The Argosy, Vol. 81, No. 4 — page 189: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

COCHRANE’S AUSTRALIAN STUNT. waved the insulting suggestion away, and the placating smile ridiculed the very idea. “Very good, then. I'll give you a check for the watch. I obiect to doing business on credit, and I may leave the city to-mor- row and be away for some time.” “As you wish, sir, of course. step over to this table to write? sir? Here is my fountain.” Three minutes later the mutually obliged pair parted, the one with a well bred but haughty nod to the menial who had just done him service, the other with much pivotal inclination and handrubbing. Mr. James Cochrane did not go more than a few steps before his careless hand, idly stroking his chin, made the horrified discovery that a tiny growth of hair had arisen since the morning to disfigure the virgin immaculateness of his face. Provi- Will you A pen, dentially he was exactly opposite the door _ of a barber shop, which he entered. His shave was performed with the ceremony of a religious rite and was prolonged to pass almost insensibly into the soothing balm of © a shampoo, the operation enlivened by the low toned chat that barbers the world over have invented to cheer the hapless occu- pants of their inquisitorial chairs. The barber’s questions had elicited the interesting information that the gentleman now under his soapy hands was a stranger to the city and was leaving almost imme- diately. Growing more confidential, the gentleman admitted that his departure was so timed that he would be away before the bank opened and foolishly extravagant pur- chases had depleted his assets. Would his friend the barber come to his rescue, in a way that would leave a hand- some profit for himself? He had a fifty guinea gold watch that he would sell for twenty-five pounds if he could get ready money. Without casting a slur’on a profession in its origin closely allied to the medical and, presumably not without its strict etiquette, it may be remarked that there are many members of this honorable guild in Aus- tralia, who add to their income by rendering to citizens certain services forbidden by law indeed, but appealing to every real lover of sport in a very sporting community, services not unremotely connected with the race- track. Under these circumstances Mr. Cochrane’s request was not necessarily ab- rupt, but there is a ritual in these matters. The barber tried not to laugh at the sug- 755 gestion that he could afford to own a two hundred and fifty dollar watch. “T’m a nice 8ne to buy watches, I am,” he grinned. “I couldn’t afford twen’y-five pouns for jewel’ry, bless yer innocence. My colonial! My ole watch corst me twen’y- five bob, an’ that does me.” ~_- The shampoo had drawn to a reluctant close, and the shampooed drew the watch, shining in its new beauty, from his pocket. ‘Here she is. Do you mean you couldn’t dig up twenty-five for this, when I can show you how you can get near fifty for it? Why, I’ve just bought it for fifty, but I’ve got to get away.” The friendly barber grinned again. “T just bet you’ve gotta git away, if you're willin’ to sell fifty quid’s worth for ‘arf the money. No, thanks.” The implication was plain. ‘Nothing like that at all. Here, here’s a proof. I’ve just bought this from Sweet’ = next door but one, but I haven’t the gall to take it back and look like a fool. I’m going to have a face massage now, and one of these boys can fix me, while you take this around to Sweet’s. They won’t identify the watch, but they’ll name its value, and I'll stay here, so if there’s anything wrong I'll be on deck to explain: Take it to the salesman at the counter opposite the door. Don’t tell him anything. Just ask its value. Then you'll be satisfied.”’ The doubtful barber hesitated, looked at the dangling watch, and was lost. “Well’s no harm in askin’, I suppose. You’re not the first nutty one I’ve seen by a long shot, an’ if you want to act the giddy Carnegie, I won’t stop yer. The watch ain’t mine, an’ you’re not likely to git away without it or the cash.”’ Doubtful fingers were slowly unfasten- ing his white apron. A spasm of caution led him to whisper to his assistant behind the counter of the front shop. “Keep an eye on ther dude with ther top hat. Don’t let him git away till I git back.” Then he entered his big neighbor’s, quick- ly located the watch salesman and broached his business. ‘““What’s this ’ere ticker worth, boss?” he asked, handing it out. “That? Let’s see. How did you come by this?” Obsequiousness was not for this fellow laborer. “Never mind that. it’s worth.” “It’s one of our fifty guinea watches,” I wanta know what S CONNICIOC G (E@)