Beadle's Half Dime Library, No. 657 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

William, the Mountain Mocking-bird and Won- der- Worker, in his Enchanting Songs and Acts of Prestidigitation and Necromancy ” was to ap- pear before them and make them forget the sor- rows that crush and the cares that vex, The ‘“* Wonder-Worker” was to be ably assisted, so the bills stated, by ‘‘ Master Harry, the Boy Acrobat, in his Feats of Vaulting and Tum- bling,” The excitements and attractions of Rocket ' Range were mainly confined to high betting in the gaming rooms and the street fights which too angen followed thereupon, Hence the advent of Warbling William bad been hailed with delight, and the long hall above the princi- pal saloon fitted up to accommodate the patrons of his exhibition. The twang of the guitar was followed: by the appearance of a dapper little man, dressed in the regulation swallow-tail cutaway and white cravat of the professional conjurer. He held his guitar daintily, and, on reaching the center of the contracted stage, made a smilingly ob- res Sr bow to the audience. t required but a glance, bowever, to show that, in spite of his cheery blandness, the world had not conferred wealth upon him in return for the heart-ease which it was his professed mission to disseminate. The once jaunty cut- away had faded to a lusterless brown, and ex- hibited here and there threadbare patches; the white cravat was soiled and dingy; and the shining polish of his shoes could not conceal the rents which disfigured them, The song, one of the pupular ballads of the day, was rendered in a clear, tenor voice of great compass and sweetness, It was encored, and he sung another, which was equally well received, This was followed by some very clumsy jug- glery, interspersed with awkward tumbling tricks by a boy.. There were a number of men in the room who could have done as well or bet- ter; and the crowd speedily began to manifest its impatience by grumbling remarks and de- risive hisses. The climax was reached when the **‘ Wonder-Worker” made such a botch of the fire-eating trick that he set his frilled shirt- front ablaze, Scarcely had the sounds of merriment ceased when a tall miner, with a week’s growth of red stubble half-concealing his features, pulled bis legs from under the bench in front of him and drew bis form erect, ‘“Gentlemen!” he said, bracing one hand against the wall and fhrusting the other deep into his trowser’s pocket, ‘‘ this hyer’s jist too much fer even the good-humored ana charitable people of Rocket Range. We’ve been induced by false promises to payin our good dollars, an’ w’ot hev we been give to show fer it? Noth- in’, gentlemen! Acchully nothin’. It’s a swin- dle, an’ I, fer one, want my money back !” Warbling William recoiled slightly while the miner was making this speech. The action, was not indicative of fear. It evinced rather a sort of mental shock, anf showed that his pride was hurt by what he considered a rude and unwar- ranted criticism, He rallied, however, even before the miner resumed his seat, The bland smile became blander and oilier than ever. He coolly pinned his vest across his scorched shirt-front, and im- pressively waved his hands for silence, “Tf there is anything I admire, citizens of Rocket Range, it is the kicker—the man who kicks upon all occasions and under all circum- stances. Without him life would be too much like sliding down a greased rainbow. There would be none of those little jars and jolts which serve to break the monotony and give it charac- ter.” He descended from the stage while speaking combed a silver half-dollar out of the grizzle and unkempt locks of a man on the front row, and tossed it to the loud-voiced miner, ‘*1f we haven’t brushed away your sorrows to 4 the extent of a half-dollar’s worth, say so; and [’ll comb the Philadelphia mint out of this gen- tleman’s frosty tresses and settle the deficit. ‘* But, as I was saying,” and he stepped back- ward to the stage, ‘‘I do admirea kicker. The kicker is the life of the world; and, whether he is kickipg his mother-in-law into the middle of the next week or simply exercising his powers on a performance like this, he is an interesting creature. It has been my good fortune to meet him frequently, and