Life — May 24, 1917 — page 1: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Weddings WEDDING is a party where two people who are in . , love with cach other agree to spend their lives in try- Before the wedding takes place, all the tradespeople within a radius of ten miles are notified, and all the rela- tives within one thousand miles, and the groom is served until the fatal moment arrives, when he is to hand over the ring and his freede Because it is the acknowledged There are two kinds of weddings: house and church banquet water—the home fa- When a wedding js held in a house, a prominent circus man is consulted, and he sends his main tent, which, vorite—and. most popular in after having laced in the hack yard, is filled with waiters, champag 1 relatives. Also several other peo- the clubs—try it: yourself. ple who, having been forced against their will to. buy 15 grains of Lithia Salts wedding presents, felt it incumbent upon them te come to the gallon. a te the position of said wedding presents, in order Sold everywhere in splits, pints and quarts only, to determine just where they stand with the family of the iride. In the front of the house is also placed a canvas, {as to cover up the confusion of the bride and ’ “ye . and alse to protect the aforemen- Don’t accept ordinary waters. Nioned! quests from ait, snow, hail and curiosity of evening begin to fall upon the un- happy scene, which with our modest pen we have attempted to deserihe, the wedding | kfast is then held, and the Insist. on genuine presents removed to a place of safety, from which, later on, they can be exchanged for other things fully as useless The church wedding is usually held in a church, but it is not improbable in the near future that it will be trans- WAUKESHA. WIS. ferred to some other building, as churches are no longer on regle in the best circles. When the members of the immediate family and relatives have been firmly strapped down in their seats in the front part of the church, and separated from hoi polloi by a department-store ribbon, the rest of the world is then per- saeco mitted to enter, after which the bride, reclining demurely on the arm of her father, sails down the aisle, and is met at the altar by the clergyman, with a glad smile. The choir boys are then permitted to sing a song, and the bridegroom is assisted to the fatal spot hy two or three of his closest friends, who hypnotize him into fulfilling his part of the contract. The minister is the only one who comes ont ahead in the game. the amount ranging from one to one thousand dollars. Later on, the bride and groom, after they have returned from their honeymoon, either settle down to a life of quict and obscure friction or else make their arrangements, at the end of a few gnonths, to take the unlimited accommo- dation train to the valley of unrest ria Reno LOW as a moon - bathed landscape—pure as a wood- land stream—tich house of Mother the hills"—Cascade. Original Bottling Has Old Gold Label Gro. A. DicKeL & Co, Distillers Nashville, Tenn.,and Louisville, Ky. PURE WHISKY CORFUKAL BENKS DECIDES TO FIRE THE COOK comicbooks.com