Adventure Magazine Cover — page 9: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE BUCKAROO “I’ve seen more than eight thousand, I'll tell yuh that. I’ve had—” “Now, Doc,’ warned Eskimo. ‘“Seein’ and havin’ are two different things. We all know that yuh came from a wealthy family, who gave yuh everythin’ yuh wanted, and nothin’ yuh needed. But if you ever try to make us believe that you had eight thou- sand dollars, we’ll sure as kick yuh out of our Sunday-school, because yuh never came by it honestly.” “Veah, and yuh don’t need to say we ain’t got no Sunday-school,”’ added Oyster hastily. “Last Sunday—”’ “T heard about it.” The bartender carefully polished a glass, breathing delicately upon it the while. “Lemme have that glass a minute,” said Johnny, and the unsuspecting bartender gave itto him. Johnny selected a place on the bar-rail and proceeded to smash the glass. “What the did yuh do that for?” demanded the bartender hotly. “What for?’ Johnny lifted his brows and stared at the bartender with innocent eyes. ‘““Yea-a-ah! Why smash that glass?” “Well, yuh can’t expect anybody to ever drink out of it, could yuh? After you yawnin’ upon it thataway, Doc. I know— well I don’t want to draw it.” “(____ that don’t hurt the glass!”’ “Well, of all things!’ shrilled Oyster. ‘“‘As long as the glass don’t get hurt, every- thin’ is all right. Il betcha he’s yawned upon every glass he’s got. If we was ever goin’ to drink in this place again, I’d argue in favor of smashin’ every glass he’s got on that back bar.’’ And the bartender knew that the AK out- fit were entirely capable of doing just such a thing. But they were not quite drunk enough to accept Oyster’s suggestion. At any rate their minds were diverted by the entrance of ‘Scotty’? Olson, the big lum- bering sheriff of Blue Wells, whose sense of humor was not quite as big nor as lively as a fever germ. Scotty wore a buffalo-horn mustache, which matched the huge eyebrows that shaded his little eyes. He was a powerful person, huge of hand, heavy-voiced; rather favoring a sawed-off, double-barreled shot- gun, which he handled with one hand. “The law is among us,” said Johnny OF BLUE WELLS 7 seriously. ‘‘Have a little drink, Mister Law?” “No.” Scotty was without finesse. “Have a cigar?’ asked Eskimo. “No.” “Have a chaw?” queried Oyster pleas- antly. “No. I was just talkin’ with the preacher.” “Tryin’ to reform yuh?” asked Johnny. “Reform? No. He wants to know which one of you punchers tin-canned his horse?” The three cowboys looked at each other. Their expression of amazement was rather overdone. The bartender chuckled, and Johnny turned quickly. “What in —— is so funny about it, Doc?” he demanded. “It’s no laughin’ matter, I’d tell a man,” he turned to the sheriff. “You surely don’t think we’d do a thing like that, Sheriff.” “T dunno,” the sheriff scratched his head, tilting his hat down over one eye. “My -——, that would be sacrilege!’ exclaimed Eskimo. “The Last Warnin’,” corrected Oyster seriously, not knowing the meaning of sacrilege. The Last Warnin’ was an an- cient sway-backed white horse, which the minister drove to an old wobble-wheeled buggy. He had a mean eye and a propen- sity for digging his old hammer-shaped head into the restaurant garbage cans. “Tt ain’t funny,” said the sheriff. ‘““There ain’t nothin’ funny about tin-cannin’ a horse. Louie Sing’s big copper slop-can is missin’, and Louie swears that he’s goin’ to sue the preacher. I reckon it’s up to you boys to pay the preacher for his horse and Louie Sing for his copper can. The preacher says that fifty is about right for the horse, and Louie swears that he can’t replace the can for less than ten.” “Well,” sighed Johnny, ‘‘all I can say is that you and the preacher and the Chink are plumb loco, if you think we’re goin’ to pay sixty dollars for a—for somethin’ we never done.” ‘“‘Where’d we get sixty dollars—even if we was guilty?’ wondered Oyster. “Yuh might make it in Sunday-school,” suggested the bartender. “In Sunday-school? What do yuh mean?” “Well,” grinned Doc, “I hear that one of yuh put a four-bit piece in the collection MICLOO© S (C@