Argosy All-Story Weekly, July 1, 1922 — page 74: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

864 not be easy to explain just what it is that makes a junior eligible. It draws from all ranks, but mever slaps more than ten men In one year. On two years, it found none worthy to enter the severe bronze portal of its windowless, granite house, the replica of a famous tomb. The following year, the first two men it slapped were the grand- son of the President of these United States, and the son of Maggie, who for a quarter of a century had been charwoman of one of the college dormitortes. Last year it gave the accolade to three: ‘“‘ Maude ” Jillson, a2 youth with a Greek profite who had lived it down by .proving that his corpuscles were of the right cotor; ‘“‘ Scab ” Burke, whose father was president of oné of the three great labor unions af the country, and “ Pax” Rogers. They were fairly representative of the three social classes, were liked by the undergraduate body, and not unpopular with the faculty. Before a candidate for Sarcophagus is deemed worthy to receive the sacred and esoteric rite of mitiation withim the hal- lowed tomb itself, he must undergo an or- deal in public. It is this feature which brings joy to town and gown alike. So severe are these tests of courage, moral and physical, that it is not uncommon to have a boy whose very marrow yearns for the right te wear the litthke gotd and black enameled coffin which proclaims that he has won Kingston’s rarest gift, weaken and collapse at the accomplishment of this pre- liminary requirement. So it fell out last year. Burke was com- manded to write a passionate appeal for the open shop in industries, coupled with a violent attack upon union methods, and to publish this in a prominent newspaper under his own name, with the caption: ‘ Labor Leader’s Son Revolts.” After pacing the floor of his study all night long he balked at the barrier. Maude Jillson was required to array him- self in modish feminine attire—short skirt, rolled silk stockings, wig, sweet little toque, and with rouged cheeks and scented hand- kerchief to proceed at nigh noon to the most exclusive of the city’s schools for young ladies, and make an earnest effort to enroll as a student. ARGOSY-ALLSFORY WEEELY. Unlike Seab Burke, fillson made heroic efforts to accomplish his task. He walked— as in a nightmare—te the ivon gate of Miss Feller’s seminary, and tripped up tts flagged walk, When a scandalized gardener at- tempted to turn him back Maude knocked him flat with an wunladylike fist, but not without having his wig disarranged, and one sleeve of his waist torn off, revealing a freck- led, muscular arm. Proceeding up to the door he rang, and when the maid who an- swered his summons screamed and tried to close the door, he forced his way within. Further details are matter of rumor. It is certain that Miss Teller, severe as an abbess, swept down upon him from the regions above, and that there were at the time two classes of girls passing through the hall, om their way to or from lectures. Whatever may have happened, Jillson pres- ently emerged from Miss Teller’s seminary, sped through the yard, and at the gate ran mte an officer summoned by the gardener. Here he was arrested, and walked half a mile to the police station, followed by sev- eral hundred fellow students and citizens, He was bailed owt and reclothed, and the following morning paid a fine of twenty dollars for masquerading in woman’s gasb. Thus ended his effort to become a Sarcopha- gian. The third man, Rogers, was called Pax because of his pacifist principles. Pax was earning his way through cotlege. At first as agent for a laundry, and for the past two years as operator of a dining club, he had managed to pay his bills and con- tribute to all the extra-curriculum subscrip- tions. He was a simon-pure pacifist who, nevertheless, held the love and esteem of the turbulent undergraduate body. He was local president of the Intercollegi- ate Disarmament Society, and always occu- pied a seat on the platform at any meeting held in the interests of peace, tranquility and brotherly love. He had not been a draft evader, but had volunteered for the Red Cross before his country became in- volved, and had been decorated for bravery. He was a rangy, knobbly youth with big bones and whipcord sinews, obviously de- signed by nature for an ideal fullback; but DOOK C©