Judge — March 15, 1884 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THROUGH o: (If thrills can fly, s heart a thrill should ty at all), May not one heave responsiv And seek to know the reason why And if, perchance, The thrill doth fh And he doth sight a soft dark eye (lt can such an eye recall), Should prove to be the reason why ‘brill did fly, that caused the »\ ‘The soft dark eye Then, caused the si But all dark oy Do not cause sighs; Else all brunettes would thrill one through, And the that sighs alone for you have anything else to do sigh for all girls who couldn't wear blue. Very awkward ‘twould be if this were true Awkward, perhaps, So I never shall know the reason why I traced my sigh to your dark eye, Unless you tell me, bye and bye to the Land League in the they did will enuff, but since they arroived at Castle Gairdin their characthers have not been worthy of imitaition. “How air you Pat?” sez they, saw who oi w: ** Oi know yes not,” Wid that the: thim intired th “* Now Pathrick ( if yez pl Ye ould counthry whin they sez oi. roared aloud, and wan uy air, while the other said, ‘allahan, none uv yez airs, know us, and we'se afther knowing yersilf. ‘Tuk me advoice now, and don’t yez be afther seeing fwhat transpoires whoilé O’Dwyer’s insoide tha But befoar he'd finished shpakin, the bauld shpalpeen wid me own pocket book that wan av the wimm within hergrasp. She yille it from her hands; thin all the other wimmin comminced to yill, and O'Dwyer and his companion esheaped wid aise. Thin the wimmin commine acop, but no cop appaired for siviral blocks. Thin whin they'd got him aboord, they awl began to talk at wance, and divila worrud could he undershtand. I thin shtated the fax uv the case in aclaira to howl fur to him n sinsible manner, surprissin, av course, enny information that wad be injoo- rious to mesilf or me two counthrymin. He saw at wance he cud do no good, wid a shly wink at me, he tuk adeshcription av the lost pocket book, but its shmall comfort the woman will ivir git out uv that. She croid and tuk on, till she lift the c and oi wid the rist uy ‘the ladies exy me regrit for {what hed occurred. divil a bit I caired awl the same, for I soon found out she was English, and its the E) lish I do be afther despoisin. She sed she ‘d only bin over a short toime, and that pocket book contained awl the money she had. (Nore.—Nixt toime I see O'Dwyer, oi’ll forgit me social position long enough to foind out {what amount av money that purrus con- tained. Begorra he'd betther be pritty civil, or oi’ll insist on his divvying wid me!) Tasve talk—“ Pass the butter. What myst d monotonous, too. al charin therein doth lie— What charm doth lie In your dark ¢ 19 Twonie Pen Pictures from the Poets. SHAKESPEARE THE GALLERY. “Swerer are the uses of the ragged little urchin remarked, his stick of for a penny world. “Witat’s your's, and what is your's mine”“—the burglar facetiously observed as he dropped lightly from the window, and made off with the silverware, ao % ‘Wuat’s in a name —remarked the sportsman; ‘that which we call a skunk, by iny other name would smell as bad;” and he hurried through the woods with a grip upon his nose which he didn’t relax until he wa as half a mile away from the obnoxious odor, adversity ”- licking andy, which he had just bought I'the money he ‘had in the “Tony, or not toby, that’s the question "— iloquized the old toper, with an affection- look at the little jug. ‘* Yes, it is ‘to be” —drunk;” and nipping and an contents at a sing wer air, he disposed of the breath, “Sweets to the sweet "—as the lovesick swain tenderly murmured as he handed the ice-cream to his girl. . : * “Very like «a whale ”—cried the urchin, rubbing himself, after the schoolmaster had put away his rod. * s,s j “Bot me no buts ”—as the man exclaimed as he took to his heels with the ram after him, . “ Ace cannot wither her, nor custom stale her infinite variety—of vituperative powers” —as Mr. Oldhusband confidentially remarked | toa friend about the partner of his bosom. . one “Anp makes us rather b have, than fly to others t ur those ills we we know not of” —the obstinate man gave as an excuse for | not seeing a doctor. . ote ‘aising it to his lips, with a | | tremendous thwack “He has eaten me out of hous nd home ”—as the bee complained when coming k to the hive, and finding the honey all me, ° CAN call —said old Mr, I the depths of a jug of old ry And an I, they will come.” And they did a * . spirits from the vasty deep immey, reaching down into dark closet, and hauling up remarked Mrs. R. nd come—in the shape of a Mr. I's back, broomstick in the hands of his irate which caused him to suddenly clap orOSs from spous his hand to his tingling spine, drop his ju | bad taste; but I will simply | face and figger have not lost all their pri | ing one eye open to sce th: spill his liquor, and remain for the rest ¢ the evening in the most doleful of spirits.” : . ow a bank’ whereon the wild thyme da poetical individual to” his friend Skoops, during the period of the last financial pani And I know a bank,” replied the other, “that’s going to feel the blows of some very wild times,” and he darted away down the reet, and made desperate haste to re “Te blows that Dank and scoop out his money before it might be too late. EB a Mrs. Squizzle. ON ATTENTIONS OF THE STERNER SECTS IN THE PAST, AND ON FLIRTING AT THE PRESENT DAY. Fiirtina is a business that requires a partnership, composed of the male and female sects; and, though it seems in most cases to prosper for a time the results laterly e been most disastrous to one or both arties in the concern. When Jabez Squizzle singled me the young women of Gobbletown as the ob- ject of his attentions, I was the bell of the town—I may say ‘* the admired HM admir- ers.” Twill not go on to say much better I might have done had I taken up with some other chap—for I consider that dmit that m out from Ow tine loveliness, and at this » when compared with the shriveled they tell the acute observer have been.” In my day, when a young man paid his stoa girl, he generally meant bu The saine was expected of the wlio received his distresses, In Gobblet —and I believe all country places in this respect—everybody knew ev business better than their ow | young man attempted to divide up I tions, bestowing a little little on another, | a coat of tar and fea kept ge nd, if the girl was lucky to have brother, a ride on a rail was added to the above pleasant entertainment. ‘This kept things runnin pretty lively be- tween the different sectzes, and the old folks could go to bed and go to sleep without keep- everything was th rlor with the on one thers—if her family going on straight in young folks, knowing they'd settle their own hash in an effective way among themsely But now-a-days its different. Since I've been a resident of this city, triflin with the | affections has met with some severe rebukes. ‘The pistol ball has settled one difficulty by getting the survivor in a worse dilemma, when a horsewhip or a good sound pummel- ling would have set thing quare. Tysaid to my nephew: ‘James Henry,” sez I, “you are now living in a place where the slightest difficulty is settled with powder comicbooks.com