to celebrate his many vir- tues I once composed a little ditty.” He picked up the guitar and strummed it re- flectively. As for the miner who had caused this sudden change in the programme, be was reddening so that it was hard to tell where his stubby beard Warbling William. ended and his facial epidermis commenced; while the crowd roared and haw-hawed in a way that was simply maddening. Then, with a premonitory twang of the in- strument and an affected clearing of his throat, Warbling William began to sing, The words were evidently impromptu, and the tune was the then favorite one of ‘‘ The Little Old Log Cabin in the Lane:”’ ‘“‘In the lively town of Rocket Range the Warbler gave a show, And the Kicker paid his silver at the door; And he listened to the ringing of the guitar, and the singing; Watched the acting;—but he said ’twas all a bore. Then he got upon his nether limbs and kicked a mighty kick;— For, on feeling in his purse, he chanced to think That the remnant of his wealth was locked within his burglar-proof, And his empty pockets could not buy a drink, “Oh, the Kicker! Oh, the Kicker! Triumphant may he wave. Till time and life and hope shall all be o’er. Without him earth would stagnate from the cradle to the grave, And the cup of joy be lifted nevermore. *“T’ve met him in the cities, and I’ve seen him in the camps, And my smiling he has greeted with a frown; And he always makes things lively, and gives the world a jog— For his bread is ever falling, butter down, His pard, the bucking broncho, I’ve eft ridden on the trail, While the cowboys flocked to patch up my remains. But whate’er the shape you find him in, he’s kick- ing all the time, From the Rockies to New Mexic’s sandy plains, “Oh, the Kicker! Oh, the Kicker] Triumphant may he wave, Till time and life and hope shall all be o’er. Without him earth would stagnate from the cradle to the grave, And the cup of joy be lifted nevermore.”’ The song was greeted witha series of yells, whistles and cheers; and the hilarity became so general and infectious that even the kicker, whatever may have been his real feelings, was forced to join in the merriment, Through it all the Warbler maintained his air of unfailing and smiling serenity. No footlight favorite, conscious of his hold on the public, ever met a storm of applause with such unshaken as- surance and equanimity. Againand again, as the cheers rung out, be beld his guitar daintily before him and bowed himself almost to the floor. ‘*Tt pleases me, gentlemen,” and he laid his hand upon his heart as the uproar subsided, * to know that those choice bits of sentiment meet your approval, Similar philosophic thoughts have at various times filtered through the gray- ish matter of my cerebrum; and, with your kind permission, 1 will venture to put them into shape.” Again he strummed reflectively on the guitar, tapping his foot in time with the music, and then launched into a versified and ironical eulogy of the various foibles and eccentricities of life in the mining-camps. The hits were so palpable and taking that the good-will of the motley as- semblage was irresistibly gained. The performance ended, as it had commenced, with the rendition of a popular ballad. Then the crowd surged about him with good-humored congratulations, Smilingly making his way vite the throng, the Warbler blandly a proached the man whom he had held up to ridi- cule as the Kicker. A momentary scowl flitted across the latter’s face, but the eyes of his friends were upon bim and he chased it away with an uneasy smile, ‘*Permit me to present my pard,” said the Warbler, as the boy came forward. ‘‘ We wish to thank you for getting us out of an unpleasant predicament, The show was on the point of be- ing a flat failure when you furnished an oppor- tunity for the exhibition of my rhyming pro- pensities, Otherwise, I am much afraid the disgusted crowd would have hooted us out of the camp— which, you know, we couldn’t very well afford,” The showman’s presumptuous self-confidence and air of easy familiarity drove the slumbering anger from the miner’s heart. ‘** Wal, if you’re a mind to put it that way, I don’t know as I’ve any call to hold that song ag’in’ you. It was cute, an’ I Oyen I'll be called the Kicker to the eend o’ my days. My name’s