Pickwick Abroad; or, The Tour in France — page 358: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PICKWICK ABROAD. 8345 that brandy with you now? IfI were not convinced that you were a gentleman who had been most vilely duped, I should have arrested you as a conspirator in the fraud which was practised wpon the land-« Jord at Amiens, and which was discovered a few hours after your de- parture from that city; for the real Count Smoloski, for whom the money was destined, arrived there and was arrested by the police. Lhe whole affair was then explained.” ‘And wherefore was the Count arrested ?”? demanded Mr. Snod- grass, when he had expressed his delight at meeting with M. Dumont. ‘‘ Merely to be re-conducted to Calais and sent back to England,” was the answer. ‘‘ He is a Polish refugee, and therefore cannot be allowed to remain in France, so long as his mind is perpetually bent upon revolutions and conspiracies. But, to return to what I was say- ing just now,—is not the whole adventure a combination of the most singular coincidences ?”’ “Very,” rejoined Mr. Snodgrass: ‘‘ but Iam sorry for Mr. Law- son’s loss.”’ “On second thoughts ’'m glad of it,” said that gentleman. “The account of the whole ailair will get into the London as well as the Paris papers, and will be the best advertisement I could have for my hotel.” “Indeed! Well—I should never have thought of that,” exclaimed Mr. Snodgrass. “Oh! yes,” returned Mr. Lawson, helping himself to some more brandy-and-water. “‘ Why, when I first came imto this place, the custom was so slack and the business so dull, that I actually thought of setting fire to one of the wings of the hotel to create notoriety.” “That would have been very expensive, would it not?” said Mr. Snodgrass, a little astonished at what he heard. “‘ tt would rather,” answered Mr. Lawson; ‘*so what do you think Y did?” “1 really can’t guess,’ observed Mr. Snodgrass. “ Set yourself on fire, perhaps; or, may be, your head waiter?” “Oh! no—not quite so green as that,” returned Mr. Lawson. ** But I hired an English gentleman, who was reported to have lost a large sum of money at I’rescati’s, to attempt suicide in the principal suite of apartments. A subscription was raised for him, and all his acquaintances went to condole with him. For a whole fortnight he ate three breakfasts and five dinners every day.” ‘‘ Flow was that?” demanded Mr. Snodgrass in increased astonish- ment. ‘* Why, every time any ilustrious person, such as the Bishop, or an attache to the Embassy, called upon him,” explained Mr. Lawson, “up went the best breakfast or dmner that could be provided, accord- ing to the time of the day; and as his visitors were sure to question him about the charges, he always replied ‘ that they were so moderate it was a wonder how Lawson could do it for the money.’ I attribute nearly all my business to that happy idea of the attempt at suicide.” ‘Most extraordinary!” exclaimed Mr. Snodgrass. ‘‘ But is this ‘sort of thing usual in France amongst the hotel-keepers ?” _ * And in England as well,” returned Mr. Lawson, “ J should hope.” A desultory conversation in this style wiled away the time tilleight 34 EomMmichbooks (E(@) =)