The Argosy, Volume XLIV — page 252: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A BARGAIN IN WEEDS. BY C. LANGTON CLARKE. A tale of tobacco, involving a wife’s economy and a _ husband’s_ wariness. OR more than three-quarters of an hour the harassed clerk had en- deavored in vain to satisfy the exacting taste of Mrs. Scales in the matter of a birthday present for her husband. Mrs. Scales was voung and pretty, and the clerk at first derived a certain amount of enjovment from his task, but it began to pall after a while, and by the time three tiny furrows had made their appearance on the white brow of his customer, and she had replied to one or two well meant suggestions in a manner which might have been termed “snappy,” he began to fecl des- perate. “ How would this do?” he asked, ta- king a small article from the show-case and offering it for inspection. “This” was a toothpick case, and Mrs. Scales regarded 1t with scorn. “My husband would as soon think of carrying a bowie-knife,” she an- swered, transferring the look from the toothpick case to the clerk. The young man, who carried one himself and was under the impression that no gentleman’s equipment was complete without it, felt aggrieved. “The knife department is at the far end of the store,” he said, wilfully mis- understanding her. “1 don’t want a knife,” Mrs. Scales answered. “I told vou that before. Presents of knives are unlucky. Surely to goodness you can think of some- thing.” The clerk reminded her that he had thought of a good many things, and added that he was getting a little con- fused. “So tiresome and exhausting! ” said Mrs. Seales. - “Very,” answered the clerk express- ively. There was a long silence, both puck- ering their brows’ as an aid to con- centration of thought. “What about a box of cigars?” the C; OUgle clerk said at last, desperately. “I should think your husband would enjoy a smoke ever so much more if you bought them for him.” To his surprise and relief his cus- tomer smiled brightly, and appeared to approve highly of the suggestion. “That is a capital idea,” she ex- claimed. “ Why didn’t you think of it before? But perhaps I shouldn’t choose the right kind,” she added anxiously. “Oh, yes, you would,” insisted the clerk, who was a member of a Y. M. C. A. and an anti-nicotine league,and knew as much about tobacco as Mrs. Scales herself. “ There’s very little difference in cigars except the price. You tell them how much you want to pay, and they will give you just what you want.” Determined not to give her any time _ for reflection, he leaned over his coun- ter and directed the hesitating woman to the tobacco department in a distant corner of the store. Then, as the slender figure became lost in the crowd, he turned to his counter-mate with an exaggcrated air of relief. “| wouldn’t be that woman’s hus- band, not with twenty thousand dollars a year,” he said impressively. “No,” replied the other, who had been casting covert glances of admira- tion at Mrs. Scales’ pretty facé and figure, “ I don’t suppose you ever would, Tommy. She’s just a few notches above your style, my boy.” The deeply offended Tommy made no reply, but bent his attention to repla- cing the numerous knickknacks which strewed his counter. Meanwhile Mrs. Scales, having made her way to the tobacco department, tinidly approached the presiding gen- lus, a young man with a large mustache and a loud waistcoat, and tentatively inquired the price of cigars. “We have them all prices, madam,” replied the voung man with a reassur- ing smile. “ Any partie’lar brand ? ” GOHMGOOo (COL