You Bet Bob from Cross Crick — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

at I might ’a’ had him ter wed, adn’t been so hard on him. Et e sad ter think ov et.” en overca Ra ane shur was sad. y had al opped her eyes with her big whoopin nd sopped up a tear that hed down to ther end ov her mole. ye would wed again?” asked "in dag ugh ez could be. 1 would.” er. dne at yer first *sperience must have er all tHPPY: growin’ sorter interested like, j trimm™t onderstand et at all, young i strew’d ret wur le, et nded. ipshus?’ wasn’t no spring rooster, and I now why she called him young ut she did. Mebby out ov con- jer ther sex generally. by I don’t,” said Bob. at time ther crowd had stopped en, and ther four late pugvlists ” ae therin’ themselves up. sed et f k Cuddyloop wasn’t a match fer how,’ she said. “ When [ had ter [ « Wwertim thar wasn’t ther spirit ov a t back ¢ im. It was so easy thet et made my te 26)” said Bob. o he did. _ iW, et wasn’t so with Gunsight theta: She continnered. “He was some ter kil]. + ® fight, and I thought if 1 could ver, it would be interestin’ when we 00n beef have a fallin’ out. But, poor soul, way fro, 22ne to his reward before I could rt him.”’ ) jmayor was a man mighty to be eres tulated. , de hrough is too plum bad,” said Bob. i @€ might be called back to bless ne life, madam. But, aire these llers to be locked up?” ey had orter be.” t, then, who would be actin’ may- aLTee wi x3 lookin been t , lookin juartz i Di. ly not you?’ said. she, broke + Said Bob. I Cuday*? Same,” said she. G!”’ said Bob, plum dazed. ked. ught et was time fer me ter chip ar ain’t a man hyer better fitted busine®! Office,” said I, loud enough fer ‘ircle whan ‘‘Se what broots these hyer ade ov themselves, and draw yer vked gOMparisons.” or mayved skornful at ther Kitten and L goin’ ctin’ mayor. vonder (£2 Was all split up ther back like d fer fryin’, and Gila Gabe wur a to behold. wur tord asunder, so ter say, and hournin’ was nothin’ but a mere OV its former beauty. Truly, they in et with ther crowd no more. va Rd yelled fer ’em ter be cal- ‘nd itis what should be done with ’em,” | 1, sober as I could fer my wantin’ dam,” im, b 0 ther lock-up with ’em!” er actin’ mayor sorter shook himself ner and ketched on. ,°S, I order them to ther jail,” he wavin’ his arm with all ther pomp thority. — | , bless ye, he was so done up that nly looked funny, and ther crowd lafft ther more, bringin’ him ter ? a3 ’ said ch ot said Place «sé ; " t ht you aire in et too, Gila Gabe,” ly ali ther Amazon: “Ef anything, you jther wust ov ther bunch. Ef we tuned er one We lock up all, and you will 1 his fu, OY Sawbuck City,” ther actin’ “vr bellered, “ aire we ter be ruled by me ag fn’, 18 sech a thing as Sal Cuddy- “Bob, boi. ter rule this hyer—” | ; eS a . ry aah S ie ae: > 7 ee . nc eC SC 2. ee eS eee SS — - —-— ——e hated +, bit - ae Lo ts : ’ ee ¥ < - . ae 5 es Preyer ; : be . You Bet Bob from Cross Crick. ee ee Sal Cuddyloop swooped down on him, grabbed him by ther collar and ther | breast works ov his breeches, and made him walk Spanish, I’m tellin’ ye. “ Wetch along them thar other three,” she hollered. ‘‘ We’ll see whether or not a funeral ov a decent man is goin’ ter be made a shame and a mockery ov, I reckon. Fetch ’em along! ”’ And they wur fetched, forthwith. CHAPTER XIII. MY PARD GITS THAR. Et was a full swoop. I looked at Bob and he looked at me. Thar wuz ther four ov ’em, in ther hands ov ther Fillistines, so ter put et. ‘‘Bob,” said I, “et is gittin’ seeryus.” “Et plum shur is,” said he. We took holt ov each other, to stand stiddy while we talked. “You aire nomynated mayor,” said If. “But they’ll never ’lect me,” said Bob. “Why not?” said I.- “Tm from Cross Crick.’’ “What's ther diff?” “ They hate Cross Crick wuss’n pizen.” “Yet see how plum white they have used us all day, so fur,” said I. “That’s only ’cause ther fates hev fa- vored us,” he said. “ Et is goin’ ter turn, see ef et don’t.” ‘* Bt will be our fault ef et does.” ““Mebby enough,” said he. “Well,” said I, “ you aire nomynated, and et only remains ter git ther crowd willin’ ter vote ye into offis, and we'll conduct ther rest ov this hyer funeral to suit us,” “Kin we do it?” he asked me. ‘You leave that to m2,” said I. “ We’ll git on ther platform and be thar when they come back.” Most ov ther crowd had gone off to ther jail to see ther unforchunates locked up, leavin’ that part of ther field to us and some ov ther rest that felt too tired