The Argosy, October 1906 — page 146: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ad, but + Bos yell all the tine, like the ry devil.” : You seem to ee a good deal more if them than I do, ” Mr. Scales said, : “and what you do Sale very encouraging. I’ll bet it’s They always are when you want them to be something else. However, I - suppose I can keep out of its way.’ z — — Don’t you delude. yourself with that pees idea,” ‘rejoined Mr. Butterworth, grin- 3 ning. ‘ You'll be expected to do your _ share—nurse it now and then, and give = te your ‘tick-tick’ to play with. I 2 es -shouldn’t wonder but what you'll be asked to give it a bath sometimes. Tl” eS dene in some_ ‘evening and get some pointers.” Mr. Scales’s expression of disgust was cs — + re . Ushi x obliged to leave the room hurriedly to avert a serious breach of friendship. When Mr. Scales returned home that evening, he found the baby enshrined in the drawing-room, and being ministered to by. three slavish idolators. - It was not an attractive child, being face, and a pair of glassy | eyes, which — SMared at its host in an oddly disconcert- ing fashion. | --“QOh, George!” cried Mrs. Scales, who, “kneeling beside the baby, was ma- king strange noises with her lips, ‘did you ever see such a little darling?” Mr. Scales’s reply was a discreet and ae non-commital cough. = “What is it?” he inquired, turning to the mother. — _ _“Tt’s a human being,” replied Mrs. - Trenter sharply. ‘“ What did you think — it was—a monkey?’ os Mr. Scales thought it icoked uncom- monly like a monkey, but out of defer- ence to a mother’s feelings forebore to ‘Say so. — — “T didn’t mean that,” he said, flush- ‘ing. “TI mean is it a boy or a girl? z _ “ H-he,” said Mrs. Trenter, strongly = oa the pronoun by vey of em-— _ phasis—‘“‘h-he is a boy.” - ee - “Oh, indeed!” replied Mr. Sa - gloomily, remembering Mr. _ worth’s generalization. Scales — Butter- | be helped, but checked himself in time. a = Que a nice baby,” ‘he remarked. ) ta? ve x yy AU A ( undersized, with a small, brown, SS a hotel. He was about to add that it couldn’t ae ae His t tone was noticeably devoid of en- : thusiasm, but Cousin Almira aeeepred Te amende. oe “Will 00 give Cousin George a nice- kiss?’ she said, addressing the infant. “T don’t think I’d better,” Mr. Scales interrupted hurriedly. “‘ Fact is I’ve been smoking some pretty strong cigars, and it might make it—I mean him—_ sick.”’ . | _ He pulled aiichis watch, and mutter- = ing something about dressing for es made his escape. = To his consternation the baby ap- peared at the dinner-table, seated in its _tngibers: lapis S ‘He tried not. to look at it, but it. held | an extraordinary fascina tion for kim. He ~ could not keep his eyes off it, ae its es aoe too much for his gravity, and he was performances with a_ _piece of crumby ~ with a soft bis- cuit, seriously impaired 1 is appetite. ; “JT won't have it,” he declared ex- plosively, when he was alone with his wife, after a most trying evening. = bread, and subsequently © Vou’ ve got to keep that baby out of my way, or- T’ll leave town or take rooms at And don’t you have it at dinner = again. It makes me sick.” “_ ‘ se “ But it’s such a lovely little thing, Z George,” urged Mrs. Scales, With "9 = ses covert smile into the mirror. ay ee ‘Tt isn't cried Mr. ‘Scales, wrens ing off his collar, as if. he were strangling _ the object of his wrath. “Isawalotof babies this morning—took particular no- | tice of them—and this one’s the ugliest of the bunch. It’s done everything but yell, and I suppose— _ There, what did I tell you? Se es _A shrill ery arose. from- an adjoining room. sf Really, Georse® ae Mrs. Scales sharply, “you are insufferable. Please don’t swear like that. You needn’t dis- — tress yourself. After to-night you won't know that there is a baby in the house.” _“ Won't I?” replied the husband. grim ly, with a gesture of the hand in the di- — rection of the disturbing sound. “ ‘Do eee you propose to buy a gag?” SS An abrupt cessation of the “ery ane ae a look of relief and pleasure to his face. é By ginger,’ Re Be ‘elieve Sie as = — =