The Mysteries of London; or, Lights and Shadows of London Life — page 76: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

———— —- _— “ Try our Five Shilling Mized”—*“ and I have some satisfaction in knowing my services in this way are generally acknowledged.” | Acknowledged!” ejaculated Chnckers; “if the citizens of London properly appreciated your assist~ ance they would erecta statue to your honour in the very centre of the Royal Exchange, and call it ‘Grige’s Monument.’ To my knowledge, half the tradesmen about here would have been bankrupts long ago if you had not stepped in to the rescue, and given a fillip tothe retail. It was the beautiful curve in the loop of the word ‘Sugar’ that saved Widgetts, the grocer, from closing his doors, I am convinced. I saw a rival tea-dealer look at it with a jealous eye and then burst into tears,—the look of that Jabel com- pletely overpowered him. By the bye, Grigg, what does the general demand go for now?” “ Why,” replied the ticket-writer, “I think just at present the ‘ Alarming Failures,’ and ‘Must be sold off to-morrow’s,’ are the leading article, but the ‘under prime costs’ move off very briskly, and are about as profitable as any. A customer of mine in the linen-drapery business told me this morning that if | brought him two more such excellent ‘ Ruinous Sacrifices’ as I supplied him with before, they would make his fortune, and he would consider me in the payment for them accordingly.” “You see,” remarked Chuckers, turning round to Thornton, “ what I said was nomore than he deserved ; but though Mr, Grigg was the original inventor of the famous ticket of the large figure with the little one dropped into the corner, I am proud to say he is not above taking a suggestion from me occasionally. ‘Stunning,’ ‘Here’s a Chance,’ and ‘The Regular Out-and-Outer,’ are three hints of mine, which I am pleased to hear have not been altogether without their use to the shops where they are now collecting a great crowd every day. Mr. Grigg admitted his obligations to the inventive ingenuity of his friend, and more compliments passed on both sides, till the clock of a neighbouring church striking nine, Bob suggested that it was time to dress, and the bundles were brought forth and unpacked accordingly. How the change of apparel was found to be with each of them a matter of considerable difficulty; how an unforeseen embarrassment arose from Mr, Chuckers’ discovering that his brigand’s jacket was considerably too large; how he was compelled, in consequence, to retain an undue portion of his proper habiliments underneath, that gave a peculiarly punchy appear- ance to his body; how Thornton succeeded, at last, in clothing himself in the less intricate garb of the countryman; and how the ticket-writer, in the belief that he was assisting each, only retarded the toilet of both, by forcing the white felt hat on to the head of the brigand, and insisting upon the legs of Thornton being enveloped in the cross~barred, sandalled spatter- dashes, characteristic of the Italian robber—may all be passed over as incidents inseparable from such ex- periments, but which are not to be considered neces- sary for a distinct and elaborate record. “Rather odd sort of looking-glass this of yours, Grigg, isn’t it?” observed Mr. Chuckers, as, having fixed the sugar-loaf hat upon his head, and attached the false corkscrew ringlets thereto, he now began to darken his eyebrows with a burnt cork,—“ it makes one squint, don’t it?” “ Well, I always thought it cast a queer reflection,” gaid its owner, examining the refractory mirror with y warranted’ to a pawnbroker, who wouldn’t pay, so I was Obliged to take that out for the money. But, bless me, what a singular appearance you do present, to be sure!” and Mr. Grigg having looked with wonderment on the face before him, was so tickled by the sight that he went off into roars of immoderate riment. Bob, misled by the oblique reflection of the glass, in a vain attempt to manufacture a pair of formidable ‘transversely over each cheek, which had assumed an likely to produce that ferocious and imposing aspect which Mr. Chuckers desired his visage should present, were soon effaced, and, with the help of the assiduous artist in tickets, the proper amount of foreign ferocity was at last successfully imparted to the countenance of the aspiring masquerader. supper off ham and beef, provided at the expense of his visitors, but brought by Mr. Grigg from a cele- brated cook-shop round the corner. With this he had also furnished a plentiful supply of porter, the warfare amongst the stray slices of ham that - - ———~— THE MYSTERIES OF LONDON. flourishing blue capitals, deeply shaded with black, | Se ee 2...” more attention; “ but I sold six dozen ‘all these laughter. There was certainly a sufficient cause for his mer- mustachios, had carried the black line appearance in consequence that was any thing but The marks of this blundering achievement, however, In accordance with a preconcerted arrangement, designed with a commendable notion of economy, the party now proceeded to regale themselves with a ticket-writer by no means considering it derogatory to his dignity to be himself the messenger on these occasions, and, indeed, proving its necessity by hinting that had the servant of the establishment departed on such a mission, the beverage would most probably have been subject to a rapid evaporation on the road. With these temptations before them, the brigand and the countryman commenced an active attack upon the viands; and it was amusing to behold the knife of Mr. Chuckers, as he sat arrayed in his pic- turesque costume, keeping up a sort of guerilla were rapidly transferred from the dish to his plate; and it was not the less interesting to notice the dexterity with which, in conveying the pewter measure to his lips, he contrived to avoid the effect of the moisture on the artificial imperial he had created. As for Thornton, he was as heartily enter- tained with the strange figure his companion pre- sented, and the novel metamorphosis he had himself undergone, as he expected to be with the future inci- dents of the evening. Indeed, it was with no little regret that he left the obliging Mr. Grigg, who had been tweaking his nose into remarkable redness at the ~ constant ebullitions of merriment in which the face- tious Mr. Chuckers indulged, and hurried away with his companion down to the cab which had been in- structed to wait for them at the door. msi “ Good bye,” said Chuckers, as soon as he had got seated in the vehicle, into which he had plunged from off the doorstep with reckless desperation; “we shall be back to breakfast with you, mind, by six in the morning.” = “T shall expect you,” answered Grigg, smiling gra- ciously, as he waved an adieu; and the cab drove off at a furious rate, to the infinite delight of half-a-dozen little boys who were playing in the stteet at the time, and who, having caught a glimpse, in the lamplight, of a fierce physiognomy crowred by a hat of an unusual | character, gut up a vociferous cheer, under the faint impression that some great foreign potentate was on a visit to this country, and had favoured Mr, Grigg with a call, — <<. ee eS a