Judge — November 11, 1882 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Hints on House-Cleaning How true the words of the poet: “Of all sad wonls of ton The oF pen, ¢—house-cleanin’ And yet the « hou perceive it in that” parti ffects to dislike tly informs hi keeper fail ular illumina ani ion. She to house-cl carne r neighbor over the back fe $ its approach, is, and how she would give twenty d if the awful job w “over with.” me, she wor tement ol with a ten forego. the operation for a new bonne ther on it. On such o¢ is the nt of the household, and. she enjoys her ions she eve of the depressing event, dur- ing h bors w kind nei and the Attic bsence from hot OU e to break into her house it from to she next day to tear up the ear: ‘ound with her dress pinned up, ud then impatiently murmur that oughly clean would comme! pets, slos! and now Lconceive how in the world a house | yets so dirty in six months. When woman gets the ballot, the next thing she will clamor for will be Con maki imperative duty six tim Man, excitement sional enactin he leanin is different) and confusion ning don’t thrill and cestatic thrill, enjoy life with quite as yuine enthusiasin if Ub oceur often however, constitutes attending his entire be Th hou with a hol He el ‘ot much would much avation did y than onee ind Vals less like a pirat of wild and exciti which he doesn't yearn with ntury— ‘There are sone speci fun 4 soul-consum: is one th: Al hints on the subjec < yearnfulness, and hou of th It we offer a few pract the adoption of which would rob th much of its terre like building al hermit. ni annual incubus of make man feel a cave and professi¢ ning should s be com v cloudy and dri ly in a becomin, when a youd humor, ry day, and wants a vent for the exuber Don't employ extra help, in order si the work in twenty-four hour: tend the whole busin over at least four days, just to plea husband. He will appreciate your economy, if he isn't a brute. Always time the work so that the dinin; room will be in a sloppy and nightin: condition at noon, and your husband will be obliged to climb over a table, a lounge, three which blockade the door leading tothe kitchen, where he will find ld bite” prepared on the head of a your ish flour barrel, and a woman with a whitewash brush in her hand. As soon down his lunch, gently invite him to pany you to the parlor, to lift one end o she gulps piano, while you pull out the carpe , iesee, and follow you with ay nd-good-will-to-znan smile on you hear him will and nd what | ance of his | | gritting his tec that. You will not f piece of soap at th may be ina great hurry | ofice, after spraining his b: and the s« | ste 1, but he feels too happy for | tL to unwitti dof the stairs, He wet back to the k at the piano, | p will enable him to | 3s without touching anythin: His inss y plac to go down ten but air unti he reaches the bottom. startle you at first, but that you left ap: | bottom of the | him w he rubs the will feel amply repaid for your thoughtful P haste may | when you remember lof water standin to break his fall, venly countenane at the ir nd sce such a © places » allectionately, you man when hem » the bottom in a single fyi leap, a in a pail of dirty water } the i he better imagined than pisode did ar he would fail to absorb the beauties of house i not oc Don't remove the globes the chande Itis a waste of time. be depended upon to knock them off with rom liers he serv some artic riture before house acon is half a day old, and new globes ys look well, Whe band comes | int yaud worn with the busi er him with a pleasant | and the information that the carpet in | | the be retires, to listen to his down before he ive room must be tacke It will be so instru dignitied and edifying rks when he fails to make the et by about six | reminded that squat and get up a inche intervals to wonder if the into the sun, and) whether s: and when he st $ up at br comet will plu there will be rpets to put down in the next world, vigorously declares that it was der that man wasn't built with a in his back, you will know the himself, hug ate-hinge he is enjoying and comel, if you let | If your maid is young husband will not grumbI him your pr assist he the ther room, ut perhaps it room, tos in his Gree n wrestle w carpet, whi He's just th would be be that he and so fortl Always leave a few carpet about the tlo © everythi ranged. When your husband jumps four o'clock a. if the even millions of miles long you fix things in tured, nin th goou-n ttor doesn't get the earpet rks seatte else bed tail is the pre r than on pointedly nid ing mornit hous this thought will over, pice with Mis in » may convey a exceeding rejoicene divertent lan- sage, howeve: ontrary im pression If the hints, and a few others that will st themselves to the intelligent and ex- wite—such as knocking a leg the cook-stove and. spilling the Noor; droppi perienced hous from under over th wash in your eye, a ical attendance; splashing the walls with dirty water, cle, —house-cleaning would delight the f line soul, a new subje and give newspaper humor: L for jokes. comicbooks.com