Rosa Lambert — page 253: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

a ee eee eee es, . ee ee eee — could not in a moment settle my t chouphts in any positive or decisive manner. Several days passed; and one afternoon Mr. Nellesley was announced. He remained con- versing with me for about half-an-hour,—treating me with the same respectful but friendly cour tesy which he had previously observed towards me, and evidently thinking that [ was a married woman and of honourable character. It was this idea which rendered his subsequent visits less frequent than his inclinations would have otherwise pro: mpted him to pay them: for he was gradually conceiving an attachment towards me, the evi- dences of which pecped forth notwithst: anding his endeavour to conceal them. ‘Thus six weeks passed away from the date of the frightful atrocity at Woolwich: it was now the end of March ; and though I was four months gone in the family way, yet my condition was still perfectly easy of concealment. One afternoon, at the expiration of that interval, IT was walking in the garden, when I felt such a sudden indisposition come over me that I was compelled to re-enter the house and lie down upon the sofa in the drawing-room. I few minutes that sensation of illness passed away as suddenly as it came: and I was well again. I took up a book—but had not been reading it a quarter of am hour, when Mr. Wellesley was announced. He looked pale and melancholy, though he endea- voured to assume cheerfulness of spirits : but I comprehended full well what was passing in his mind. He loved me, and he believed this love to be entirely hopeless: he thought that I was an honourably wedded wife, and he dared not address me in the language of passion. is manner was embarrassed; and after the first compliments were exchanged and a few observations had passed, he sat silent for several minutes in an abstracted mood. All this to me was so awkward that I was perfectly at a loss how to act. Though I had fathomed. Felix Wellesley’s soul, yet I ‘of course could not make any remark in connexion with so delicate a topic. I therefore felt the necessity of measuring every word before it was uttered, and keeping a rigid control over my looks, lest inad- vertence or unguardedness should be taken as en- couragement, Mr. Welles ley seemed all in a moment to feel that his silence must be strange and his position ridiculous; and he made some observation with a suddenness which startled me. Again did that abyupt sensation of illness which I had a little while back experienced, seize upon me, accom- panied with such a dizziness and faintness that I vainly struggled to shake them off. Life appeared to be perishing out of me: I remember that J gave a low moan—and then I fell back on the sofa, consciousness abandoning me. ‘This swoon, as [ afterwards learnt, lasted for nearly an hour,— during which restoratives were at first vainly ap- plied. When I came back to my senses 1 was lying on the sofa,-—-my maid on one side—a me- dical man on the other; my garments were all loosened, the stay-lace having been cul. Jor several minutes my thoughts were all in con- fusion: but as they gradually settled themselves in my brain, the idea stole in amongst them that my condition could not possibly be any longer a secret, A burning blush suffused my countenance, accom. + ore eee ees LE LO TE PALO AOE AL ALLY LOL A OEE LOE OT oP . ROSA LAMBERT. asad oe natal ennai ital Pe err errer ee a ee ee — —— oe panied by a strong spasmodic sensation whieh an. peared to galvanize me; and [ throw my looks around to see if Felix Wellesley wera still in the room. But ho was not there; and a second thought told me that for delicacy’s sake he must have with- drawn when my garments were disordered by the loosening of them to give me air aad relief. The medical man now gently observed that I should be better presently, and that he would send me some medicine,—adding in a still lower tone, that the swoon was attributable to my condition. Again did that blush overspread my countenance : the surgeon took his departure—and I was left with my maid. I scarcely dared raise my eyes to her countenance: but when I did, I saw that she also felt troubled and embarrassed, as if it were a painful thing for her to know that [ had proved unfaithful to him whom she, as well as the other domestics, believed to be my husband. But all in an instant my courage revived: I felt that a crisis had come, and that it was now necessary to con- quer that vacillation in which for weeks past I had been hovering, and to adopt some decisive course in respect to Captain Beaumont. ‘You now know my secret,” I said to the maid. “ But tell me at once—has a syllable been breathed to the other servants ?” * No, ma'am,” was the response given with much evident sincerity. ‘ Not for worlds would +> O caaitaee: “ You are a good young woman,” I interrupted her; “and I thank you. Mr. Wellesley Ah! I perceive by your countenance that he knows it 1? “Why, you see, ma’am,”’ said the maid, “ it happened very unfortunate. All of a sudden the bell xang, and [ hastened to the room, I found you as thought dead, and Mr, Wellesley gl distracted and. bewildered. I begged him for a doctor; and he ran off as if for his le I sprinkled water on your face—for I saw that you wefe not really dead—but all to no purpose. Ina few minutes Mr. Wellesley came back with the surgeon ; and he almost immediately said that the swoon arose from the condition you were in. I looked astounded ie me for speaking so frankly : | “Go on,” I said: “I side you to tell me every- thing that took place.” Well, ma’am, the doctor at once ordered me to loosen your garments; and Mr. Wellesley re- reated to the end of the room—for he was very much agitated and seemed as if he did not know what to do. The doctor asked me how far you were advanced ?—and then I begged Mr. Wellesley to withdraw—which he of course did, saying that he shoulc call again in the evening to inquire after you. ‘he doctor seemed surprised that I should look as I did: for he did not know that— that———-” “That Captain Beaumont had been absent since the middle of last year,” woman hesitated. “ T dropped a hint, ma’am,” she continued, “ for the doctor not to say a word to anybody about it; and ho at once understood what I meant. He treated if yery coolly, observing that these things were not unusual in his professional experience,— [ said, perceiving that the adding that medical men never grrsiped on these points.” (eco)