Adventure Magazine Cover — page 114: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

108 breath, “I’m goin’ to drink what’s left of this here Highland dew without takin’ the bottle from my lips.” “Not without a whole lot of help from high Heaven, you won't!” Ole yells as me an’ him closes in simultaneous. Omittin’ all the ghastly details, I’ll jes’ say that Michael gets hit three times—a pippin of a jolt on each side of the jaw, contributed by me an’ Ole, an’ once more when the floor rares up an’ smacks him in the face. An’ I’m claimin’ some small credit for the singleness of purpose of all three of us when I say that the frument with the lemon color an’ the grapefruit tint emerges from the fray kinder shaken up, so to speak, but with nary drop missin’. Then, like the Gaul that Mr. Cesar men- tions, the conversation water is right away divided into three parts. -) SHE was good an’ noble liquor. It 4 ain’t no more’n five minutes till we i all got nothin’ but the kindest of feelin’s for ourselves an’ each other. An’ she’s lastin’. For more’n an hour that Scotch successfully combats the cussedness of them two an’ makes them appear in the light of reg’lar, ordinary human bein’s. It even gets a toe-hold on my better judgment, befuddlin’ me to the point where I get light- headed enough to hope that the rest of the - evenin’ passes off smooth an’ harmonious. An’ then Michael Joseph antes. “T’m goin’ to bed,” he announces, yawn- in’. “I’m sleepy.” “What for do you want to go to bed for?” the Swede snaps, real peevish. ‘‘Why don’t you wait up an’ go to bed like other folks? But, no—you gotta go to roost real early so’s you can wake up a couple of hours be- fore breakfast. That gives you a hiyu chance to roll an’ toss around an’ bust up the best part of my rest.” ’Course right there I make another bobble. “T got plenty blankets,” I tell ’em. “You- all can bunk separate if you’re so minded.” “Half of each one of our blankets is mine,” Michael Joseph informs me. “An’ I’m sure goin’ to slumber on my own bed- ~din’—right now!” + “All of them remarks goes for me,” the Swede allows. ‘An’ i’m warnin’ you-all that I craves repose an’ I intends to sleep.”’ Well, the extry bunk bein’ -a one-man affair, they make down a bed on the floor an’ turn in. It ain’t more’n seven-thirty; Adventure but figgerin’ that if I set up an’ read the light keeps them two lunatics awake, I blow the candle an’ turn in myself. I ain’t takin’ no chances. The quicker them sap-heads goes to sleep the better show I got of coaxin’ the dove of peace to flutter back an’ resume his perch on my ridge-pole. An’ in about five minutes I get to fig- gerin’ that that is jes’ what said pigeon has done. For the Swede starts snorin’! An’, believe me, while I’m ready to vote an’ repeat for any law that places snorin’ right ahead of manslaughter, that Swede’s gur- glin’ rumble is music to me. Him bein’ the original objector to Michael’s early retirin’, it’s a cinch the Irishman has already gone by-by, an’ the night’s wranglin’-bee dies for lack of nourishment. Thinkin’ them thoughts is so soothin’ to me, that, in spite of the fearful noises Ole emits, me.an’ the Sandman is purty soon ’way off on the other side of nowhere. Every- thing’s fine. I must have been asleep mighty near five minutes when J hear somebody yelhn’. Course, it’s Michael Joseph. “Hey, you,” he hollers, “shut up! Cut it out! What do you-all mean by tryin’ to strangle yourself thataway an’ shatterin’ my repose? You done got me so nervous I’m liable to bust you right in the mush!” “Try it,” the Swede invites, sittin’ up. “An’ don’t you wake me up no more,” he warns. “I’m ain’t goin’ to stand for it. You bald-faced dough-head, you know what you done? You jes’ busted up the best dream I ever had in my whole life!” “Yah!” Michael jeers. “It sure must have been some sweet vision. Why, you funny-faced liar, I know durn well that from the awful noises you was makin’ you was dreamin’ about nothin’ less’n murder an’ sudden death.” 3 “T sure was,” the Swede assents. “I done dreamt that I took a crack at you with the ax an’ you laid down an’ died!” ‘“‘Ain’t that nice?” Michael sneers. ‘Well, lemme tell you somethin’: I ain’t so de- funct but what I’m goin’ to stop you from havin’ all the fun in this life. You ain’t goin’ to snore into my ear no more. I’m goin’ to put a detale skookum kibosh on your vociferous entertainment, right now!” With that, he turns himself end for end . an’ lays down with his feet at Ole’s head. “Now, you wall-eyed pike, snore till you're blue in the gills,” he urges. Eomichoo CS (EO) A)