The Argosy, March 1907 — page 125: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE “GREEN PARROT. ‘“Say to Martha?” cried Mr. Scales, staring at his wife open-mouthed. “Yes,” persisted Mrs. Scales, with deadly calm. “As I was coming up- stairs I distinctly heard her say, ‘ Get away! I hate you!’ and then she rushed out of this room and down-stairs. [| didn’t think you were that sort of man, George.” Mr. Scales, still clutching his stick, raised his hands aloft in mute appeal to Heaven. “Good Lord!” he said. ‘“ The utter perversity and foolishness of women. It was this cursed bird you heard. It near- ly scared us into fits.” Mrs. Scales pursed her lips, and raised her eyebrows till her forehead wrinkled. ‘““A most likely story, indeed,” she said. “Scared you? That poor little innocent bird? Come, George, don’t take me for a fool. What was Martha doing in this room at all?” _ Almost speechless, and decidedly in- coherent with indignation, Mr. Scales related the incidents of the previous quarter of an hour, and became more deeply incensed as his wife maintained her expression of cold incredulity. ‘““And what you mean by going and spending money on a beast like that to make all this trouble I can’t think,” he wound up. “ Perfectly preposterous.”’ “Tt wouldn’t try and bluster, George,” replied the wife coolly. Mr. Scales’s indignant rejoinder was cut short by a ring at the door-bell, and a moment later Martha was heard to open the door. “Mrs. Scales in?” asked a_ high- pitched voice. “ Yes? How charm- ing! And Mr. Scales, too? Isn’t that lovely, Maud! Mr. Scales at home so early. alone? ”’ “Yes, ma’am,” replied Martha. “Let them know we are here, please,”’ said another voice, of the same tin-pan timbre as the first. “ Why, what’s the matter with you, child? You're as pale as death, and all of a tremble.” ‘“There’s nothing the matter with me, ma’am,’’. replied Martha. “I had a bit of a scare just now, that’s all.” . Mrs. Scales, with her hand on the knob of the open study door, looked re- proachfully at her husband. To think of catching Are they 697 ‘You hear, George,” she said, in a low voice. | ‘“ Drunk!” shrilled the parrot sudden- ly—so suddenly that both husband and wife started violently. ‘ Drunk again! Get away-y-y! I hate you!” Mr. and Mrs. Scales exchanged glances. In the eyes of the husband was an expression of triumph, in those of the wife a look of penitence. Mrs. Scales closed the door softly. _““Pm sorry, George,’ she whispered. Mr. Scales was diplomat enough to know when to be magnanimous. “All right,’ he said, holding out his hand. “,We’ll say no more about it. I suppose appearances were against me, but you might have known me better. But as for that bird——” and he shook his fist at the cage. ‘Oh, George,” Mrs. Scales cried hap- pily, “ you wouldn’t hurt him—not when he’s just put things all right again. Think how he spoke out just-at the proper time. See how cute he looks. I believe he knew just what he was do- ing.” Mr. wife. “We'll get him a new cage as a re-: ward,” he said. “i wonder why Mar- tha doesn’t come up and let us know those two old cats are here. I suppose her nerves haven’t recovered yet. We'd better go down,” he added, with a re- signed shrug. Together they descended the stairs, to find Martha standing in the hall with a scared and perplexed expresston of countenance. ‘Mrs. Worthington and Miss Scad- ders are in the drawing-room, I sup- pose?” Mrs. Scales remarked. “No, ma’am,” replied Martha, star- ing hard at Mr. Scales. “No!” ejaculated Mrs. Scales sharp- ly.. “ Where are they?” 3 ‘ ‘They’ve went, ma’am,”’ said Martha. “ They’ve went?’ echoed Mrs. Scales, regardless of syntax. ‘‘ Why, I distinct- ly heard them ask if we were at home, and you said ‘ Yes.’ ”’ “ Yes, ma’am, they did,” replied the girl, “ but—but——” s‘ But what? ’’ demanded Mrs. Scales sharply. ‘ Don’t stare like that.” ‘* Well, ma’am,” said Martha, rallying Scales laughed and kissed his Gomichbooks:co