Judge — January 1933 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Inferior Decorating By Jack Thornton Dustam, Funstum and Lillywater, Interior Decorators, New York City. Darear Sirs: Acceeding to your request of the other day that I could help e time in furnishing up my apartment by searching out ernes in the various shops I am here to state I done so. The reasen I looked so sleepy when you first mentioned ernes to me at apartment was simply and because I didn’t know what meant. So I bought a dic- tionary d looked it up. To my great surprise I found that “ernes” means eagles. Now, Im not ques- tioning a specialist like you—but I cant understand what I want two eagles on them high tables for. However to carry out your idea I looked in all the animal stores I could find and not a single one had a erne and they never heard of your idea of putting them in a living room on tables. But leave that go. Moreover the dealers said they didn’t know where I could get some unless it was Australia and you can’t expect me to go away out there just to carry out a decoration scheme. If its eagles you want, the good old American specie and the symblum of our coun- try which was good enough for our anc s should be good enough for me. I guess my only chance is for me to steal a couple from the zoo. I saw some over in Central Pa don’t look very so big I think we'll have to get along with one in the living room and put the other in the kitchen or maybe the dining alcove. Also I don’t think from their uncongenial manner that they'll stand for Laurel Leaves being stuck into them. But you ought to know. They look to me as tho they could whip a Tiger. However they may get along with I and God knows I hope so. S 0 much for that. Now to get down to more instant and important business. That new colored maid, who I must is a gem of the dark variety, and who cooks lousy but I hired because she can answer the phone good just gave me your phone messages—which almost knocked me down. She says you said the Burro for my bedroom will be here Monday or Tuesday. “dw, shucks, boss, a guy who's been out o' work three years can't get into the swing of it in a couple days.’ comicbooks.com