Brown, Sam Brown,”—he extended his hand as he said it—‘‘an’ I don’t giner’ly ‘low any small rooster to crow over me, But, you're a good ’un, an’ too much of a banty, anyway, fer me to whup!” The statemevt tickled the bystanders so im- mensely that Brown seemed to feel he had at last got the better of the Warbler in the even- ing’s verbal dual. As the. crowd thinned out, the proprietor of the saloon approached the showman and his Boy Second. **1’m s’prised at Brown!” he chuckled, “I thought he’d jest nacher’ly chaw ye up when the show was over. You'd be a fu’st-class card fer my bizness. IfI ec’u’d git ye to sing that way in the saloon, it’d draw a houseful ever’ night. Is’pose, though, there ain’t no show fer that?” Warbling William cocked bis head sidewise, like a veritable mocking-bird, and for a moment -, appeared to be lost in thought, ‘* Well, now,” and he counted the words out as if weighing them, ‘*I don’t knoW but that would strike me favorably. You see, we haven’t been getting rich at this business, although Mas- ter Harry and I made a comfortable haul this evening.” He gave a comprehensive glance at his dingy coat and worn foot-gear. “*] think I kin make itto your interest,” said the proprietor, eagerly. ‘‘ How would thirty dollars a week and good chuck for two strike ef ** And sing nightly?” ** Yes; that’s all!” ‘**Done!” and the Warbler extended his hand to seal the contract, CHAPTER II, SOME DEVELOPMENTS, “It was well done; or, as the Mountain Mocking-bird would say, the affair was a superb success,” Warbling William laughed lightly, tipped back his chair in an easy attitude, and looked at the youth who had assisted him in the evening’s performance, The latter was a keen-eyed, bright-faced lad of about fourteen, Their room was in the ‘*‘ hotel” above the saloon. Toit they had repaired at a late hour, and were discussing the turn of events before retiring. ** There can’t be a possibility, I suppose, that we’ve started on a wrong scent? You fully re- cognized the man?” ‘*1’d know him if I should meet him in China!” the boy asserted, earnestly. ‘‘ We’re on the right track, Mr. Ware; I’m willing to take the responsibility of that.” ‘* 1 was just thinking what a joke it would be, ou happen to be wrong.” fr. Ware, as the boy had addressed him, un- sinned the concealed vest and serenely surveyed his scorched shirt-front,. ‘‘ We did botch things terribly. We're no great shakes as performers at any time, but our acting to-night was certainly bad enough to justify a lynching bee. I knew it would wake up the Kicker, should there chance to be one in the room.” A smile played over his expressive face, and he pulled thoughtfully at his tawny mustache, ‘“When you ig spotted our man, I began to scheme for an ex- cuse to remain here, I had already sized up Mr, Saloon-keeper, and knew that an exhibition of sublime cheek, together with a lot of apt and taking doggerel, would catch bim if he was to be caught. ‘*For a minute or two, though, I thought I would surely have to fight the Kicker, after the show was out. To avoid such a contingency re- ares a deal of pretty talking, I can tell you, he fellow came around easier than I thought he would; and altogether we’ve gained a host of admirers and friends, And we may need them, every one, before we get through.” He removed his cravat, as if thinking of re- tiring, ‘Youll want to mind your eye, Harry, m boy, to-morrow and to-morrow night, and all the time. You'll not be called on to assist the Mocking-bird in his nightly performances, and can, therefore, give your whole time to the work in hand. Don’t forget that you're to shadow our man night and day, and find out if possible all he does and says.” ‘‘Tll not forget it,” was the confident re- sponse, The next morning the Warbler introduced himself to the saloon-keeper as Mr. William if Ware, and throughout the day took especial. pains to make himself agreeable to that indi- vidual. The latter, whose name was Shelby Tanner, was much flattered by these attentions. He evidently considered the showman a man of Yl me word that you had ~ <5 7 ‘ oe > : ae “ wv hi dam i pA a > ait. f, fF Ne ' 7 ‘ 5 t + — ——— - _ —- x — = - C it m3 —— « ~~ ed sg * = o : : SS oe a eo Re 8 Oo re. — % - . . «7 4 . « >. a s . — be od ie ey ‘ ¥ «