Judge — October 3, 1885 — page 3: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

‘Tee FU) Et JUDGE; N AND PHILOSOPHY Observations by the German F By I A policoman has many queer experiences during a and down his post. Our German Policeman probably than other officer, but his keen se of hum abl appreciate the fun in life and his constant talk glibness of expre our opinion, He had been on duty all day whe Reilly, the blacksmith, washing up and mak near the door of the smithy. “Dem lawyers been def- fils-uf-fellers, eh?” the Ger- man Policeman inquired, nd then “Tyos mit a bolice court to-day, und a man vos up for sdealin on der oder site rv brisoner Gr topher Columt “*Aind [got some righds at all?’ der brisoner in- gwired. #4 Yos, shall been his lawyer. “<Bedder yon don’t. put dot on record,’ I hollerd owd to. der brisoner’s lawyer, “else dot lawyer on der oder site vill broof der brisoner sdole dem righds from some- poddy else, choost like broofed he sdole all der ri der dings vot he got. E rypoddy langhed oxcebt d chudge und der brison lawyer. * Silence, or L 1 up for condempt,’ chudg *« * Nopoddy got condempt for a goot choke,’ said I. “*Silence!? der chudge roared owd. “ «Dot seddles it,’ I say “you got der lasd vord.’” “1 choost et Justus chwab, der pig Communist,” sai . IT sayt to him: * You bee munist meedi: to-night, aind it?’ ed some seffen hundert laporers here py this dem all pelieve in me und Henry Chorge. ‘They vill « you haf, und dem brodected,’ said k you said Wer A TALE OF THE TELEGRAPH BOY. And the The light prose, gz speed (t) of the telegray a pocm doth after But “the quickest on record ful feat— just come to light, I will chronicle here 1 boy in ppear, —a wonde Eleven p. ., and the night clock jumped At the tick—tick—tick, Of the instrument i On his plate For the boy ont Who was § swindon ly thumped “An important me Tler husband is dead, And I'll break your head If you're more’n ten mii your feet, Five mini ites in reaching the strec Wi And you'll His book. . . . . . The morning comes like a beautiful d shim t ves ion that mak es th 1st, | The “dead husband lk up «Mas! said hun Dree sendimenc him that but is old friend y to go home, who shall say more pedder my pid- milkmao Which sec As it hurric And hollers, street with thi knob of the bell! And Tr extra pay— nd at the b vitsmarked C, 0. D. (\ SOLEMN PAUSE.) ok it;—the very first word der xty-four days dem der dr two-dollar pill und vote to continue der bresent iniquitons und cent brofits in peezness? ” und soul 364 days py der year. en 365 days py der year,’ I “sayt. Communist. ‘It is choost der same now. re mine und agree mit all my y is election day » mit der firsd bolitician vot gifs dema owdrageous sdade uf society.” ‘So efferydings goes mit der dogs, aind it?? I asked, “* Oh, no; not so pad as dot,’ sayt der Communist, “Lahtill keeba peer saloon und all dem two dollars comes righd avay into my bocket.” “T choost und der g city found a man his vife coming from ndry back, to open der house on’ der prown sdone end uf my beat,” the Policeman said, ‘again ‘shift- ing to another subject. Hat asblendid dime?’ I ired. ““*Ve haf to camb ing peen,’ der y “und ve meed- sayt, f hata scason uf much gra Ve haf peen lly plessed.? ‘Rind I glad to hear * Teayt, und den I pulled pit man to von site und him vot did der olt laty mean py snch a vay uf dalking like dot. “She means,’ sayt dot vicked olt man, ‘dot our eldest daughder has mashed arich young hardvare mer- chant und is going to got muarrit, und T haf solt two lots for $750 for vich I baid $100 dr r ago.” some goot is not still lefd in der Iretty. Der negst ding to religion is jence und vot shall make der gonscience son-in-law und sex-hundred und fifdy ber the neighborhood heard | A hand on the by | A scutile of feet Tn rapid ‘Tren sile cat— sweet, Trooded. Cure for Alcholism and Pugilism, An English doctor has discovered that nitro-glycerine has precisely the effects of spirits and can be given in liew of it. It John Sullivan could be induced to fill up on this substitute for whiskey the next time he is to be fooled with and some one could get near cnough to “ percuss” him, we might see a national nuisance abated, at last. Ordinary whisky, like ordinary pugil- ists, seems to have lost its power over John L. comicbooks.com