Judge — November 26, 1881 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

errata THE JUDGE. 13 Wm. Bowline, Esq.’s Sad Taking Off (4 ROMANTIC NAUTICAL BALLAD) Ho! landsmen all, and women, too, Of high or low condition, To sing to you a tale o'er true Is now my humble mission. Bill Bowline was a benpecked man, His ome was in commotion; At last his Sally drove him to A notion for the ocean, As days worw on and things grew worse, ‘This man Sal soda-rided, Picked up bis kit and out he lit, To seek a port decided. So Bill set sail; and eke bis Sal At losing bim grew frantic. Farewell!” cried Bill; “farewell, ole sal, Ill meet you hence, Atlantic.” ‘The first day out poor Bill was sick; Now what would he not barter To see his home again and That di metic, tartar, He thought of Sal, whose grievous ways Had made And winked and roared, Ob, Il gé back And be my Sally's whaler.” m 0 a sailor, Bat when the winds blew fair and fresh Across the briny wat Bill found a solace for himsel It was the captam’s da And day by day Bill made the maid Love's sweetest protestations; But still she stationary stood And prated of their station She said some rather cutting things, She gave her rancor cable, ‘Then threw herself into a throe On the ship's unstable table. Now Bill was wild; “0, take me, love, For better or for worser, And I will Gil my empty purso By a-marderia’ the purser.” Then Josephine wept on Bill's breast, And said, while passion stirred her, Til love you, Bill, and yet I mast Demur against de murder.” Long stood they thus in sweet delight, Each to the other sticking, Nor spoke a word, nor ever heard The larboanl wateh’s ticking. Bat bask! The lovers spring apart Some fect—say twenty-seven Bill sees the moon rise in the yeast— Me knows the hour is “leaven, 1 trea The cay the quarterleck; He's mad; ho's loudly talking. (Sea captains never tread the hull, The qnarter always walking.) Bill saw bls doom. The captain shouts * Aha! Oho! Aw-hawser! Such cursed deod as this, bad Bill, Dammy, I never saw, sir.” Bill Bowline then threw up his handa (He'd little else to throw up); Farewell!” he cried; then to the mate «Tm ready, sir, to 9 up.” Thoy placed him on the fatal plank Near stood tho captain's daughter; Bill took his final glass of grog, Then calmly took to water. The tale is tokl. The poor girl sighed, + Tis just as T expected.” Her papa said, **Take comfort, Ins, A shark your Bill's collected.” <M. rerny surmn, Parable of the Pilgrim. AyD it came to pass that a certain Pilgrim journeyed down from a distant province toward the great city of the east. And when he had tes thereof, he would fain come within the have reposed himself, but knew no place wherein to lay his head. And while he medi- tated upon these things there came unto him one arrayed in the guise of a runuer and made speech with him, saying “Behold ! thou art but newly arrived within the city and in sore necd of food and change of raiment; follow me, then, that I may relieve thy wants.” And when the Pilgrim heard him discourse after this fashion, he marveled much within himself, saying, “What manner of man is this, that maketh himself so fresh ? Verily, I will keep my starboard eye open.” And he took up his gripsack and followed him, And rived within the walls of the inn they were accosted by a youth of good auldress, who prevailed with them to imbibe acertain refreshing compound from out some curious and costly vessels which were called, in the figurative language of the cast, hooners. And they were upward of a cubit in height, and they were of glass. And while they reposed themselves after this man- ner they drinked ofthe beer of one Pfu, and they were exceeding dry. And it came to pass that alter they had refreshed themselves to the extent of their desire, the Pi tired to the solitude of his chamber to per- form his ablations, for he was a rightcous man, And while he was so alysent the two took counsel together and said, one unto the other, ‘Behold, it has pleased the Gods to deliver this man into our hands a captive to our bow, and to our beer, so to speak. Let us then combine instruction with amusement and go through him, and that while we en- rich ourselves with the shekels which he has amassed, 0 may we acquire dexterity in the arts which make us eligible to hold high office in the land.” And when they had so arranged the Pilgrim came in unto the and beeame seated. _ And they perceived that the fumes of the liquors which he had absorbed had ‘ed his understanding, and that he staggered, and that he reeled to and fro, like unto a druuken man. And when they saw these things they winked, one unto the other, and produced dice. And it came to pass that after they had played for upward ofsome time that the mind of the Pilgrim became possessed of a full understanding of the game, and that he offered to lay four score and ten sheke' on the result of one throw. And the two east about them to see how they might procure the wealth to cover his pile. And it so chanced that they joined issue on the result and bor- rowed ten shekels of the host, and after they had done these things, each man took one cast of thecup, And the first man reckoned up the two pair,and thought that it was good. And the second man threw three of a kind, and he also was content. And when the Pilgrim saw these things he braced up and threw four aces, and Jast naturally scooped in the whole pot. And when the two who had plotted for the over- throw of the P, P. saw that they were stuck, they waxed wrathy, and retired into an inner when they had a room that they might put up a job on him. And when they had closeted themselves to- gether, he who was surnamed ‘The Runner spake unto the youth of good ad¢ “Verily! we are up a tree, as it were; we went out to shear, and have come back shorn. This is not well. If my plan find favor in your sight, let us return to this hoary I’ tine and wrest from him his ill-gotten gains. And if he resist, we will convey him unto the back yard and smite him under the fith rib.” And the youth of good address saw that his words were the words of wisdom, and assent- ed thereto, And when they had come back to the place where they had left ye pious Pilgrin behold ! he had girded up his loins and fled. And when they had satisfied themselves t this was so, they swore divers strange and curious oaths, the like unto which no man had ever heard before, and threw dust upon their { rent their paper collars. And when their grief had in some manner subsided, the youth of good address spake unto the oth- “Behold ! we did covenant with the Publican to return to him his ten shekels, anc to divy up on the specie; and shall we sodo? Nay, verily, I say unto you, x have lost every blamed picayune we had, and his likewise. And if we fail in our covenant with him will he not give us into the custody of those uncircumcised de the officers ? and shall we not be brought before the Cadie and cast into a dungeon? Yea, verily, this is ex- ceedingly thin, Let us slope.” And when they had come out on to that street which is called Friend, they slid round different cor- ners and were seen no more. And when the hand-maiden brought these tidings unto the cars of the Publican, he raised up his voice and wept, saying, “Is it not enough that I lose my just share in the profits of the Pil- grim, but must I also make mine own sub- stance like uito one whom Allah hath aflliet- ed? Nay, this is too utterly, too hideously all bu And he wept sore, and refused all comfort, W. HM. heads ai er, saying, poR Mr. Dana! W is it that he docs not desire to hear Adelina Patti sing those charming melodies, “Coming Through 1 Rye,” and “Within a Mile of E Town?” Does the recollection of Old Rye’s fearful work in the editorial columns of our esteemed contemporary recall visions of the writers? If “Within a Mile of Edinboro’ Town” had been changed by the famous prima donna to “Within a Mile of Philadel- phia,” we might believe that the vision of a Brotherly Love of a Pennsylvania Sheriff in- quiring about his conviction in the Kemble libel suit had startled him. inbore’ Tue San Francisco Minstrels haven't been doing so well of late, and it is all because cer- tain papers have been circulating a report that the “end men” have a set of new jokes. Tt was a mean thing to do, for the majority of those who patronized them did so solely to re- juvenate themselves with their old boyhood jokes. Mo7uer Surrtoy almost as fast a stock is going down that of the gas companies, Ecomicbooks.com