fer much exertion. We made two or three tries, and then got up on ther platform and.sot down on our soap boxes. We sot still and sollum. Ther fact ov ther business was, that platform had tooken ter pitchin’ and rollin’ wuss’n a tubby-boat in a chop sea. Thar wur indycashuns ov seasickness on our part. “ Bob,” said I, ‘“‘ how do you feel?” “Tm beginnin’ ter feel good now,” said he. “But,” said I, “kin you bear up till you have said that sarmount?” “JT plum forgot et!’”’ he exclaimed at me. “Then ye had better fix yer mind on et,” said I. “Can’t we omit et?” he asked. ““Nary omit.” Bob groaned. I knowed he was weakenin’. “Bob,” said I, “what did we come hyer fer?” “Ter have a by gosh time,” he an- swered prompt enough. “ Are we har¥in’ et?” I asked him. “We plum aire, so fur.” | “ And aire we goin’ ter have thes rest ov it? or aire you goin’ ter flunk and spile et?” “We'll have et,” said he. He said it in a way thet meant et, too. — Thar we sot, in our high hats and mournin’ array, when ther crowd kem back. | Sal Cuddyloop was at ther head, with a lot more wimmin flockin’ after her, and ther crowd ov men bringin’ up ther rear. fer actin’ sot. | T straightened up and greeted ’em. | again to t ’ Wo sé vi 1g 4 y +" P ’ 4 “\ % , eA: 2 y aw | bs & ‘ Aza | ‘ ef 4 po BP F4 Po i eae % Ea Res =) oe ye ute > « 4 ; . ¥ - ge ‘ ort = * a, r Fe, ee ate ort 7 . 7” . t 4 . ‘ ee 9 ey 4 . r > ot gle " Pen eRe Tes bie os a ae ae \, _ - ~*~ ° at, oti » wh , Vie Se FY ‘ Aire they cooped?” I asked ’em. “They sure enough aire,” answered Sal. I riz up in my place, givin’ myself plenty of spread ter stand stiddy, “Gents ov Sawbuck,” said I, “ your fair town is now without ary actin’ mayor. Wet has been proposed that my pard hyer, Bob Horner by name, be ‘elected ter that ’portant office.” I waved plenty, and salammed some. ' They cheered. “Thus far,” said I, “everything has passed off as nice as pie, with ther ex- ception ov ther recent onfortunate occur- rences, and fer that yer late actin’ mayor was ’sponsible.” They cheered plenty more. I salammed. “Now,” I said furder, “we have come over hyer as a dellygashun from Cross. Crick, as I have already told ye before, ter show our good will, to do honor to ver dead, and ter cement ther brother- hood ov ther two towns, ez et wur.” They all whooped her up. They wur in mood fer whoopin’ anything. “Tharfor,” I said furder, “ef ye see fit to "lect my pard to ther office ov actin’ mayor, we'll do our level best to carry on ther rest ov this hyer funeral to ther honor and credit ov all consarned. A man ov ther standin’ ov yer late mayor desarves ther best that kin be done or said ov him, and my pard is modestly ready ter do his best.” How they yelled! “ Henceforth,” said I furder, “all in favor ov makin’ You-bet Bob ther actin’ mayor ov this hyer camp fer ther time > 9? bein’ please ter signify accordin’. And blame me if. every man jack ov ‘am didn’t vote fer him, amd some ov . ther wimmin, too. They follered ther lead ov Sal Cuddy- loop. , Then I turned to my pard. “You-bet Bob,” said I, “you have been ’lected to ther greatest honor this hyer camp could show ye. You aire now ther actin’ mayor ov this hyer burg, vested with all ther ‘thority ov ther posishun, and ef you don’t do honor to et, et’s your fault.” I sot down amidst much cheerin’. ‘ Bob,” I whuspurd, “ we aire thar.” “We aire gittin’ thar,’’ said Bob. “You have got ter say somethin’,’” said I. ‘ What’ll I say?” he asked me. “ Make yer ’naugral speak,” said I. “ What’s that?” he asked. “Well, say somethin’,” I told him.. “Ye have got to. Remember, et ali ’pends on you now.” Bob looked queerious, and no wonder, havin’ so much honor heaped onto him all to oncet, but I seen him grit his jaws and I knowed he would stand up to ther rack, He got on his feet. Et took him a minit to git his grip, but he got et. Then he looked around him, as if-he was monark ov all he surveyed, and fer a fact he was, too. “Feller galoots,” he said, right cut bold, “hyer’s greetin’ ye. You have done me.a honor ov which I am preud, and I'll try to do honor to ther trust re- posed in me.” He paused ter hikkup. They cheered. “ Pust and foremost, by ther power in me vested as mayor ov this hyer town, I order and decree a treat fer ther hulk crowd ov ye, and may et be had with no delay. As fer me, jest fetch out @ ~— bottle ov ther best, and I will d 4 wes lass ~ Pe. eo , . ‘ es y > i) ~ et wy hk. - : se : J 4 4 _- “ fi : A hey - bs . - 7 , “— “4 _» comicbooks.com