The Argosy — page 327: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

@4 306 A Dream from Heaven. “Oh dear! And Jemima’s cross, and won’t answer when we ask her. Mamma, do you know what Isabel says ?—she says she wishes we had our piano again, and the nice music-stool that turned round, and she says I was too little to remember them. Why have we not got © them now ?” ‘‘ Because—they were left in the old house, Cary.” ‘““What a shame! When shall we go back to that house, mamma?” ‘“‘Some time,” returned Margaret, ‘for to one as good.” And Cary danced away again. ‘“‘'You spoke earnestly to the child, Margaret,” I said. ‘‘ Spoke as if you had faith.” ‘“‘T have faith; trusting, earnest faith that this terrible time will come to anend. I wish I could see you, Adam, with more of it.” “ T had faith also, until I was wearied out.” ‘“‘T know we have waited long ; and there are times when I give way to despondency : but the mood soon changes again. A bright evening after a rainy day, a bit of blue sky peeping out of the leaden clouds, a green leaf budding on a wintry tree, the first promising glimmer of the new moon—all these speak hope to my inward spirit.” Time was when I thought as my wife does. I was even more sanguine than she. When despair was ready to overtake me, I have said, Courage and patience! courage and patience ! and so buoyed myself up. But day succeeded day, week followed week, month replaced month, and year gives turn to year; and there is no change. friday.—\ can no longer rest at night, for the harrassing annoyances and disappointments that make up the day are repeated with vivid in- tensity in my dreams. ‘Towards morning especially, my mind is busy with the previous day’s persecutions, the doubting dread of the one forthcoming. All is enacted and re-enacted with terrible distinctness, and I awake weary and unrefreshed from imaginary evils, to get up and live over again the reality. Wednesday.—Gibbons’s house wants a clerk. Iam going to apply for it. Salary #100 a year. Margaret looked grave when I mentioned the amount, and heaved a deep sigh. ‘‘ But it is better than nothing, Adam,” she said. Better than nothing! | Yes, it will keep body and soul together until we can turn ourselves round. ‘ To-morrow morn- ing,” I said aloud, “I will go there.” ‘Mind you go in time,” an- swered my wife. : Thursday Night.—I did go. I was unsuccessful. It is ever so. The second partner, Snail, a man who was once proud to shake my hand, coldly said they should prefer engaging one who had been brought up to warehouse business, absolutely hinting that he thought me too much of a gentleman. I passed by the Thames on my way home-to-night, and thought how calmly one might lie there underneath the waters, i one could but lie there undisturbed for ever. Gomichbooks:co