Judge — June 8, 1929 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

o “Forewarned .. . ” Sooner or later, about this time, the distasteful subject of family picnics is coming up. You m be coasting along, happy a clam at high tide, with the income tax paid and a good start on your summer sunburn, when the thing will raise its ugly head to poison your week-ends, It has remained for a great in- ventor to present a solution to the acid bitterness ndered over the selection of a place to cat the basket lunch. Within a few months, every automobile will have one of these dials on its dashboard as standard equipment, along with the cigar lighter, hair curler, pants presser and toaster. “It's really simple de- vice,” the inventor explained modestly. “But so was the phonograph and the telephone,” I reminded him, “Ah, to be sure—but this cuts even deeper into the vital human need.” It was, indeed, simple. Just a white celluloid circle, divided into a dozen sections, like a cut pie. In the center, on a pivot, was mounted a metal hand, on a spin- ner. of the dise had a few words printed thereon. I read them, turning it slow! around: “Pine Point,” “Aunt Car- rd,” “St Home,” ch,” “Oak Grove,” ay Home,” “Long Beach, “North Pond,” Each section home— Cumorractic Patientr—Say, doc, aintchoo stretchin’ things a bit too far? SLOB wouan vita Turkish bath on Evans Street. to have that cut on your bean doc,” groused the invalid stitching or embroidery!” “T just Clew down the gannets, reef up the PIANO "ast And now for a little personal massage for a marble slob in a “Yeh, itll cost you twenty clams »” advised a sawhones. “G canted plain sewing, not hem- gaskets, get out and get under the moon. “Gre: I exclaimed. “But does the family like it—leaving such a serious matter to chance? “They cat it up,” said the great man simply. “After breakfast Sunday we gather around the car, fairly popping with excitement. Generally, two out of three spins re thing, though some- y wife, or her mother, or her sister, or some of the young- sters will demand three out of five.” I made an experimental spin, shuddering slightly as the hand stopped first at “Aunt Car- rie’s front yard,” and then, on the second try, wobbled to a ghast- ly halt over “Far Rock . “But you,” I protested, “how does this protect you, and the thousands of other harassed hus bands who want only to be let alone on Sundays?” He smiled craftily, made a swift adjustment on the reverse of the dial, and spun five “Stay Home's” in a row. —Stantey Jones Weather Note Thongh skies stay grim and gray, No showers pierce the murk Until the time of day at I start home from work! ALL.L. ~ comicbooks.com