Judge — June 6, 1885 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE JUDGE. R EAU OF GENERAL ADVICE. ‘Twist, frizzle, pull, singe, oil, and—yes, supermost t. Pull ittight, uniil it loosens’ and falls out, Reinforce its luxoriance with Cireassian trophies or graveyard spoils. Do anything to banish the hideons grace fulness of nature. but sentimental, Fean hold out great hopes to y rowill probably sce the usual number of foreign noblemen Ton our friendly shore, and by judicious efforts you may secure one, as other muidens in all parts of the country secure them from time to time. It hus long been the eustem of sblemen to visit this country and travel incegnite from place to cach aecking some interesting and attractive, but cruelly un appre 1 young girl to carry ‘ to be th mansion. more complete, nd dukes and likewise their good manners at-home for safe keeping, a lofty scorn of the fundamental rules of grammar. Now if you are stylish and taferesting and especially—such are the eccentricities of gre: if you have a small sum of money bank, you stand iw fair captivating one of th patricians and receiving at friends will begin tu realize | Pay especial attention to your dr 1 your thoughts from the time when : ye hour When you shall lay aside this earthly garment « To be . ; I my were insdvertantly furmished with an inmertal soul, but You are, my heart ~ examples of what nature can :), sacruel inposition which, if tamely submitted to, might accomplish Ww malevolently sets to Work to create mon: — wreck all your love of frivolity : yen have, in all ag nations, recognized the fact The refc le ulliest y isnature, and as you live m the most en and under the most liberal government of t ! at ven should the van’ in this war a anmon foe. ‘Take this, then, as your mot will thwart nature is commendabl You need few instructions from my poor pon. Le : . fof your strong pe hich you have t A anil'te A is to be Vivacious, euraim be te us of applause, Nature ordained that you shonld wal) 0 iMe in a given time, without reference to me upon the bottoms of your vou therefore walk upon the ends | execution. T have seen the artonishing cher, Mayed in of your te Nature is thwarted, and a clean victory is scored for gymnostics by derand apparently celicute manten, . : y the the hearers were enchanted, is to speak with enlpable intended that your vital organs shanld hav y ness, "They were fairly + Un singing never use Uh ork in and that vou shonld thas always malty; sweet tunes which tne and seme wesk-headed amefully exorbitant ontl wlecanvas jackets. Victory! inlend ite tie [aes ‘ , Inve yet can pr he shrick of i hair of your hearers is vibrating to thrill, slides ne i : (on p suddenly tea 1 then before they ean catch their ly that after death th : a found — breath leap again to the high o eping up, meanwhile, a constant to be actually geidironed by. th Ne set Limpartial pawing of the h Trvall not take much of this to phrasee canto honor te such « Let hushed voices and | sitisfy the audience—satisfy them complet bared heals render the silent tr due to the memuties of such. Bat I, it seems presumptaons in Nature gned that vour hair should flow down your baeks in | » When even now sou can du all these oom teh letter thick, glossy, absurdly-beautiful tresses, Away with such barbarous | than I can describe them, AKTHUK M. CUMMINGS, schew all communication with your soul; let it sit in darkness and silence an pis reason to hope that *n time you may wholly rid you b encumbrance, , Uhistrious examples of women who have achieved th become, £0 far as we ean jud There was af Ie al Greer There was an oll liawver named Stout Drank forty " Went to have an aching to its any an gas kept a work! raven shrewd wink Anil the dentist kept jerking— er bea at the rink, And now he must gum it about Which meant:—1 am realy to el-o-pe. A better from Sony por he tanks mily fat and hellihy, but he wes abwase complaning about bein sik an sayrne New York Apral IL. sister ¢ aint feling verry wel ape W wondernt- Deer purtge put you wut ta mach LF word the a littl rast L hosunt cont yuu enny bettar lately eo tarky for dainer and sum oystars on he bof igs hos ben pritty dul at our house. 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