongs. There have|she can get, and she adopted and reared the a been but five or six poets, and they are dead. uth with that proposition pl ' It is a very cheap man who isn't a poet at whatever the youth m: re ‘ heart—if he happen to havea something of| marked by way of mugwump or civil service MISTAKES WILL OCCUR. ots do creak! I'll have to grease ‘em upa little, It is a long time since her av: was gratified to any considerable the yearning for the stuffed pocket-book and the various spoils and honors that she onee monopolized is as proper as it is natural. We imagine, moreover, that the situation will be ly reversed some three years hence. At period the frisky gentleman will reach for the deceptive package and the grandmother will apply her bony fingers to the concealed string an nk it out of his sight. The old lady will then wear the smile and the other | party the astonishment and regret, and it will be the fair exchange that is no robbery. © xtent and diploma s belonging to life in a large y are great, but the penalties are equally | enormous. You live in a large city mostly for the purpose of sharpening your wits, and asthe wits are constantly rubbing against others | the process brings about a keenness of edge | that in some cases is marvelous. But the patient, plodding ordinary citizen who li | the life of one who wants to be honest and achieve honestly a respectable income is no | match for the man or the corporation that want five dollars for a dollar's value and that propose to make themselves rich in a quarter of the time that used to be devoted to that desirable end. Your gas company has taken to itself the airs and emoluments of the greater corporations, and wants sixty, seventy, a hun- dred per cent. profit, first watering its stock after the custom of the financial period. Your grocer is not satisfied with reasonable profits, but must needs give short weight and poor goods along with high prices. Your doctor | needs an income among the hundreds of thou- sands so as to be entirely respectable, whether he cures you or not. Your lawyer under- takes your case for a retainer of larger value than the sum in dispute, and his conscience perm n to accept the larger retainer wl the other party may be able to give, regardle: of the merits of the case in dispute. There is a craze for petty and large thievery {It is natural enough, perhaps, all men having a desire to get as much as they can comicbooks.com