Authentic Science Fiction Monthly, No. 56 — page 94: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PERSONAL CALL and going to report to Master- man that everything was fixed. The malice that had risen up in his mind was quenched. Damn that woman. Damn her for her purity and decency, and the strange feelings she had left in his mind. He was being suffocated by her. 4 nom ship roared in through the solar system. The cities fell away behind. A _ visit here, a rowdy night there... and the memories blotted out in time for the regular calls home. And as they approached Earth, the talk was all of home. Old loyalties flooded up, and the memories were all of houses and families. The eagerness of approaching the glittering, tawdry pleasures of Cassandra City were as nothing compared with these more lasting yearnings. This was the finest of all planet- falls. ~ Maxwell could not bear it. All this chatter of women and children sickened him. He had seen these men enjoying them- selves, and knew what they were like—how could they 93 kid themselves that they were real family men at heart, that there was no place like home? He watched them as they scattered from the ship. Land- ing formalities over, engines checked, the Customs in- spection finished, they were swinging off with their bags of presents, whistling, waving farewells until the next trip. He watched them. Let them go. He would find the usual hotel and go out for the usual drink. There would be some woman, somewhere. There would be forgetfulness. The teeming city seemed strangely empty. He did not belong here. He belonged in a heartless, impersonal ship, gladly lonely out among the blazing stars. No, that wasn’t true. He didn’t belong there, either. He just didn’t belong. He dredged up from the unknown depths of his mind an address. Then he cursed, and tried to cancel it out. It stayed. It would not be obliterated. Something for which he had not asked— something he had acquired without knowing, without wanting it. comicloooks.com