Judge — April 18, 1885 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE JUDGE. | ON THE ROAD. ing sleep, snored like a very Samson on the | in the aisle. knees of his Delilah. “What shall we do with it, boys.” Lasked, | ae ike 4 a Enisearion af are Uf course, Cusby and Brown had “got | +1’ give you each a half if’ you'll carry it low the Gentle Drummers Disported on > my scheme.” Lord! how livid the | it awa Themselves With the Railroad Bore. visage of tha old rooster grew, and how Give him dose of our great Mineral violently the hand which clutched’ my arm | Compound,” cried Gus, “it will cure con- 1 RerneseNtT Messrs. Bottom & Quince, | trembled as Cusby arose noiselessly from his | sum ption, re! form the civil service, remove of New York, whose labels and illuminated with eyes peeping eusningly over his , dand— printing [am introduciug to such busin shoulderatme. ‘I'he mouth of the demented All right,” cried Brown. — ‘** The Com- men throughout the country as I think | creature stretched until the bicuspids were pound will kill him dead and Ul work in ought to use them, My name is Lang—L. plainly visible as he grinned fiendishly. His | my Dr.Potterficld's Embalming Fluid on him L. Lang, at your service. gers were set to resemble the claws of a | —(reaching for his grip)—and will forward Josh. Brown, who travels in the interest of | bird. him to the bereaved friends, C. O. 1). war- the Western Union Coffin & ranted to keep in any cli- Casket Ce id Gas Cusby, the mate gentlemanly representative of “Come off, Josh.,” 1 inter- Pydia Linkham’s Mineral Com- rupted, * this case is mine, and I pound,” and I pulled out of Cleve- am going to try plain ordinary land together last Monday. The water. The old cock looksas if he wasn’t used to that element, and judging by his nose it will prob- ably surprise his nervous system with good results.” For the first time that I ever heard of, the consulting physi- ans disagreed with the doctor in charge; and we emptied the con- ! tents of the water cooler over the prostrate man. ‘The treatment resulted as I had expected. He gradually regained the use of his faculties, and after smoker was well filled. —§ My friends occupied the seat in front of me while | was paired off with an old gentleman of full habit, rbutic as to complexion and bibulous of feature, the odor of whese breath informed me that ad taken adrink before taking tin. He belonged to that variety of the hun pecies, the ational bore—as I quickly ned without effort. He informed me fully of his business, then propounding the conundrum return of confidence. in such eases, viz: ** Where 1 to make things hot Sys » | : +” begged to be assisted to for him, And this ishow Tdid it: 7 : another car. * You would not guess, sir, to look at me Brown also performed his part acceptably, | When he conductor, alarmed by the that Lam a keeper ina lunatic asylum. You though rather too wildly, by jumping nimbly reports of the d the two gentlemen seated b upon the back of his seat where he balanced the smoker, ompanied by several brake- fore ua for raving maniacs—now would yor himself with arms extended, his fingers work- men miscellaneously armed, he found thre Great Casir!” ejaculated the old gentle | ing nervously and his eyes rolling in an, quiet inoffensive gentleman engaged in man, starting violently. rming manner. He rendered his perform. game of draw with $2.00 in the pot, as go Fact, sir. ‘They look tame enough, ance the more realistic by growling like a asa pair of jacks being required to open. don’t the: This man (indicating Cusby) disturbed lion—all of which, he afterward in- _ in his milder moments imagines himself a formed me, was his idea of the invariable Prison Reform. milk-can, and, being by nature as honest a manner in which all professional madmen | —— man as ever breathed, he never adulterates disport themselves when on exhibition. Mr. Warner's able his contents with water, I must admit, though, that I haveseen the various component parts of an or- thodox milk punch emptied into him with privity and convenience. “The first symptom of insanity the other man showed was a trick of going to pawnbrokers all over town to get himself hung up, under the impression that he was awatch, — Ilis trouble is that he is continually running down and requires to be wound up per 1 passengers, entered article on Management, in the Review, informs us that the state prison at Wethersfield, Cont “altogether a gloomy and depress- and that the Rhode nd state prison, though new handsome granite building,” is no more desirable as a summer resort. But the case is not as hard everywhere as it seems in New Engl: If Mr. W. will extend *rison his prison visitations to. this city lly, ina manner very agre he will find that the inmates have to himself. When he has kept cheerful, even wsthetic surroand- time for an hour, if the winding-up process is not promptly attended to, he breaks his main spring, smashes his crystal, and that is the time we have to put a chain on that watch and lock it. This time-piece, between windings, makes the fastest sixty minuteson shall’ no more soil their hands record. Now as we find it nece: ry to give The other occupants of the car at this | with work, have, by a master stroke, tuken one man water to drink occasionally, and as began to manifest an impulse to seck more the last tion to a stay there. we can’t always be winding up the other with | refined associations than the smoking car Mr. Warner will not be surprised rye whiskey—his favorite key—the padded ffords: and when Cusby with a the attendance at these popular cells are a necessity. most ‘terrific shrick darted into’ the aisle resorts is rapidly increasing and now numbc “You mightn’t think it, but I can con- followed clos by Brown, a stampede | over 15,000 in this stat ll of whom much ; trol them, as men do wild beasts, by merely followed and the jam which occured at the enjoy the well-earned rest which the grand f keeping my gaze fixed on their eyes. ‘To doors was frightful. A minute or more old Empire State affords its favorite sons. show you how easy this is, I will relax my elapsed before the corner was broken and = i vigilance and turn them loos No trouble the market relieved. ‘ue wild western criticiam of Cleveland —don’t protest, it’s only a slight return for a ur own efforts to entertain me to-da; he has never crossed the Mississippi is apologies, my dear sir. Now watch * He doesn't have to, He does not T covered my for the ye ings.‘ Prison reform” has been at work since the days of Tweed, and Brussels carpets and terrapin stew frequently alleviate the lot of the involuntary boarder. ‘The free and intelligent voters of this state, by ordaiming that its guests The two ‘mani: ” now reduced to perfect No | submission by the eagle eye of their keeper, m. turned their attention to their victim, who yes with my hand, and feign- , had judiciously fainted and tay on his back = comicbooks.com