Judge — April 18, 1931 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE man from the country—that would go fine where you talk about stock. I'll change it for you... There, that’s mar- velous. Oh, and when you come to this part about ‘budget,’ you can say “That reminds me,’ and then tell them the one Alice Wimple told at the last bridge club. About the young married woman who was boasting that she'd saved so much on household expenses that they'd been able to buy a second-hand car, and her friend said, ‘Budget?’ and she said, ‘Yes, with a little patience and perseve Oh, that’s fine, John. I'll write it in for you... . That's wonderful. And then this part where you mention ‘overhead.’ You can say something about that everybody ought to be glad they're not in the airplane business because think of all the overhead! And I'll just indicate to c over to this same paragraph the part about ‘inflation,’ and you can bring in something about balloons, too... What did you say, dear?” “Nothing. “Oh. I thought you said ‘Oh, swell.” But I suppose 1 just imagined it-—-I might know you wouldn't enthuse about anything vou did yourself, you're so modest. Well, anyway, I just bet that when you speak this piece tomor- row it'll certainly make them all open their eyes. Really, SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE it’s just wonderful, John! So clever, And to think you “C' John, hello! L've just heen reading your piece did it all yourself! Maniax Derrrien that you're going to speak ! My what that I'm g to which?” Why, didn't you tell me you're going to speak a piece at your conference meeting tomorrow 2” © a speceh? Oh, of course. Well, any vay I've been reading what vou wrote, and I think it’s just wonderful, John!” And keep that d—n parrot away from the radio!” it's perfectly marvelous. So brainy. And you did it all yourself! It scems impossible, dear.” “Ump. othing much, ‘Sjust something I dashed off, Ahem. “Well, I think it's wonderful for you to be so smart ind know how to do such things all by yourself... John, i thought of something while I was reading it. You chose such a serious topice— Advantages and Disadvan- tages of Present Proposed Project of Increased Distribu- tion in Relation to Foreign Markets and the Import Tax.” Why don’t you make it funny instead, di “Huh?” “Or else you could keep your same subject, since you've gone to all the trouble of writing it, but just treat. it ina humorous way. For instance, in- stead of being so formal when you start out. why not make a sort of a wisecrack or something You know—something to put everybody in a jolly humor and make them wonder what's coming that’s cer- I'll just cross out what you note in the mar- ght forget... . - Then in this next where you have a lot of don’t you tell a funny story instead? People don’t want to hear a lot of dull old statistics, they want to be amused! How about that : : © Mr. Johnston told at the Wat- > “Will ya dig us a coupla Kinses’ dinner? That one about the : worms, mister?” comicbooks.com