Argosy All-Story Weekly, March 15, 1924 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

652 of the world down here, and what he don’t own he’s got mortgaged. ‘““ He owns this house, and we’re payin’ him more money for this summer’s rent _ than the whole burg has seen since ‘the rec- ord lobster catch in the eighties. He’s one of them hard boiled, tight wadded skinflints who support chain drug stores by buying up porous plasters to stick the dollar bills in their pockets with.” — “And do I understand he’ S ea ¢¢ No. 3. “Oh, he’s the dead -one.”’ a“ Hell, no. He wouldn’t die till after the end of August, not 1f you tied him to the middle of Fifth Avenue at Forty- Second Street and started the traffic.” ‘But he'll be tired of life ‘after-the end of August?- What’s the matter—can’f he stand the Long Island winters?” - ‘No, you don’t get me. ‘That. brings us down to the dead ones. The end. of August 15 when his favorite mortgage comes due. That’s his mortgage on: the Fiske place, and he’s been so many years-betting | blue chips in. the way of heavier mortgages on the Fiske place that it’s got to be a sort of local handicap how long Judson—that’s Fiske—will last. . ‘Odds are seven hundred to a tenth of one per cent that little Lionel—that’s Humphrey—takes over the old homestead September first. He wouldn’t no more die before that than a kid would -get sick be- fore Christmas, and if the foreclosure don’t come off, he'll bump off with a busted. heart.” “* And who is the dead one you refer to?” ‘The one I had in mind was Fiske, but almost any little playmate of Lionel’s is dead as far as our pickin’s are concerned. Fiske, he’s groggy as a cold Storage fish, and just waitin’ for the grand K. O. Then there’s Henry Sumpty. “Ain't that the ulti-— mate thing in names? Henry Sumpty!” ‘““T seem to have heard it before some- where.” “ Sure you have. We rented this house off him. Henry is Lionel’s cousin by Lionel’s third wife, which is the present one. The ‘old boy owns Henry along with the rest of the vacant lots around here, and throws him little things like the renting of ARGOSY-ALLSTORY time, past. a dollar. WEEKLY. this-dump, whenever Henry is deserving. I guess Henry ain’t deserving most of the ‘cause when his last kid was born the old man didn’t come through with enough to pay the grocer, let alone the doctor’s bill, so Henry had-'to ‘sell his lob- ster pots and open a soft drink parlor and pool room. That’s down on the point. That's where J can run a real nice little game.’ “ That’s where you’re mistaken,” said ~ Corvan pointedly. “If these people get wise to the kind of slicker ‘you are, Mad- dox, we'll be lucky to get up to thé station ahead of the injured populace.” “ But ain't I tellin’ yer? They’re dead. Dead from the ground up. You .could paint Henry Sumpty’s head yellow and sell it for a gold ‘brick. And as for this Humphrey sport! He’s the hard shell kid. The skin- flint hick. “He’s so wise he’d buy cigar coupons for ninety cents apiece because ‘they’re green, like dollar bills. Why, even the local dames have played him for a sucker thrée times running in the matrimonial ‘handicap; think what a few minutes’ thought and three walnut shells could do!” Corvan grinned an involuntary | tribute to Snake’s eloquence. “You might try and sell him this ¢ estate,” he suggested. Maddox brightened. “Sure!” he exclaimed hopefully. ‘ Any little thing like that.” Then, his face fall- ing ashe saw Corvan’s mockery: “ Aw, you know the kind he is, chief; he ‘can’t look Why, he even ‘played his own son dirt because he went and married the daughter of a poor sucker who lapped ‘up enough booze to prove that he hadn’t carried any life insurance.’ ' “THs no use, Maddox,” decided Corvan. “We can’t fool with the small fry. -They _ are honest country people, and we'd better leave them alone. God knows, they earn every penny they’ve got.” He arose and, walking to the arcloxay, threw the curtains back again. “ And they haven’t got enough to make it worth while,” he finished whimsically. ‘“ But this Humphrey stiff is still rolling in it!” protested Maddox. ‘ You could CoOMmlclooo S C@