Argosy All-Story Weekly, February 23, 1924 — page 97: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

~*~ EIGHT MONKEYS telligence, you can coach him for Nell Teller’s impending interview. If he gets away with it, you’re all right. If he doesn’t you’re no worse off than you are now.” “Yes,” Harlowe objected, “‘ but if she’s as clever as you say and has seen those three inscriptions in books given to you by Chub, Blythe, and Malcolm, the first thing she will do will be to ask for his autograph. Then where is he?” “ That only goes to prove that a broken arm is a blessing in disguise,” I said. There was quite a murmur of approbation, and the boys nodded and smiled at me as if brains hitherto unsuspected had suddenly been revealed to them. “ This is what I suggest,” I proceeded; “T know just about the questions an inter- viewer will ask. I’ll write out an interview containing all these questions and with answers which brother Jervis can com- mit to memory. He has a memory, I sup- pose.” “Oh, don’t misunderstand me,” McKes- son interposed; “Tom is nobody’s fool. He’s a pretty fair talker when he gets started. Among other jobs he has tried, he has solicited life insurance and sold auto- mobiles, or tried to sell them, and though he was a failure at both, he must have learned something about talking.” ‘Nell Teller likes to air the fact that she can speak French. Can Jervis speak French?” I asked. “Can he?” said McKesson. “‘ His mother was French, and when he had money, it was a liberal education to hear him order a dinner.”’ Several of the fellows instantly declared themselves in favor of my plan; others sug- gested objections and possible snags that might be struck; but the more these con- sidered the scheme the better they liked it and the finish was that I was acclaimed as a peerless leader. It was arranged that I should draw up an imaginary interview containing all the ques- tions that Nell Teller, or any other inter- viewer would be likely to ask, together with carefully prepared answers; also, at Har- lowe’s suggestion, I was to write out a list of “ Don’ts”” as a warning to Tom Jervis, telling him what subjects to avoid. The AND A CATSPAW. — 255 scheme grew in popular favor as we dis- cussed it, and at the end of the consulta- tion it looked like a pretty fair gleam of hope. : We had just settled everything nicely when Tom Jervis reappeared bringing with him a cheerful smile and a slight whiff of iodoform. He offered to go away again if we hadn’t finished all we had to say about him; but he received the unanimous assur- ance that the discussion had been entirely in his interest. He was asked to sit down, provided with a drink, and then the propo- sition was put up to him, including a full account of the Seumas Shayne scheme from its inception. When he knew what the boys were up against and learned that he was proposed as the man of the hour, he laughed loud and long. He had the sort of laugh that calls upon all hearers to join in, and then and there some of the Seumases saw for the first time the comic side of the great con- spiracy. It was quite a relief to me to find that the lad had a sense of humor, as it indicated that he would enter into the pro- ject, if only as a joke, and would carry it through in the proper spirit. “Of course I’ll do it,” he said, “if it will help you out of a scrape. You have all been mighty nice to me. The only danger { can see is that some one from out West might happen along and recognize me.” “We'll look out for that,” Harlowe as- sured him. ‘“ Fortunately you know hardly anyone in New York, and since‘you’ve been in town all you have seen of it has been in your walks to and from the doctor’s office.” “And from now on you'll have to keep under cover until you make your début as Seumas,” added McKesson. ‘“ Just leave all that to us.” “ But do you think I could get away with it?” Jervis asked doubtfully. ‘ As you tell it to me, I am supposed to be a musician, a painter, a novelist, a poet, and the Lord knows what beside. I might make some awful break and give the whole thing away. For instance, do you think I could talk like a poet?” “ We don’t want you to,’”’ answered Cha- worth, grinning at Chub Burton. “ All we want of you is to be a regular human COPMIC OO KS