Judge — February 17, 1883 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE BARTENDER i many a twist mixed drinks I make, The cocktail, punch and cobbler; With many a brandy smash I shake The thirst of Wall street equabbler. I pour, I shake, 1 draw, 1 And turn the faucot le While men en may go, But I sling the beer forever, Ever! Ever! ke chan; and I cause © swelled heads ” forever! dany a compound F inv With gin, he, and bitters sporting bent andl ly ZT ttip.” t For fops, + sour Ever! Eve I till ‘em up foreve How oft L pat the Of California vinta Ta potties § And praise its foamy Enlept swear tis purest F Aud They're asi joubt my wife, <0 Pekeek ‘em down foreverdys Evert Ever! Z I rule the roost” forevge tamped with Murtag’s great name, intacet neh; Jen : With many a Rock and Ryeridtt I -lash” the fly pin-poolengg: Las he homewan! reels aloiga Is © puted,” and strikes the 4 He's snubbed, he’s clubbed, His tlae with great endeavor, #4 And he may stop and mend his rve the * Iudge” foreter, Ever! Ever! I plan the “drunks ” forever! And when the boss is on a tear, Or takes his month's vacation, it as aly hy-poth-e-ca-tion,” Lemirk, E smite, 1 chin,” 1s The old man’s doabtings ever, For men may think, bat men can't prove, And Tbilk the boss f Evert Evert Yes, 1 knock Each day's receipts By my rthe wn" forever JEP, JOSLYN. A Lay Sermon. & Sprat could eat no fat Ws jean; twixt then both they clearet Api lieke could eat p plate Dratixa with a arned dissert which are pi jects are in the become a little bit too comn ye but truse engaging in ons on faced with the statement that the ad comprehe are soothit ion, have in their w mehow 1 the pulpit able to lighten the burc the saddened heart rejoice. plicity of hypothesis and deduction, that rectly to the mental and reflectedly to th and the proper selection of a text would do much to bring this about. The above text Is one that is en- gra(ted in the mind of every man in chikihood, where except in New Jersey—original sin has gained mach of a grip, and that unquestioning trust that lies on a captured bird after a salted tail, opens mind and heart to the receipt of good influen Let every man thns become as a little child, and draw from this little episode in the lives of two well-known chs acters the lessons it inculeates Cases of domestic peace and felicity, where “ hab- and “baby” hold forth, as well of domestic wr where broom and flat. What 1s wa only by as the ngling and trou! | thrown atu and spiritual, | iron rule the ranch, alw the former as an exem| et considered with certai simplicity of the Tl with a directness that is traly reff ar, the latter as a wart and as illustrativ little story may ‘ote th prot narrative, story is hing The eis no preamble, no “once ay i surrout na time” shenanigan, no tedi ings, their but the pith of the history is to the ancestry rarties, description of their dwellir relatives and neigh given without nonse1 tice first that the natn of the hero is Jack, not ponderous Jonathan, but o, the te ones, Joho or the mor a rollickin, who has friends, and intim intimate as to take liberties with one of his 1 rights, And, pray re 18 friends who them, name he bore. simply Jack, easy-going nan name ma too, pts ember right here, that non 3 not do Conslder, by the way, how hous Taink of J Jack Robinson, Captain Jack, and Ve oand sin omething to deserve was the ‘Shepard, Jack, and Horn » more, Jack Not would ¢: is no display her wa stinacy, but anata matter, This antageous det cavil ag the sam {, lat could eat no fat. There ranted willfalness or childish 1 inability to partake sht be supp et, but it wasn't ainst nature f alipose 1 to be a ver Ono on because she as his fellow-man; an optimistic view of th Wdefects be properly manazed, they ingen «lascui as the sequel will show matters. If our may prove Jack Sprat and so it was with *Ilis wife could eat no le Notice here that and the lesson to concerns thi Mending of husband wife, that perfect unity whereby the twain become one flesh, which is at the root. of all domestic happiness. She is ai wife. is enoazh honor to be “his wife, appears not to have desired any other Ut Uthat #he too had a certai might Now, what did th time have been y her name is not eve be dra and his It seems aliarity. that circumstances have proved addefect, nply natural poe © $0 must at one They met ring each