Judge — February 25, 1882 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE JUDGE. buildings? Millionaire.—Hang the new Hang | all newspapers except mi ails the building, anyway? But wait a minute, will you? Mille: Mr. Obsequious—he is my a tend to it. [have aot time to attend to it. | { I've got to send a cable dispatch to Europe = a new horse for twelve thousand dol- i F've got to bounce fifty girls out of Th | any employ for striking for higher was einsutti dollar and a hall and yet they wit ance of the poor Those gi a& week for sixty hours we strike. What next? Good+ I will see Mr. Obsequious, and he'll fix atfairs with you. Juspector Skairt (prayerfully).—1—I hope, | sir, you will forgive me? Millionaire (disdainfully).—Oh, ec I suppose you had to do it, nly: [Interval of several minutes, Enter Mn. On seQuios, , Obsequious.—You're Inspector § ector Skairt.—Y int? sir 1, wha quions.—N ails the Death Trap Buildin Inspector Skairt.—First thereare five cracks | in the front walls; each at least ten fect lon, reond, the rear wall bulges out in the middle pout six inches, Third, the foundations sunk for fully six inches. Fourth, the two side walls incline a ach other, | hav of forty-five ith, the rod is i ace fees to tumble in at any moment, Inspector I, 1 believe, but I—I—have to, You must | and the—the Department says you will have to attend to it OUR POPULAR FARCES. for intrading OUR CONDEMNED BUILDINGS. Mr, Obsequious.—Oh, we'll do it. Come mae | around in about a week. We'll have it all REPORTED BY “ED.” | fixed up. Exit both. " — | Inspector Skairt.—I'm I'm nspector of | SceNE SEconp.—Same, | | HARACTE . | Buildings. n't my fault. I've—T've got | (Enter Mr. Onskquios and Iysrector Mp, MILLIONAIRE (owner of the Death: | to do something, and fate forced me to be an KAIRT.] Trap Buildings). Mr. Ovseguious (his fac- | Inspector of Buildings. And I've 1 | afr, Obsequious.—I told you, old man, we'd totum.) INSPECTOR Department). Fore’ p it—to pronounce—to p: noui art (of the Building | n't hel fix it all O. K., and we’ r Conoxer’s Jury. | t pronounce— defy the law! No, sir! ‘Thos Millionaive.—What? putticd up and painted over Inspector Skairt.—The—the property of | julge in the ne yours—the Death-Trap Building's un i jon't AN acks we s for the r wall, we puta plank under MILLIONAIRE'S fice, | Mu n easy chair reading daily pa- | per which he owns, ate it. , are | Inspector Skairt.—How about the sinki built | of the foundations? | Millionsire.—Unsafe! Young | you crazy? Unsafe! Why, they w | in 1798, and furnished with all of the modern | Mfr, Obsequious.—The foundations sank six | iaprovements at that period. inches, I believe. Well, the eonly twenty+ Inspector Skairt.—I—I know it. Butsince | four inches of them an , and we'll let them that peri teen stories of brick have | sink eighteen more. ‘Then they will be all | been added on to the one original story of | sunk out of sight, and we won't need any wood, foundations. Millionaire.—Indeed! Well, whose prop- | Inspector Skair erty is it? It's mine, I beli nd Tguessa | Mr, Obsequious.—You bi n do what he pleases with his own pos- | clination of the side walls, we've put a small sessions, I'll put up seventeen more storics. | boy at cach wall to stop further inclinatio UI build it to the sky if I so desire. Inspector Skairt.—And the roof ? for it. Instead of being called a Pablie Bene. |. specter ¢ pe corteinlyyoucan: IF >| air ‘Cusequious “We've {eds t to factor, hanged itone infernal sheet hasn't act, | i L had my way I wouldn't bother you at all. | the chimne un’t tumble in, By the Millionaive (throwing paper aside).— editorial is very ‘ood—the one upon ¢ Freedom of the Pr Of course the pre should be fr did T buy a paper for if it ain't? That article upon “ Unjust Oppo- | sition to Our Railros is excellent, If it asn’t for our railroads what would the pub- lic have to do? Walk, of cou Suppose I arge ten ceats a mile, provide rickety run by incompetent and_ illy-pai ployees, and have a sm: about every ¢ isthat the public's busin I accommodate them, don’t 1?—but that is all the thanks I get 1 seve —Of course, ! vair' so it i 0" eis a agita cl for you. ually had the nerve to call me a Public Curse. | Buty you know, there is an agitation, heros a cheslefor you rl beastly public tion about unsafe buil Inspector Skairt.—For me? te, - ‘ 3, and we've got to do something to earn | Mr. Obsequious.—Ye | {Enter Ixsprctor SKAIRT, nervously.) our money. Your De: » Building is un- Inspector Skairt.— What for ? is Mr. Millionaire? | safe, a morning paper says so. Between you Mr. Obsequious.—Oh, just a little pecuni- nT do for you? | and 1, if it hadn't been for that meddle testimonial from Mr. Millionaire for your re you? | paper I would not nave known anything about | strict attention to duty (winking). See? | —I—I beg your pardon | it, for before I w: —Oh, yes, certainly, and Inspector Skairt. Millionaire.—Y1 and, by the w Inspector Skairt ome made inspector I used to | Inspector Skair! comicbooks.com