Judge — June 21, 1884 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

| IL car conducthor. Now he may call himself any name he plazes, but meself knows the rapscallion, Deny Mullins is his thrae name. And if 1 was in Amerikay there wouldn't be a Mallinsin the Shtate of New York but Pd pull the wizend out of, And he goes by O'Callahan ont there does he? I know his marks and tokens. Ie cive me, I was three y n New i stant ridher in the sthreet cars, 1 found the work too savare and came back to the ould counthry, so VL give you my mind about the same conducthors. Whin you git into ear with thim fellows they’re full impu- denter than Glidstone or it Arthur would be if they got into like auth They considher themselves boss of the and ov ivery man in it, Vit was m gave wan of thim a rite surprise one evenin, T met in with a friend just out from the ind he had smuggled out a ould counth 1 potheen, and he'd be to uste it. OF eT wouldn't ¢ him, and for ould times sake [ had nadhue for it, and L wished me throte mile | so that Low taste it the way goin™ n Will, afth over, F'shtepped into one of them us T didn’t want nme soul, and when I'd be apt to kil yed me, beyant all one But, sure enull, | box, and whin the nandin? my fare, wan cint to the good, 1 tuk and ked his hat off btep whin no wan was lookin’, him out of theear, [thin filt it todo his work mesilf bein’ the eausc So [ put his hat on me head gh the car collectin’ the nd noone axed to pass any. re- only T heerd wan lady whisper to that the conducthor was. tipsy. one more irriverent re- this car you go.” And that their i wan till it ve a bol the crime of murdher They asup of likor in, omadhown that ann of th condhactho found meself in the re rd kem round hortest road kne another put them all at wurrd more they s occurred to mel mite have throuble with the dhriver at the ind of the road. 1 shtepped out in front accordingly and thrated him the same as and then tuk the reims in-my And we went like the wind, for I the shtep lively and shtood for no one. time it w in y live with such ) horses then les where the take us, but couple of p shtopped the yoke the ce own bustes By this , but we went that ne of wet the ves got, only irivin to over- hadn't gone far when a a the horses heads and but by this time the ex- citement had me sobered, and the pollis, God help them, were that shtout and full bodied they couldn't run a yard. 1 med off with 90 cints in me pocket and some expayrience gained. And that was the first and last time I iver officered as conducthor, and I niver br sthraw for the po: that thim fellows » women bully the other fools in the cars are no good in raal fight, whin such offers. Tell O'Callahan if iver | return to look out for me, for [ won't lavea car in New York but Vil ride in till F meet him, and then we'll close our conthroversey and Ul sind him home a subdued man to that dacent wife of his, for she was one of the Mulcahy’ site too for him, and I wint near st pin in and relavin’ her meself, only for a difference of opinion her father and. meself had about at drain and a suckin’ calf. ivll show barely on their | and a | THE JUDGE. A BARBEROUS BARBER. nert time, You see, Lh is your car on the wed Which caused me to kill her brother, Pethe the day he bruk ime head, J left. me se me mind beyant twe Jin the A but it done me no injury in th iymore than they put me new silver nd ae mate fi r, bad luk to it, don’t grow T had to buy ould Farrel's his death, h his wife ld and. If vou wish for further par- ticulars addbre rr cover to me uncle in Cork. tv to Number One and O'Donovan Rossa, and all enquirin’ frinds, So, no more at prisint, from Your obedient sarvent, Patunterx O'Siea. year in payment of a wager. " tthe ‘Tur briny dee 4 salt mine. Fricutrun Crasu—i office towel. printing Many of these cynical old maxims are -cut SWS. A Goop many “amusements” are bores; but fishing is reel fun, Tue issues of the day—the daily papers, Barner (to new customer)—“ Good day, sir! L quite yot the ran of your face yet. Call again; give you easier shave by the way, there (THE MILLION DOLLAR PRIZE COMPETITION.) Red Haired Larry, the Terror of the Spanish Main. IN FOUR AGONIES, is the Author of “The man, what are you going to The speaker was a light’ lad r summers (goodness only knows of how many falls), He was richly ‘clad in the most stylish garments of the fi ting a youth of the period. three feet in his stocking: hero, Red Haired Larry the Terror of Avenue A. The person our hero was out tally to in large quantities was his old man, who wanted his darling son to become a poor varson on a measly salary of $1,000 per ann. \ itno, Larry knew too much for that; he was no chicken, you can bet your life on that. do about i Agoxy IL shave passed since the above took place. It is now midsummer. In the tropics far away in the distance is seen a handsome and stately craft of about 400 tons »proaching although there is hardly f wind (except what we have here). The gallant craft still glides quickly on. As she comes nearer a fine, stalwart figure is scen walking the deck of the main’ poop. comicbooks.com