i The result of last two lines two parties, whe hand maiden? nj and te resolved to wed. in they met again, jarities tty that happy 1m bo cleaned! the plate he platter clean,” stie thrift; bi Was 0 neellleas waste; ey cleared the erythi thi Bat there was more than thi peace ru dispate exclusive son is obvious: the future plate.” wg thrown to th } perfect dome ling about tid-bits; no ant tender parts; each had an The tes n which | pral status ¢ was ntilized " sl; there was no wr about tough province over their own division In making choice of a wife happiness and indeed the 1 be careful not to che whos nature tastes are too closely identical with y ‘own, for fear you will treal on each others’ toes in try ing to walk on the ea in parallel grooves. A; there is need of grvat caution. Ja ametr secured perfect p pathway, i runn ain, in choosing an opposite, Sprat chose one who was ¢ nil yet opposite to himself, Why? Simply beeanse he was suppl ened, ‘one whe This is the fa is necessary to make autiful ention of the plate ar that but one and that noth tal to his own. It isa counterpart th a harmonious whole, on could be drawn hy reasoning from the that the Sprats were cottage.” But this shed, for where they were living, icity, at is © that they preferred using but a single plate, whatever their eircumst F, manifest pach was nse poor love in te., ete. ach perfect nt improb Anil licked the platter clean.” This action on th open to some part of the Sprats may lay them legree of public criticism from sticklers te; they may be accused of zreediness and bl parison would be manifestly rly njast, willing ¢ evidence of for the story el the platter, leav However, this act bear " k the pl put in their * hey tter in best licks,” alflicked it, it might have shown too; bat since th and licked Had eed and shift- did the job th and shows a commendable what more a wife's ton nd a husband's on the same side wi ake yor nda, enter into his life and his fully, ac- ly what you undertake, and fight on » sum up: Husbands, supply the qualities you lack; wives, n and parcel of your bi select suc isl th make friends, live pe the same sid Tur shows exactly ow French call tomatoes “ Love Apples "—whic much they know of the enbject Love is more frequently foand in pairs than apples Oven in Brooklyn he look out for th but where else than for hind for his frends ulvice is ly be like echo please tik when a great po cide Teaves ann » bums.” The wonld any will ont look them bums War as 3 Bec nt bridesmaid like a bottle of MI wine e she is all boy and bouquet Pouce Cover Jestice.— unfortanate no consequence, ? Pri mistake of ter stice—Mow oll are woman Justico—F per—But yi Prisoner—¢ then busines ar honor Justice (t (erk)—Make it tifiy if you please, A bisraten pr 1 the daily newspapers informs ping public that an infant was thrown from a c window whil fall the train was running at and Atlanta on Mor teh reada, that the ¢ tween Macon thought, the disp As the trai the rate of half am that the ehi jn that portion 1 will recover, Tur Rajah of Jue the land peaker—And so pinted to office Second Speaker—Was it on aker—Really a3 well a3 1 Colonel i Speaker. my frie You ki that the Fir then, with whom has he fought? Se With his wif s been apy el T have heard g0, Fi al Si cowant Speaker nid Specker A sew whieh may and important discovery hy ply tic felicity oF infelicity, as the ca many artic ve a earings on dl may be s are made of celluloid That they ard y no means to be denied: t dan; as. combs for ladies wear, very ¢ al is at they ty ibly prove to U They are pied. we are told, « whieh a happy phor, highly in The reaches a certain point, thes amable, and « the te will e un cotton, which is explosive perature her ignite or € moment combs xplode with a loud noise and scatter the remains of the belle of th the length and breadth of the drawing-room. If ins ing such thi low bis wife vening through heaut 18 on we e loving hus. hand must either { cock extin, ed with a Bal nisher, put bis wife out when she gets into a blaz with the little that remains of he man, It is terribly suggestive that since these peculiarities of celluloid have become known certai Wearimewist philosophers are predict back. of the winter w prove so; but there is ice e our walks to break the ty pone trust it may left on many of pedestrian who to slip upon it comicbooks.com