Pickwick Abroad: A Companion to the Pickwick Papers — page 66: what you’re looking at

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o6 “T purpose calling on Mr. Crashem to- day,” said Mr. Pickwick, after a pause, dur- ing which he emerged from his bed. “ Hem !” said Mr. Weller, dubiously, and leisurely desisting from his occupation of laying with his copper watch-chain. | “ What did you say, Sam ?” cried his mas- ter . 9 “JT merely said ‘hem, sir,” returned the valet, drily. | “ And why did you say ‘hem ?” demand- ed Mr. Pickwick, as he applied an immense lather-brush to his expressive face. “Cos, sir,” answered Mr. Weller, “ he ain’t no good, ’[m weary much afeerd. His name’s veared out, the vaggibund! on my books, as the sheriff’s officer said ven he refused to take Bill Styles’s bail for the gentleman in trouble.” i: _ “Tm sorry to hear you talk in this way, Sam,” said Mr. Pickwick, casting a solemn glance at his faithful attendant. “ Can’t help von’s thoughts, sir,” continued Mr. Weller: “an my o-pinion o’ Mr. Crash- em is, that he’s like a reg’lar dealer in de- ceptions, in a hallegorical sense.” “ A story-teller I suppose, Sam ?” inquired Mr. Pickwick. . “ Just like von o’ them chaps as sells brass OnvaTenie for gold vons,” explained Mr. Wel- er. , “ Ah!” cried Mr. Pickwick, who probably more than half suspected that his sagacious servant was not far wrong., “ But he is a stranger in a strange land, Sam—he has no friends—” “ Exactly vot the costermonger remarked, ven he yolloped his donkey, sir,” ejaculated Mr. Wella, by way of illustrating his mas- ter’s observation. “T therefore shall not desert him,” con- tinued Mr. Pickwick. At this moment, Messrs. Tupman, Win- kle, and Roozie entered the room, and were most graciously received by the amiable Mr, Pickwick, “Gen leman bin here, sir,” said Mr. Wel- ler. “ Who was it, Sam ?” inquired Mr. Pick- wick, seating himself by the side of a wood fire, which seemed to be as obstinately in- clined as ever three dead logs with one cubic inch of hot cinder between them ever yet did. “ Johnny Darmy, sir,” returned Mr. Wel- ler, in a certain epigramatic style into which he occasionally relapsed. “Ah!? said Mr. Pickwick: “and did he * PICKWICK ABROAD. leave any message ?”—for the intelligent hero of this narrative, with his usual com-- prehensive powers, immediately suspected the name of his visitor. “Left this ’ere note, sir,” answered Mr. Weller, “and said he vouldn’t take no refu- sal votsoever ; vich vos precisely the obser- wation made by the mas’er chimbley-sveep, ven he pushed the little tiny boy up the chimbley.” , “Indeed !” said Mr. Pickwick, with a shudder: “are chimney-sweepers so cruel as all that, Sam 2” | “Them and costermongers, sir,” replied Mr. Weller, “is the most hard-hartedest brutes a-livin’, if ve ex-cept the chaps as drives the dog-carts. None on ’em ever ends any-veres, save at the gallows.” ah. “Very strange!’ cried Mr. Pickwick, opening the note, and perusing its contents from the date to the signature, | “What does it say ?” inquired Mr. Win- kle, when he observed the bland and placid smile that played upon the lips of his lead- er. \) “Tt regards Tupman, principally,” said Mr. Pickwick, with a little hesitation. “ But as it would be ridiculous, Tupman,” contin- ued he, “to keep the affair any longer se- cret from our mutual friends, I may as well take this opportunity of acquainting them with the villainous robbery that was com- mitted upon you. Sam, you*’may with- draw.” Mr. Tupman bowed submissively as Mr. Pickwick addressed him, and Mr. Weller forthwith obeyed the imperial ukase that | dismissed him from the presence. Mr. Pick- wick then made a few preliminary and lu- cidly explanatory observations, for the es- pecial edification of Messieurs Boozie and Winkle; at the termination of which he informed his audience that the note he held in his hand was from their mutual friend Dumont, and that its contents, expunged of all grammatical errors—it being written in English—were as follows : “My dear sir,—Information having been privately given at the Prefecture de Police, that a most audacious and extensive rob- bery was committed on the person of Mr. Tupman, a few evenings ago, I am inclined to think that the gold watch may probably be recovered. In order to advise with you on this subject, I took the liberty of calling this morning, but was not fortunate enough to find you at home. I shall therefore do ‘5 wis we Go LOC) <S (C©)