The Argosy — page 334: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Letters from Majorca. 315 The first portion of the journey was very slowly performed. We had that tremendous ascent to climb which raises us above the world, and enables us to look down upon Soller, as upon a little town lying in the hollow of the mountains. The diligence took it very leisurely. JI think we were quite two hours reaching the summit. We walked the greater part of the way, taking short cuts up the hillsides through orange and lemon groves, and soon finding ourselves far ahead of the old perambulating bathing machine. I do not know a better name for it. Then there was the descent on the other side, which was taken almost as slowly. Here we were in the midst of grand mountains, luxuriant and laughing, bearing in abundance all the fruit of the earth, It is a wonderfully rich valley. In the distance we looked upon Palma, opening up between the chains of hills, reposing in its great plain, with the shimmering sapphire sea beyond. ‘There was our goal, but when should we reach it? ) At the half-way house we stayed an age. The women alighted for a time, and the vehicle groaned and creaked its relief. Then they drank something out of a bottle, and ate something that afterwards we found must have been strongly flavoured with garlic. We anathematised the landlord of the Fonda de Mallorca, who had subjected us to this nuisance, and almost hoped to find the lordly barouche had been swallowed up by an earthquake. When we started off again at a snail’s gallop from the half-way house, deceitful Delilah had transferred her wiles and her substantial charms to the driver, and mounted beside him on the box: where, no longer having H. C.’s feet to practise upon, she turned the force of her umbrella upon the unhappy horses and prodded them into something like a paralysed vitality. In spite of that, it was dark long before we reached Palma. But at length the railway station loomed up, and then we were stopped outside the gates by the customs, who searched diligently to see that we had nothing to eat and drink smuggled about us. Save the mark ! We were damp with a heavy dew; exhausted from hours of torture in this antiquated infernal machine ; famished enough to have eaten up a boiled beggar-woman, and in a state of nerves bordering on phrenzy. No, there was nothing to eat anywhere ; not even chopped hay for the horses ; so we were allowed to proceed. A singular proceeding it was. Werumbled through the gateway, and a minute after, the machine stopped; we were politely ordered to get out; our traps, precious camera and all, were coolly deposited in the middle of the road, and there we were left ; homeless, ragged and tanned. I never felt more cast adrift. We had not the slightest idea as to where we were, or how we should find our way to the fonda. We spoke none of their language. We were quite unable to carry our own goods and chattels. We ordered the diligence to take us on to our () COM LOO Ss (GO)