Adventure Magazine Cover — page 138: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

=- ». _— “Now, what—er—procedure do we adopt?” asks Pettingill. . “Say that again,” says Dirty. ‘“‘I missed it a foot.” 7 “What are we supposed to do in a case of this kind?” “Oh ——!” says Dirty, and then he cranes his neck. “Look what’s going on down there!” mi We sees four punchers riding toward them sheep, sort of swinging around to get between them and the creek. They bunches the whole works, and proceeds to drift ’em over the hill. I recognizes one of em as Sandy Sorensen, on the roan, so I reckon it got home all right. “Exactly,” nods Pettingill, wiping his glasses. ‘‘No doubt everything is all right, but just why are those men taking away our sheep?” “Gents,” says Dirty, rolling a smoke, “‘you have witnessed the theft of a few hun- dred sheep. With your own eyes you have- _ seen part of your herd swiped by outlaws. It is a common occurrence hereabouts.”’ “(Do you mean that we have been robbed in the broad light of day?” asks Pettingill, shocked-like. “You do? Well, I am amazed!’’ “Yes,” says Dirty. “It is such things that help to make us crazy.” Maybe I could tell more of this tale; maybe not. Professor Pettingill knows things that I don’t, so I’ll let him tell the rest of the tale as he told it to his friends. Folks, meet Professor Pettingill, who is now going to talk. MR. HARPER’S tale, up to the Bie present, is partly true, or as Dirty Shirt says, “Near the truth as Ike ever told anything.”’ I objected to the word “pelican” as applied to Professor Mid- dleton and myself, but Ikefassured me that it was a term of endearment, so I will let it remain. Many of their quaint phrases are in my note-book, but as yet I have not had time to investigate their meaning. Their vo- cabulary of profanity seemed unlimited, and at times very amusing. It seems that they had little reverence for the finer things of life, and when we gently remonstrated with them, the one called Dirty Shirt said: “Oh, go to ——! What do you think this is—a ladies’ cemetery?” aA / ~ ~ See ae ; a a: ce ure I as yet fail to see the reference to a burial-place. . As Mr. Harper has already told you, we sat on the slope of the hill and watched the outlaws purloin part of the flock. I believe that my ancestors were fighting- stock, for my gorge arose at the sight, and I was filled with visions of revenge. Per- haps it was the spirit of the West that possessed me, but at any rate I arose and shook a folded fist in their direction. “Go ahead and cuss, professor,” said Dirty Shirt. “If you get stuck for a word, maybe me or Ike can supply it.” Now, I am going to make no attempt to quote them. At times they talk in academic English, and at other times a jargon. Professor Middleton will bear me out in saying that their language is both weird and wonderful, and also easy to acquire. I am sure that our friends were shocked at our conversation when we related our experiences, and it required constant vigi- lance over our tongues to keep from—as Ike said—“ talking like a he-man.” I feel, that Middleton was a worse offender than I in that respect. I said to Dirty Shirt— . ‘We shall most surely follow them an recover our property, shall we not?” “Not,” answered Ike. I am leaving off the prefix “Mr.” as they rarely use it in conversation. “But,” said I, “it is a plain case of theft, is It not?” “Well,” replied Dirty Shirt, “you can call it anything from petty larceny to train robbery, professor, but. Pll be —— if I ever was so fond of sheep that I’d sacrifice my skin in their interests.” “Do you mean you are going to let them keep the sheep?” asked Middleton. ‘“»-—’g delight!’’ exclaimed Dirty Shirt. “You still talking sheep? Let’s go back to the rag shanty and scare up a feed.” So back we went. They showed no worry over the loss of the sheep, and I am cer- tain they must be of value. The chops alone would be worth— But why quote prices? They led us back to the tent, and tuen Dirty Shirt said: “Tf you pelicans want to be regular shep- herds you’ve got to learn how to cook. See what you can find in your own packs and then scare up a batch of biscuits.” Our pack-luggage had been stacked in front of the tent, and as I walked over cS ooo) A oer Pete We he 5 7 ~“ aed ~~ % Pe -_™ =e SES ae IE eS,