The Young Duchess; or, Memoirs of a Lady of Quality — page 178: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

164 rushed from the room. An hour or two after- wards I received a letter from him, in which he most delicately, yet feelingly and kindly, as I thought, alluded to the unguarded ejaculation to which I had given vent, ‘that there were reasons why I could never marry.’ He said that if my affections had on some former occasion been en- gaged and blighted, it should be the study of his life to restore happiness unto my soul. He pro- ceeded to observe that if my weakness had been triumphed over by some unscrupulous villain, this need not be a barrier to our union, and that he should admire me all the more for the candour with which I was disposed to treat him. He con- cluded by declaring that. his own happiness was at stake, and by imploring me to reconsider my decision. I sent no answer to the letter, and fled at once from Paris, thinking that after such con- duct he would never approach me again, and that T should thereby be putting an end to an affair which had already grown to a point of serious perplexity and embarrassment. ‘I went to Madrid; but still I felt restless and unhappy. I loved Langport—passionately and devotedly loved him. Oh! how keenly, keenly I felt my position, which prevented me from accept- ing his addresses and becoming his wife! I now knew what love was: I found that I had only liked my deceased husband, but that he had never possessed that same hold upon my heart which Langport had obtained. I wept bitter, burning tears; and there were moments when I was even mad enough to think of writing to Langport, telling him the whole stupendous truth, trusting to his love, and throwing myself on his mercy. But when I thought of what I was, I rejected the idea with mingled horror and affright.—‘ Mise- rable personification of vanity that I] am,’ I thought to myself in my calm and reasonable moments; ‘it is not the woman as she really is whom Langport loves—but the woman as she seems to be!—and if I throw off my disguise and reveal myself in my true condition, will he not turn from me in disappointment, loathing, and disgust ? Yes!—I must abandon all these mad, these insane ideas which have been revolving in my brain of late!’ ‘“ Being, restless and unsettled, I was more accessible to caprices, whims, and fantasies than perhaps under other circumstances I should have been; and I resolved to travel to remote places. I went to Cairo and Constantinople; and at the latter city a strange occurrence took place—an incident so fraught with mystery that I have never been enabled to penetrate it— no, nor even to form the slightest conjecture that might lead to a solution of the enigma. I will enter into details. There is a splendid hotel at Con- gtantinople for the accommodation of foreigners, and it is kept by a Frenchman. It was there that I took up my quarters; and I soon received visits from the leading English families who were settled in the imperial city. The British Am- bassador’s wife left her card; and 1 was invited to a soirée at the Embassy. I went. The enter- tainment was a splendid one, and all the members nf the other foreign Embassies were present. Amongst them was Count Olonetz, the Russian Ambassador. He was an old man, with a severe intelligent countenance, courtly yet formal man- ners, and of distinguished appearance. It hap- ‘ejaculated, THE YOUNG DUCHESS; OR, MEMOIRS OF A LADY OF QUALITY. pened that in the course of the evening he was lounging with the English Ambassador round the principal apartment, where I was seated in com- pany with a French gentleman and lady whom I had known in Paris, and whom I now met in Constantinople. At the moment the two Am- bassadors approached, my French friends rose and hastened away from me, for they had just recognised an intimate acquaintance on the oppo- site side of the saloon—‘ Ah! ejaculated the British Ambassador, speaking in French, ‘ Miss Malcolm all alone by herself! Count,’ he con- tinued, turning towards the Russian diplomatist, ‘let me present you to a lady who is well acquainted with your country, and who speaks its language as well as you yourself. Miss Malcolm, my friend Count Olonetz.’—The Rus- sian gave a slight start for a moment, and then he bowed with formal politeness. The British Ambassador strolled away to another part of the room; and the Count, seating himself by my side, said, ‘And so, Miss Malcolm, you are well ac- quainted with Russia ?—‘I lived there for many years, my lord,’ was my answer; and we were speaking in the Muscovite tongue.—‘ Indeed,’ he ‘you do veritably pronounce our language like a native. —‘ And no wonder,’ I re- joined with a smile, ‘for I was brought up in Russia from my infancy.—‘ I know the name of Malcolm well,’ said the Ambassador.—‘ Ah?’ I observed: and then I remembered how he had given a slight start as if of recognition when my name was mentioned.—‘ Yes, the name of Mal- colm,’ he contined, ‘had an honourable repute in St. Petersburgh when it was borne by the great English merchant who was so long established there. Surely you cannot be a relation of that gentleman ?’—‘ Indeed,’ I answered, with another smile, ‘that gentleman was most nearly related to me: he was my father.’-—‘Your father?’ ex- claimed Count Olonetz; and methought he again started as he looked very hard at me. ‘How many children had he?—The question seemed strange; and without immediately replying to it, I inquired, ‘Did your Excellency know my father ?’—‘ Yes, a little,’ was his immediate re- sponse; ‘and methought that he had only one daughter living, who was looked upon as an heiress ?’——‘ Well,’ I said, smiling, ‘I am that daughter.’—‘ You?’ and he now started more visibly than before, so that I was seized with a sudden fright; for I thought to myself, ‘ At last my secret is detected! he has penetrated the im- posture! or at all events he sees enough of me to be convinced that I am not the young and hand- some Mildred whom he may have known in St. Petersburgh !’—‘ Pardon me,’ he instantaneously added, recovering his self-possession, and even smiling most affably ; ‘but it seemed to me so ex- traordinary that I should thus meet at Constan- tinople a young lady of whom I heard so much when at St. Petersburgh, that I was astonished to hear you were the same. May I ask if your mother is with you?’—‘My mother?’ and for a moment I felt as if I should drop at his feet.— ‘Ah, pardon me,’ he again said, with increasing politeness, and even kindness: ‘ perhaps I have touched upon a mournful topic, and you have had to deplore the death of your mother as well as your father?’—‘ Yes, my lord,’ I'said; ‘it is evident that you are ignorant of the fact that my YN Wn) COMO ee a eC I It I A nt te rn er tt ES Colin