The Mysteries of the Court of London — page 140: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

aecompaa Her ladyahip paused for a few moments, and thea , damced—-I never would give the slightest encourage- resumed the narration of her wild and siagular | ment to that homage which a young lady in my But even in thus maintaining os rigid « guard x wayward moods—I may even be pardon denominate them infirmities. I loved him so iE | | most adoring of men; and for such sn amount of love I could well afford to endure the eccentri- | foreanw that still more potent impuless would be cities into which my husband might be betrayed | given to the Harl’s ececntricitics of temper: but on q S of that passion. Time wore that my noeg before | dust was made a reproach! Nevertheless, every ; f F ] | en—and JI found marriage in respect to the Earl's temper, were | motive of prudence as well as my ewn navaral in. . perpetuated afterwards; and the two great objects | clinetion suggested a perseverance in the latter of my care were to avoid giving him the slightest | courses: and I did persevere. . all the power of woman’s devotion, he seemed not tu give me credit for truth-| “ Yes, my dear lady,” responded the faithfal de. fulness. Frequently, when in the midst of a calm | pendant, “you have indeed lifted a veil from the and tranquil conversation, he would suddenly etart Earls character. I understand him fully now!: up from hig seat, fix hig looks upon me, and vehe- | The love which ‘he expesicneed for you wae se im- mently proclaim that he was guilty of a crime in | passioned and enthusiasts as te be absolutely selfish loving me with euch an intensity of passion; for! —aend it rendered him a tyrant. He fancied that that I had besome the idol of his worehip, and that | yeu ought not to east a look, harbour an ides, or he was an idolator! The essurance of such an even respire a breath that had not some reference illimitable love would have been joyous inatead of to himself:—to him you were to be all in all—tu saddening: but it was accompanied with such , identify with his feclinge--to dream, to strange vebemence of mamner—ead I may even think, to look, to speak enly beneath the dominant’ add, with looks so tersible—that I was both fright- , influence of love. You were to be ald love—to make ened and afilicted. And then, because I turned your wedded life one unceasing boneymoon! And pele or instinctively shrank back, he would taunt ‘it was natural sed, it was inevitabla—that a me with coldness—with want of affection—even | man of euch a diaposition should torture himself with harbouring a sentiment of aversion towards ' and you with @ thausand phantom fears—e thou- him. At other times he would calmly and deliber- } sand ridiculous suepiciuns. I was to be a constant’ ately aseure me that if he theught I did not really | stady on both your parts to testify the love thus bove bim, he would fly from end bury | mutually felt: i¢ was not to be a love to flow on himeelf in some solitude, to brood over his woes in an even course like the uoruffled straam,—but in seoret. On such occasions as these I soarcely!to gush with oontinucus excitement—and the knew how to act: for if I entreated him to put greater its impetuosity, the better! And yet, my away such dreadful ideas from his mind, he would | ledy, the wereld suspected not that such was your angrily charge me with an attempt to tutor himself | lord’s disposition: the household suspected it not into the same indifference which he acoused me of: either. On the contrary, the Earl of Castlemaine feeling ;—and if, fharful of provoking words, I held ; has ever passed for a nobleman of a temperament my peace. he would then at once discover in that coldly reserved—may I venture to add, baughtily silence a proof of the very indifference of which I frigid ?” was scoused. In short, he conjured up «thousand; “Yes,” replied the Countess, “that is doubtless phantoms to haunt himeelf wherewith: the love his natural character in all things save with respect that he bore for me was a source of affliction in- | to the affection which he condvived for me. And stead of happiness to his own heart. Heaven! when the power of this love so mightily stirred up knows how carefully I studied to discipline my cun- the very depths of his soul, that outward composura duct—to regulate my very words and looks—a0 as on his part was still worn before the world as a Re TT Ee EO am «am @ _ - => ww —_ = eee EE lee, Qe eee COLL ( 5 DOO CS (GO)