Argosy All-Story Weekly, July 1, 1922 — page 154: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

944 “How much will this vehicle of finance set us—me—back?” I asked, adding up little sums in my sober or working mind. “The schooner upon which I have taken an option will cost us—you—about twenty thousand pieces of silver,” said Jeff. “Your powers of imagination are plumb disturbing,” I told him. “ How did you happen to figger so close?” ‘It’s the owner’s price,” he answered. “T didn’t figger any.” “It’s my price, too,” I asserted. ‘“‘ Twenty thousand dollars in money is the fullest extent of my purse-proud snobbish- ness. After that is gone there am’t any- thing between me and sparring with the old time clock.” “This here cargo,” went on Jeff, “is obtained in large and commodious quanti- ties on a certain island I have in mind, and there is a crew of man and women working down there for us for nothing per diem.” : “You sure know how to make the ordi- nary methods of batting out a livelihood look powerful romantic,” I remarked. ‘‘ What ails them working people that they want to devote their energtes to making us happy? Are they paying a bet, or what?” “This here island is plumb overrun with Asiatic rats,” answered Jeff Parker, rod- ently. “Our cargo will consist of them rats. These here natives are working for us by killing the rats because they eat the crops and fruit and otherwise disturb the even tenor-’leven of their ways.” “T ain’t no pie-eyed piper,” I told Jeff. “Who are you going to trap them rats with and why?” -“Three or four cities on the Pacific or Western coast of America have standing offers of five cents a head bounty on Asiatic rats,” answered Jeff Parker. “‘ Our business is going to be to supply them with said rats.” Gosh! It was the reasonablest line of reasoning I ever heard. Here was the market and there was the rats. It was onfy a matter of bringing the two together. “We will deliver a cargo of, say, two million rats per trip,” warbled Jeff. And it was certainly sweet music the way he told it. ‘These here cities are waging a cam- ARGOSY-ALLSTORY WEEKLY. paign against the rat,’» he went on, “ and they are making it an object for folks to bring ’em in. There ain’t nobody barred. You bring in the rat and they pay you the nickel—no identification, no red tape or anything.” “Me, I don’t know much about port regulations, or docking privileges, or any other maritime rule,” I said, “but ain’t there something in the by-laws and con- stitution that says somebody has to inspect @ cargo at & given point, or at quarantine, or somewheres?”’ “ Sure,” answered. Jeif. “ But what of it? We will put all these here rats m barrels— ander a layer of coconuts. The inspectors bust open the barrels, find the coconuts and give us the O. K. Anyway, there are nine different ways of beating ‘em. We can bring the rats into port in a gasoline launch if we want to. Let’s worry about landing when we get ready to land.” Well, after all, it sounded reasonable to me. It certainly was a simple rattish prop- osition, and if you stop to figger that five cents times two million rats is one hundred thousand dollars cash money, why, I’d like to see the guy that could resist the persuas- ive ways of Jeff Parker when he put it in plain moneyed words. “How many trips there and back were you about to allege we could make per year?” I asked, thinking on all four cylin- ders and adjusting the rapid-calculating side of the old bean so it would register into high figgers. “ Four, at least,” he replied. five.” “In round or symmetrical numbers,” I observed “ five of them trips would bring us in a total of five hundred thousand or half a million dollars per annum.” “Exactly,” said Jeff. “Half of which finances of the realm would be yours to “ Mebbe have and to hold, or otherwise dispose of im such places made and provided.” “ Yeh,” I said, “ but I’m expending all the expensive cash, then what?” ‘“‘ And I’m furnishing the rats free,” re- turned Jeff. ‘‘ And I’m the gent that’s em- ploying the brains. Also I got the idea.” But when he said we wouldn’t take out any profits of money from the venture till comicloool C©