The Child of Waterloo, or, The Horrors of the Battle-Field — page 304: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE CHILD OF WATERLOO. 301 And as for “ fat,” goodness gracious! think of her and a five- mile walk in the dog-days, and think of Shakespeare’s fat knight ‘‘larding the lean earth,” and you have some notion of her con- dition. And then for the ‘‘ furty” part of the business,—gentle reader, excuse us, this is forbidden ground. A Jady’s age is a thing quite sacred, and men have no business with it. For my part, I never heard rightly the age of any of the feminine gender after Efteen; after that period it was always wrapped in mystery, and it is difficult to come to the truth when that is the case. So, for our parts, we never even believe in a tombstone when we see the age mentioned on it, being convinced what was difficult to learn while the object was living was more difficult and apocry- phal when dead. ‘‘Well, Rafferty, what have you to say for bringing this un- fortunate friend of yours into trouble ?” “* Arrah! air ea peain dear, I have been in trouble myself— that is, I may be before I die; but I have been doing a little in the matrimonial line myself.” ‘ ‘‘ Eh, Rafferty ?” ‘‘T have been to the parish church, captain dear, and ladies and gentlemen, and this,” continued Rafferty, taking the fat hand of the blushing Phosbe—‘‘ and this is the bride?” ‘- The bride, Rafferty —did you say the bride?” ‘‘Bad cess to me, yer honor, if she’s any less.” ‘‘Then you’ve got married, Rafferty?” exclaimed Captain Morton, in extreme and almost ludicrous astonishment, ‘‘ Arrah! an yer honor’s just hit it; and why shouldn’t an old soldier get married as well as another man?” ‘¢Oh, certainly, Rafferty, certainly; no reason on earth why you should not get married, and I hope you will be happy wit your choice. You shall not be without my_good wishes, Raf- erty.” ‘‘T am sure of that, yer honor.” ‘* And of something more substantial too.” ‘“‘ Yer honor is always kind and generous,” said Rafferty; and turning to Mr. Henry Morton and to Mabel, he continued— ‘¢Muy yer honor live long and happily; and as for Miss Mabel— arrah! I mane Mrs. Henry Morton—I can never forget. I nursed her when she was a child, and, though a poor body, I shall always think of her as if she were my own child. May she live to be as happy as [am sure Mister Henry will try to make her.” ‘‘- You are right, my good Rafferty,” said Henry Morton, who could not hear unmoved, nor any one else, the words of the honest Irishman—‘“ you are right; she shal] and will be happy if it be in my power to make her so; and allow me to wish you, my honest old friend, all the happiness you deserve, for your fidelity and courage have never been questioned.” ‘‘ No,” said Captain Morton, ‘‘ they have not; and this last act of his in carrying away the presiding priestess of the bar at the Morton Arms, to my mind, required no Lit’le of that excellent quality. We will not keep you and your bride, Rafferty, to whom we will wish all joy, any Jonger, Go and make yourself comicbooks. com