Judge — October 1937 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

7” aw eemws ao aun * ALI BABA’S MOTHER RACE is a well-known actress now, and rich—comparatively. She is tall and blond and fifty-ish and incred- ibly funny, especially when she tries to be dignified. Then she becomes very British and very lofty. Back in Prohibition days, Grace— both poor and unknown—was doing a bit in some one’s play, and appearing in morning performances for children. “Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves” it was. Grace went home to Tuckahoe when the curtain went down at night, and was back in town at eleven next morning to amuse the kiddies—or rather to carn the money. She was on the wag- on then. For one thing, liquor was too expensive and she thought it made her fat. But she felt she ought to keep some- thing on hand for friends. One Friday night, when guests were due for the weekend, Grace patronized a bootlegger —a pint of rye. After the play that night, she unwrapped the bottle in her dressing-room. She was feeling adven- turous. “How about a little nip?” she asked the girl who dressed with her. So they had a little nip, and after the girl left, Grace had another ni, several of them. Then she wrapped up the bottle, and took the cross-town car to Grand Central. She had several min- utes before her train. “I'll go to the Ladies’ Room,” thought Grace. NEXT day she felt very queer. She lay in bed for a while, with her eyes closed, trying to collect her thoughts. When she opened her eyes, she was mildly astonished to see a bed on her right. “Did I go to sleep in the guest- room?” wondered Grace. On her left—but she couldn't see anything on that side. Raising her hand to her left eye, she found it bandaged. “Heavens!” she thought. Then she discovered that, instead of her silk pyjamas, she was wearing an abbreviated “shift” of some coarse ma. terial. “Alice!” Grace cried loudly. Alice was her sister. “Alice!” Grace raised herself on her elbows. Horrified, she saw other beds—beds with people in them. Patients. She was, it seemed, in a “ward.” But where? What had happened? What time was it? She was due at eleven, made-up, for “Ali Baba.” Some of the patients were making peculiar noises. Her mind reeled. Then, to her great relief, she saw a nurse. Grace sat bolt upright— British, imperious. “Nurse!” Passing her bed, the nurse looked at her strangely. October 1937 “Nurse, where am 1?” “You're all right, dear, Lie down!” “I will not lie down! What time is it?” The nurse came a little nearer. “Never mind that now. Just you lie down.” Grace became desperate. She jumped out of bed. Her one eye glared. “Listen to me!" she commanded the nurse. “I've got to go. I'm Ali Baba’s mother!” The nurse seemed sympathetic. “Yes, dear, of course! Now you just get back in bed.” She put a hand on Grace's arm, but Grace shook it off. “Do you understand me? I'm Ali Baba’s mother in—" “Of course you are, dear!’ Grace's voice grew strident. “Will you let me out of here?” Suddenly, another nurse appeared. She Tooked owerful. “What's the matter?” she snapped. The first nurse whispered something. “Tl tell you what's the matter,” Grace began, but she found herself pushed strongly to the rear. “You ff in bed!" the big nurse trumpeted. “I want a per- fume that will make a man for- get everything!” ‘HE “Ali Baba” company was pretty frantic when Ali Baba’s mother failed to appear. They telephoned Tuck- ahoe, but all they got was “Alice” in hysterics. Grace never stayed out all night without telling her! At eleven. fifteen the kiddies were stamping impa- tiently. It looked as though the per- formance would have to be cancelled. Suddenly a shout went up. “Here she comes!” From an ambulance near the stage. door issued Grace—her hat on back- ward, one black eye, a nurse on her left and an interne on her right. A doctor followed closely. The Ali Baba Com. pany watched, aghast. Presently, Grace's voice was heard on the stairs. “Miss Miles!” Miss Miles was Directress of the Chil. dren's Theatre. Trembling, she hurried down. “Tell them!" shouted Grace. “Tell these god-damned fools I'm Ali Baba’s mother!” A critic, reviewing the performance for a juvenile magazine, remarked: “The actress who portrayed the mother of Ali Baba seemed to be laboring un- der great duress. We therefore reserve opinion till a later performance.” —Joun Hoysrapt comicbooks.com