Judge — January 23, 1932 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE Help! Fire! Merger! FT * door-to-door salesmen are asting their time, and they are wasting the housewives’ time. One rings the bell and offers this; another rings and offers that; a third offers something else—and the next thi 1 woman knows it’s five o'clock, a gracious goodness, and the roast not in the oven. Why don’t the salesmen organize? They could organize and send one mman around ance daily to sell every- thing. ‘The plan is etliciency itself. “Good mornin ays the daily salesman, shoving ot in the door, “L represent the Amalgamated Asso- ciation of Doorbell Ringers.” “( | “Now here is a vacuum cleaner | which hums a tune as it cleans, the salesman, launching his sales “How about a combination waflle iron and tire retreader? Would you want | a sunburn cure and silverware pol- J" says the housewife. j isher? Got enough coal to last?” You see, this man has already ts the place of four salesmen, And he has hardly begun. “Do you cut your hair or does a barber cut it?" he continues. “And how about a combination rug and ¢ > Do you want some rubber-heeled stilts to use for swatting flies on the ceiling?” “Nothing today,” says t wife. “I'm going to town “Ah, be ys the salesman, “TI take you right there in my car.” See how it works? Swell idea. —Tom Sims and income tax beate » house- “Tl tell you when we get home, dear.” A Journalist Proposes [ "85 2 story from your lips. The news, I know, is there. This beat seems pretty futile, though— My copy desk is bare. I have some headlines all set up. The time and place are ripe To tell the world you love me, dear, In big italic type. We'll pull the biggest scoop the world Has witnessed in ar I'll run your cut and caption With Streamers on the page. Some day we'll have a supplement, Or maybe quite a few. Just say you'll be my twelve-point lead And I'll belong to you. “Polly's asking for a cracker—she's deaf and dumb!” 15 comicbooks.com